Tag Archives: slut shaming

The Soapbox: Porn Stars Learn They Can’t Bank On Chase

chase-bank-042214

I’ve written before about issues around payment processors and the sex industry, how businesses like Paypal, WePay and Google Wallet were shutting anyone they suspected of sex work out of using their services.

Well, turns out that a trickle down effect is happening within the banking world, as Chase recently sent letters out to hundreds of porn performers telling them their bank accounts would be shut down May 11th. Perez Hilton posted a photo of one of these letters from adult performer Teagan Presley, and while I am somewhat loath to link to his blog, I think it’s important to read the language. You’ll notice that Chase never specifically cites adult work in their decision, just that they “reviewed the account and determined that we will be closing it on May 11, 2014. Please accept our apologies for the inconvenience.”

I’m sure they’re terribly sorry. Just as they were really apologetic for refusing to process payments for Lovability CEO Tiffany Gaines. Her crime? Selling condoms, because they’re “adult-oriented material”. The same adult oriented material, of course, as Trojan, who could process their payments with no issues through Chase, but never mind. As long as they’re really sorry about it. Keep reading »

Frisky Q&A: Melissa Gira Grant, Author Of Playing The Whore: The Work Of Sex Work

Melissa Gira Grant Playing The Whore

If you’ve done any reading on the Internet about the business of sex work, chances are you’ve come across Melissa Gira Grant. She’s written about sex, politics, labor and tech everywhere from the UK’s Guardian to The Atlantic  to Jezebel and Valleywag, making her one of the top intellectuals to turn to when America needs an explanation about why we’re so weird about sex.

A former “web cam girl,” Grant just published her latest book, Playing The Whore: The Work Of Sex Work, which is unlike any book about sex work or feminism that I’ve ever read. In it, she critiques law enforcement’s treatment of actual or perceived sex workers; labor issues surrounding sex work; and the tendency for governments and some outreach workers to treat all sex workers as “victims” in need of being “rescued.” However complicated you might have thought issues pertaining to sex work were before, Grant’s excellent book is extraordinarily illuminating.

Grant recently spoke to me about “whore stigma,” feminism, police, and the media’s struggle to accurately cover sex workers. Our Q&A begins after the jump: Keep reading »

8 Reasons More Women Don’t Write About Sex

8 Reasons More Women Don't Write About Sex

Like many daydreamers, I often think about time periods other than the one I’m currently living in that I would most likely enjoy. I usually settle on the roaring ’20s (it’s easy to get caught up in how cute everyone would look with flapper dresses and bobbed hair). Then I remember, of course, what the ’20s were actually like. Women had only recently secured the right to vote, abortion was illegal, penicillin and birth control were very new, and employment opportunities were still divided into men- and women-only. (Guess who had the less attractive options?)

This little game is just a daydream. Yet it ends up always serving as a reminder that I’m fortunate to be a woman the 21st century. And that’s a reminder I’m ashamed to admit, as a feminist, that I need somewhat often. There are times when being a woman even in 2014 feels disappointing — things should be better, things should have changed more. I’m privileged as an educated white, middle-class woman that these things are as few as they are. But one of the very biggest areas that needs changing is women writing about sex. Keep reading »

Bank Of America Sends The Most Slut-Shaming Credit Card Offer Of All Time

When freelance writer Lisa McIntire’s mother received this Bank of America credit card offer addressed to her daughter, “Lisa Is a Slut McIntire,” she was understandably disturbed.  She immediately texted Lisa, who promptly shared the photos of her offensive credit card offer on Twitter. Is this like the corporate equivalent of tee-peeing someone’s house? How does this happen? [Gawker]

Elementary School Teacher Kaitlin Pearson Suspended After Semi-Nude Modeling Photos Anonymously Sent To Boss

kaitlin pearson modeling

Grossness: some douchebag anonymously mailed semi-nude modeling photos of Fitchburg, Massachusetts, elementary school special needs assistant Kaitlin Pearson to her employer and local newspaper. And now the 23-year-old’s side-career of modeling may cost her her job.  Keep reading »

Rashida Jones Addresses That Time She Told Other Women To “Stop Acting Like Whores”

rashida jones whores tweet

You may remember back in October when Our Collective Imaginary Best Friend/”Parks & Rec” actress Rashida Jones gave everyone a big case of the “UGHs” when she took to Twitter to complain about the over-sexualization of female celebrities. In a series of tweets, Rashida mused “she who comes closet to showing the actual inside of her vagina is most popular” with the hashtag #stopactinglikewhores and urged us “to take a look at what we are accepting as the norm.”

