Tag Archives: single

6 Times I Am So Damn Happy To Be Single (In Honor Of Singles Day!)

6 Times I Am So Damn Happy To Be Single (In Honor Of Singles Day!)

This morning, I was talking to my therapist about boys and she asked me what I ultimately am really looking for in a partner, by which she (and I) mean someone I could see myself seriously dating. “Well, to be honest, sometimes I am really, really happy to not have a boyfriend, because boyfriends tend to distract from all the other things I’m busy doing,” I said. “But I also really would like to meet someone I seriously dig, who also seriously digs me in the same way, and considers spending time with me one of their priorities, as opposed to something they fit in when they feel like it.”

“You want to really matter to someone,” my therapist interjected.

“Yes!” I said. “And the thing is, it’s not that I even desire all that much attention because the thing I don’t like about relationships is how much time they can take up. Really, it would be great to have a amazing, loving, cool boyfriend about 70 percent of the time, and the other 30 percent of the time he would be tucked away in a closet where he can’t get up to any funny business while I spent my time weaving for hours on end and eating ice cream for dinner.” Keep reading »

The 6 Imaginary Boyfriends You Need

The 6 Imaginary Boyfriends You Need

Being single is far superior to being tied down to some lovable douche who makes you ditch girls’ nights for private pizza parties. While you could argue that being Facebook official is useful for holiday parties, heavy lifting, and little spoon opportunities, boyfriends are really more trouble than they’re worth. In fact, you’d be better off investing in a puppy, instead. All of the cuddles, and 100% less of the pressure to feign interest in sports. The truth is, boyfriends would be incredibly useful if you could exchange them (along with your outfits) for different parties and seasons. In this beautiful imaginary world (where chocolate has no calories and Lilly Pulitzer is always free), every occasion would call for a new boy toy custom made for the event. Read More On College Candy…

7 Benefits Of Sexual Dry Spells

7 Benefits Of Sexual Dry Spells

We live in a society that has us believe that if we’re not getting any, then our life is a failure. OK, that might be dramatic. But if you’re not getting laid your friends often look at you with pity in their eyes, as they try to console you with promises that you’ll have sex again, someday, even if that someday is five years from now. Read more on YourTango.com…

Simple And Genius: A Kid’s Guide To Picking Up Chicks

How To Pick Up Chicks

“Experts” are constantly telling us how to do things: How To Find Your Soulmate In 5 Days, How To Brew Your Own Beer, How To Write The Perfect Love Letter and so on. But I’m convinced the kids of the world should really be the ones running it, what with their impartial insights and inability to bullshit. Lucky for those of you who need some help with the ladies, some smart kid has written a no-fail guide on “How To Pick Up Chicks” (which he spelled ‘Checks,’ but this has nothing to do with banking). This, my friends, is how it’s done. [Reddit]

 

All The Single Ladies (Are Getting Politicians Excited)!

"Cold Beer And Titties"
texas flag
This is what teen boys in Texas campaigned for at a civics conference. Read More »
Suffragette Snark
Suffragette Snark
Who says feminists are humorless?! Read More »
Coping With Sexism
How to Ignore the Relentless Flow of Sexist BS So You Don't Live in Constant Rage
How to ignore the relentless flow of sexist BS so you aren't enraged. Read More »
single ladies beyonce

I don’t have much money to donate, so I assume politicians don’t care about me personally. But I guess I forgot about various “voting blocs” and how I’m probably listed on a sheet somewhere as “female,” “middle-class” and maybe “shrieking feminist harpy.” Even though — obviously — all Latinos or veterans or parents don’t vote the same way, politicians and their henchmen know they can reach these groups by appealing to issues that are important to them. And according to The New York Times, the voting bloc du jour, the one that could make a difference in the 2014 midterm elections, are single women. Keep reading »

20 Signs You’re Really, Really Single

signs-you-are-single

Sometimes your single status is a scarlet letter that has been sewn on your forehead, other times your delusions have you believing this dry spell is more sunny California than Sahara Desert. If you aren’t sure of just how single you are, this list will help you. Read more on College Candy…

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