Snooki rear-ended a cop car in Florence, Italy, this weekend, sending two police officers to the hospital with whiplash. Snooki, her pal Deena, and a “Jersey Shore” film crew member were being escorted by the cop car, which pinned Snooki’s car against a highway wall after the crash. This surely won’t do any good to improve Jersey-Italy relations, which have been wilting like a bouffant with too much hair gel ever since the “Jersey Shore” cast announced they’d be filming a season in their homeland. Miraculously, though, no limoncello shots (or any other alcohol) were involved in this fender bender! Despite all those trips up and down the NJ Turnpike, Snooki’s just a plain ol’ bad driver. [NY Post] Keep reading »
“As everyone’s planning their night at the club … I’m wondering when Gold’s [Gym] closes …[I have] egg whites in the morning and chicken and salads … And if you do drink, it’s gotta be clear liquors. [Margaritas] are, like, a million calories.”
– Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi on her new fitness regime. I mean, good for her. But I will certainly miss watching her get sloppy. I’m sure she’ll be just as entertaining sober. And what about pickles? I hope she still eats! [People] Keep reading »
On Thursday night, Snooki spoke at Rutgers University in New Jersey, just a short drive from Seaside Heights, and pulled in a crowd of 2,000 students. “When you’re tan, you feel better about yourself,” she said, as words of wisdom for the students. “Study hard, but party harder.” Parents, of course, are up in arms about this. Especially when the news broke that Rutgers paid Snooki an insanely whopping $32,000 for her appearance. That’s $10,000 more than the school’s annual tuition and housing fees. And it’s also $2,000 more than the university
paid will pay Toni Morrison, famed author and Nobel Prize winner, for her commencement address last this year.
After the jump, some more famous faces Snooki banked more than for her appearance. Keep reading »
A couple weeks ago, I caught the nasty cold that’s been going around. Coughing, feverish, and too tired to leave my couch, I drew the blinds and searched for comfort in the Netflix “instant watch” section. Instead I found Jersey Shore Season 2. I’d never seen the show before and thought this might be a good time to check it out and see what all the fuss is about. I ended up watching the entire season, continuously–all 13 hours of it.
I didn’t eat. I didn’t sleep. I had no interaction with any other human beings. The sun set outside my apartment sometime during episode 11, cloaking the world in darkness, and by the time the credits rolled for the season finale, I would barely recognize the person I’d become. Maybe watching one or two episodes of Jersey Shore is a fun thing to do every once in awhile, but taking in an entire season in one sitting will absolutely ruin your life. Here’s how… Keep reading »
“If I do something stupid, which is pretty much the whole time, I hate it … Obviously, they’re only going to put the good stuff in, and the good stuff is us drunk, so all I’m seeing is me drunk and falling down. That’s how I am when I party, but some of the stuff I do is, like, ‘Really, Nicole?’ I look like a freakin’ alcoholic. I’m like, ‘You’re sweating, your makeup is running, you look gross.’ I just look like s**t .”
– Snooki in Rolling Stone on how she comes off on “Jersey Shore.” I appreciate Snooki’s brutal honesty. I think that’s what makes her such a lovable little meatball. That being said, I totally support her not getting drunk in front of the camera anymore. I think she’s better than that. Also, I happen to find her highly entertaining while sober. [Huffington Post] Keep reading »
“[My boyfriend]‘s definitely not a gorilla juicehead. But, you know, he’s a guido. … I would consider Regis a hot ape. A grown-up gorilla.”
—Surprise! Snooki‘s latest hookup on “Jersey Shore,” the one the guys busted in on her with in the smush room, is now her boyfriend. She tells Regis Philbin and Kelly Ripa about him, and throws Regis some love at the same time. Let’s just hope we don’t see Regis get progressively tanner over the next few weeks. [TV Squad] Keep reading »
Here’s an illustrated clip from the new literary work Snooki in Wonderland. I think I know what happens next. Snooki drinks the potion and gets arrested for public drunkenness. This one’s gonna be a page turner. Get your copy here for only 99 cents. [Snooki in Wonderland] Keep reading »
“I kind of wish me and Vinny didn’t try and have sex, because it was just drama this whole season. And I don’t know, it was just awkward between us and then I felt stupid because … you’ll see, it’s just embarrassing.”
—Snooki tells “The Morning Mash Up” that she wishes she hadn’t hooked up with her guidotastic “Jersey Shore” roommate. Don’t be embarrassed, Snooki. Friendships with benefits are seriously confusing. In better news, Snooki says things are going great with her new dude, Jionni LaValle. I feel good about it too since he hasn’t tried to milk her for all the fame she’s worth. [People] Keep reading »
I should probably find this video of Snooki giving an 11-year-old a makeover in her likeness — heavily applied bronzer, poof, and all — really offensive. She’s a kid! She doesn’t need to look like a Jersey guidette with alcohol running through her veins! But I don’t know, I found this makeover kind of adorable and silly and funny. I mean, Snooki is a cartoon character. Like Dora the Explorer. What’s the harm in that? Keep reading »