I didn’t disagree with Rashida Jones’ observations. But using “whore” as a derogatory term? Not cool. And implying women are “whores” for behaving sexually in ways you may not like? Really not cool.

In the January issue of Glamour, Rashida addresses the blowback to her remarks and how she was “shocked” (really?) by the responses: Keep reading »

Chinese High School Bans Colorful Underwear Because Boobs

Miniskirts Banned
Indonesia banning miniskirts so female lawmakers don't "invite rape." Read More »
Another Miniskirt ban
Italian town considers a miniskirt ban to "restore urban decorum." Read More »
Uggs Banned By School
Uggs were banned at one middle school, but it's not why you think. Read More »
chinese high school bans colorful bra and panties
  • A Chinese high school has banned girls from wearing “anything but flesh-colored bras and underwear” because colorful delicates are showing through the school’s uniform. Solid-colored bras will evoke one punishment and for patterned bras the punishment will be even higher. Boys, it seems, are still allowed to wear boxer briefs from every color of the rainbow.  Here’s an idea, chuckleheads: maybe get thicker school uniforms?! [Shanghaiist via The Gloss]
  • Following an incident where a Black-skinned pageant winner was de-crowned because her Latina heritage could not be confirmed [fourth item], the Little Miss Hispanic Delaware pageant will require contestants to show papers proving they are Latina. This, of course, is problematic because Latinas can also be Black, white, redheaded, etc. and Latina heritage isn’t always something that is documented. [Feministing] Keep reading »

Rashida Jones To Other Female Stars: “Stop Acting Like Whores”

  • Rashida Jones, who is not usually one to court controversy, tweeted that she wishes her fellow female entertainers would “stop acting like whores” and she’s tired that “she who comes closest to showing the actual inside of her vagina is most popluar.” She then backtracked with another tweet, “Let me clarify. I don’t shame anyone for anything they choose to do with their lives or bodies, but I think we all need to take a look at what we are accepting as the norm.” I don’t disagree with Rashida, but shame on her for calling other women ‘whores.’  [US Weekly]
  • Davion Only, the  15-year-old Florida boy from foster care who went to a church and pleaded for a family to adopt him, has gotten over 10,000 responses nationwide. [People] Keep reading »

An Open Letter To The Parents Of SlaneGirl, The Teen Who Gave Blowjobs At The Eminem Concert & Got Slutshamed Across The Internet

Who Is Slanegirl?
slanegirl eminem concert blowjob
She's an Irish teenager photographed giving blowjobs at a concert. Read More »
Be Sex Positive!
Eight ways to be positive you're sex positive. Read More »
On Slutshaming
It's about controlling women through guilt and shame. Read More »

Dear The Parents Of SlaneGirl,

I can’t tell you how many conversations I’ve had this week about your daughter. You know her as a baby girl you brought into the world 17 years ago. The Internet knows her as SlaneSlut or SlaneGirl. This week, her full name and photographs of her performing oral sex on two different men at an Eminem concert made their way around the world. They were posted on every social media site you can think of and shared repeatedly (with little regard to the fact your daughter is under 18 and the images technically constitute child pornography). The two young fellas she fellated have mostly enjoyed high fives from the universe. But your daughter? She’s been called a slut, a whore, a dumb bitch — every stinging slur in the book. She was hospitalized this week from from her reaction to all this negative attention.

When I’ve been thinking about your daughter, I’ve really been thinking about you — her parents.  I’ve been thinking about what I would do or say if I were in your shoes, about you could possibly have to say to her about all this. Keep reading »

Teenage Girl Gives Blowjobs At Eminem Concert, Pictures Posted Online, Epic Slut-Shaming Ensues

On Slutshaming
It's about controlling women through guilt and shame. Read More »
Jenna Marbles Slut Shames
On Jenna Marbles' "Things I Don't Understand About Sluts" video. Read More »
No Slutty Friends
college women dont' want friends who are promiscuous
College-aged women don't want to be friends with "sluts," study says. Read More »
slanegirl eminem concert blowjob

By now you might have heard about the 17-year-old girl who was photographed giving blowjobs in the crowd at an Eminem concert in Slane, Ireland.

There are supposedly three pictures of her in existence: one showing her performing oral sex on a man and then two others showing her kissing a different man and then performing oral sex on him, too. After these three pics were uploaded online and made their way around the Internet, SlaneGirl (as she is being referred to) had her full name revealed and her school identified. She’s been called a “slut,” a “tramp,” a “stupid bitch” and told that she deserves to be made a mockery of.

I’m sure you will be shocked – shocked! – to hear the young man photographed getting head, with both his arms raised in the air in triumph, is not gathering quite the same scorn. Keep reading »

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