This woman is obsessed with huffing her rats. Read More »
We’ve survived the ”Sharknado” and the “Birdemic” – but are we prepared for the newest killer animal on the block? Check out “Squirrels,” a horror movie about — you guessed it — killer squirrels. It’s currently in pre-production and still in the fundraising phase, but director Timur Bekmambetov is hoping we’ll bite. Bekmambetov has directed actually well-known movies like “Wanted” and “Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter,” and explains the plot thusly:
“When a young man’s estranged father is killed under suspicious circumstances, he returns home for the first time in years to get to the bottom of the mystery. Hoping to uncover some logical explanation, he instead finds his mom’s sleazy new boyfriend, a natural gas company buying up the town, an angry female sheriff who happens to be his ex-girlfriend, and an army of flesh-eating squirrels hellbent on destroying everything in their path due to an erosion of their food chain as a result of environmental destruction by the gas company.”
So it’s got an environmental message, too? We’re sold. [Digital Spy]
Watch out, these adorable animals on wheels will roll into your heart. 11 Photos »
Do you know what a rat king is? It’s a half-myth, sort-of, kind-of real thing where a bunch of rats get their tails stuck together. You can click here to see an actual specimen, but warning, it’s one of those things — like a snake opening a fucking door by itself — that you can’t unsee.
According to folklore, rat kings are considered a bad omen. A very gross, bad omen. But what of the Squirrel King?
Oh, the Squirrel King, you say? What’s that? Click through to find out. Keep reading »
Mikey the One-Eyed Cat is stuck inside, on the window’s ledge, where he can only dream of batting at the squirrels that run amok in his front yard. And that’s why one particularly cruel squirrel has taken to taunting Mikey, by eating nuts right in front of the friggin’ window — in what would be scratching distance — if it weren’t for that thick pane of glass separating the two. So, sadly, instead of running after the brazen squirrel, Mikey is left to have an existential crisis about his point in this life. If not squirrels, then what? [Laughing Squid]
Where do you store your nuts for the winter? This savvy British squirrel stashed hundreds of acorns in the exhaust pipe of a car. When the vehicle failed to start, the driver assumed there was a mechanical problem and called AA, a roadside rescue service. AA employee Andy Smith came to the scene, and was baffled when he could find no obvious issue with the car. Then, while the engine was being revved, Andy saw an air pipe collapse. Upon removing the air intake, countless acorns came pouring out. They removed the remainder of the acorn and the car was restored to working order – but, as Andy Smith said, “I just hope the wee thing has plenty of other stashes buried away for the winter,” or else he’s out of luck. He gets an “A” for intelligence. [Newslite]
You know what gives me confidence in a law firm? A badly rendered dancing, rapping squirrel. And that’s exactly what the baby geniuses at Greenstein and Milbauer decided to use in this “1-800-Victim-2″ commercial for their law firm. Which I’ve seen approximately 977 times while watching “Maury Povich.” [YouTube] Keep reading »
A cat mama takes in a baby squirrel and lets him nurse. Nothing that new. But what is: the squirrel has apparently learned how to purr from its surrogate mother. Unrelated: newscaster Walt Grayson is definitely working a “Casual Friday,” just-came-from-tailgating-a-Jimmy-Buffet-concert vibe. [YouTube] Keep reading »
We never saw this on “Law & Order.” While a detective was interviewing this woman as a character witness for a murder suspect, he got a big surprise—she was carrying a living squirrel in her cleavage! Every time the little rodent popped out of her breasts, she shoved him back in… as if this were a completely normal thing. Now Miss, may I suggest that if you wanted a squirrel to stay in your cleavage, maybe you should not have worn such an ill-fitting, low-cut shirt? And who can trust a woman with a squirrel living between her breasts? Keep reading »