Tag Archives: shopping

Constructive Ways To Spend Your Money On Black Friday Instead Of Buying Stuff

I hate Black Friday for a lot of reasons: Because it so neatly encapsulates the total delusion of consumer culture; because most of the things you can get deals on are completely unnecessary; because I’m not a huge proponent of any sort of fanaticism but especially fanaticism over spending money; because it forces retail employees to work hours they should be spending with their families at the risk of being fired; because it provides such a stark contrast between mobs our culture accepts (mobs spending money) and mobs it doesn’t (protesters fighting injustice). I also hate it because the people who claim there’s a “war on Christmas” as a Christian holiday are often the same people who are proponents of Black Friday, a day that reduces Christmas to a secularized consumer holiday, because it’s good for the economy or something. I hate it because it entrenches consumer goods as status symbols. I hate it because it points out how many of us Americans are living in poverty, how desperate we are to provide our children with a normal, capitalist American lifestyle, and how easy it is for giant corporations to pull our strings. Keep reading »

New Dressing Room Mirrors Make You Think You’re Skinny

New Dressing Room Mirrors Make You Look Skinny

There’s a new company making dressing room mirrors that will convince you you’re skinnier than you actually are. 10 pounds lighter, to be exact. I’ve seen myself in that neon lighting, and it definitely isn’t the most flattering, so I can’t say I’d be completely averse to looking cuter while shopping. That’s why I like to think my addiction to shopping is healthy… it forces me to work out, so I don’t look beyond hideous standing in the dressing room glare.

The next time you’re in a dressing room questioning everything (and searching for tweezers, because you suddenly realize your brows are long overdue for waxing), take some time to wonder if the mirror in question is magical. If you’re shopping and an outfit makes you look particularly teeny tiny, “The Skinny Mirror” might be in play. Read more on College Candy…

This Holiday Season, Please Be Kind To Retail Employees

Last night, I was in a candy shop in my neighborhood waiting for the owner of the store to cut some marshmallows for me when a woman walked in, dropped a bag on the counter (literally dropped, as in held it high in the air over the counter and then let go, letting it fall to the surface), and told the associate at the counter, “I have to return these. They’re disgusting. I tried them, and I almost vomited.” Keep reading »

And The Average Cost Of Gwyneth Paltrow’s Holiday Gift Guide Items Is…

And The Average Cost Of Gwyneth Paltrow's Gift Guide Items Is...

Gwyneth Paltrow’s 2014 holiday gift guide is out, and it’s about as ridiculous as you’d expect. E! and ETOnline both added up the total cost of all the items on it (not including those listed as “price upon request”), and E! came up with $109,384 while ET came up with $107,309.49. By Newser’s count, there are 212 items in the guide not listed as “price upon request,” making the average cost per item about $511. Read more on Newser…

Target’s Going To Have Free Shipping On Everything, So Now You Can Either Troll Them Or Just Never Leave Your Apartment For Holiday Shopping

For the next two months, you can get free shipping on everything from Target, if you hadn’t noticed already. Woohoo, Christmas in October! No, really, though, they’re doing it to bump their holiday sales.

So yeah, that 92-cent lip balm? Free shipping. A 97-cent pack of pens? Free shipping. If you really, really hate Target, you could troll the shit out of them by placing multiple orders for individual boxes of staples at 41 cents each (while the sale on that item lasts) and then returning them to the store. Or, of course, you could skip holiday shopping with the crowds and just order everything online with no tax or shipping, which is also a legit idea.

Of course, this is the same store that had a massive data breach on credit card names, numbers, expiration dates, and CVV numbers last holiday season but heeeeey! Free shipping. Hopefully it won’t happen again. [Consumerist; CNBC]

In Neiman Marcus’ Christmas Book: $475K Perfume & More Ridiculous Things

In Neiman Marcus' Christmas Book: $475K Perfume & More Ridiculous Things

Looking for the perfect gift this holiday season? Look no further: For just $475,000, Neiman Marcus is offering the chance to design a perfume with an expert in Paris. Your fragrance will come in 14-karat gold bottles, the Dallas Morning News reports. If that doesn’t strike your fancy, perhaps one of the store’s other nine fantasy gifts, all part of this year’s exercise-in-extravagance Christmas Book, will. Read more on Newser…

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