My older brother tortured me through childhood, but now he’s saving my lifestyle. According to a new study, I’m less likely to spawn thanks to my big bro. Yay, baby free forever! (Can you tell I don’t want kids?) Sheffield University researchers, who poured over birth, marriage, and death records, discovered that anyone, male or female, with an older male sibling is 5% less likely to have children than people with female older siblings. They also have children later in life and space their babies out. (Hmm, maybe we are just wiser?) On the downside, guys’ younger siblings are much more likely to be shorter. So that explains why my brother is over six foot while I’m one inch away from legally being a little person! The theory being tossed around is that first-born males took a toll on your mom back in the womb and researchers believe it has even more psychological implications on the siblings that came after. In time, I hope science will give me the go ahead to send my big bro my therapy bills.  Meanwhile, I’m just grateful he’s helping me keep my curves childproof. There’s only room for one baby in this family—me! [Daily Mail]

Some stories are truly stranger than fiction. Darla and Mark Pritchard tried to have a baby for five years, but nothing was working, even after two in-vitro fertilization attempts. Then, Darla’s twin sister, Dana Johnson, offered to be a surrogate, and it seems that both Darla and Dana had Darla eggs (fertilized by Mark) implanted, and both became pregnant. Darla gave birth to twins, and six weeks later, Dana gave birth to a girl. Even though they came out of different women and don’t all have the same birth date, the three children are considered triplets. Even Darla and Dana seem a little confused when they try to talk about the ordeal in the above video. [CBS News]

Say you’re in high school. You and your boyfriend are hooking up on the couch after school. TRL is on the TV in the background. Your mom walks in. According to new game theory research, you’re more likely to be punished for risky sexual activity if you have little brothers or sisters. This is because parents feel that they need to maintain their reputation as a disciplinarian, and if they don’t punish you, the young’uns will get the idea that they can get away with anything. But at least you have someone to torment. [Newswise]

When we read the April issue of Marie Claire, we seriously bugged out over the story, “My Sister The Porn Star” by Robert Radin. First of all, it was depressing and creepy, two words we’re not used to associating with a fashion-happy lady mag. Second of all, it kind of pissed us off that the writer of the story seemed to be weirdly voyeuristic and, dare we say it, pervy about discovering that his sister was an adult film star. While the article went into the details of Radin’s sister’s tragic life, it didn’t give any insight into whether, you know, he gave a crap if she was dead or alive. Her story seemed like a quick and easy way for him to make a quick buck. Thankfully, we’re not alone in this sentiment. Nerve sums it up very nicely.