You probably don’t think a lot about how your shoes are made ... until, that is, you’ve been standing in them for two hours and you’re thinking in dire agony, What the eff kinda person thought these heels would carry me through the day ... or the next two blocks?! Despite the painful downfalls of the high heel’s structure, there’s quite a bit of science that goes into the design just in order to make the shoe work. Balance must be achieved, and a reinforced shank must be perfectly placed and angled in order to evenly distribute weight.

Ask Christian Louboutin or Manolo Blahnik about their wares, and you might get the impression that they’re physics experts more than they are fashion designers. Blahnik tells the New York Times, “‘Balance is the most important aspect of creating a 115-millimeter heel. To achieve it, I use a compass, a ruler, my eyes and my hands.’ Some designers now use a CAD, or computer-assisted design, system in their work but Mr. Blahnik said he would rather do everything himself — ‘I am a traditionalist,’ he said.”

You may have seen photos recently of Suri Cruise running around in a pair of little high heels. She's ... 3. At first, I thought it was a Halloween thing, but she's been traipsing all over the place in them. I won't lie. They are cute. But having worn high heels for years, I know the toll they take on your feet, and I can't help but wonder about the consequences of wearing heels when your age is still in the single digits. (Remember those high heels for babies? Sure, Suri's heels are low, but she's having a hard time walking in them, clearly.

First, there was Lindsay Lohan and her preposterous line of leggings. Then came mom Dina Lohan and her “Shoe-han” shoe line. SHOE-HAN? In internet-speak, I say: WTF? Now, some anonymous individual has taken it upon himself/herself to pen a faux-Dina shoe blog featuring some wackadoddle styles that would be just perfect for the 2010 Shoe-han collection set to debut on Mother’s Day. There are the Denise Richards “It’s Complicated” gold pumps, the garbage can stripper shoes, and the My Pretty Pony patent leather heels. I hope we aren’t limited to one pair. I WANT THEM ALL. [Shoehans]

If these shoes are a question, the correct answer is yes. Jimmy Choo did H&M; now, Louise Goldin does Topshop. We love these studded pumps that look like porcupine spines for your feet. They come in chrome too and are a toned-down version of what Goldin’s models wore on the runway, sans crystals. We’ll take every color they’ve got, please. [MYKROMAG]

If conceptual fashion is wearable art, then the runway is the museum it stays in. Some designers present collections with saleability in mind; others like to make a point by going the artsy route, in which case what lands on the shelves might not be quite what you saw at the fashion shows. Apparently not so in Alexander McQueen‘s case. When his extreme platform heels recently came down the runway in Paris, they garnered a lot of attention—but did we ever once think that these shoes weren’t just for show and were, gulp, available for sale?

Old-school sneaker line Vans might be more masculine by design, but has long since become unisex by reputation, seeing as the skater boy kicks are just as popular with the skater girls. (Or any type of girl, for that matter.) Now the company is coming out with a new model for its spring collection made just for women. “The Sophie” brings the sneaker to a slightly fancier level by streamlining the design and adding the teeniest, tiniest of heels. Styles include the traditional Vans checkerboard, a black and white saddle shoe, or a blue faux denim.

What do we think of the Sophie? Prefer your Vans the way they are? Check out pics from the rest of the line after the jump! [PSFK]

I was laying about, minding my own business this weekend, when this commercial for Reebok EasyTone sneakers appeared on my TV screen. In it, a woman’s breasts A) speak, and B) discuss her butt. I mean, WTF? I had no idea A) boobs could talk, and B) boobs felt competitive towards other body parts. “Stupid butt!” the woman’s breasts agree. (Each breast has its own persona, apparently.) “Make your boobs jealous,” a man intones. Um, OK! I guess the idea here is that the shoes help you tone your bottom, which makes your breasts jealous. No word yet on what your butt has to say regarding this matter.

In the December issue of Elle, cover girl Sarah Jessica Parker talks about becoming a mother (and loving the smell of diapers) and jokes that her two daughters, Marion (called Loretta) and Tabitha, will one day raid her closet: “The only tragedy would be if their feet are bigger than mine.” Having large feet would be unfortunate for the two girls, considering the number of beautiful designer shoes Parker has amassed as a result of playing “Sex and the City“‘s Carrie Bradshaw since the late ‘90s.

My personal shoe collection isn’t much, and I’m not sure future daughters of mine would be thrilled if I saved a battered pair of London Sole ballet flats for them. They would, however, have fun going through my jewelry box and piling on the diverse assortment of bangle bracelets I’ve collected—from fancy to 50-cent—along with tying the million and one scarves I own around their necks. What from your closet will you pass down to your daughters (real or hypothetical)?

Looks like someone has been dipping into the unflattering trend pool of yore. Leighton Meester was spotted on the set of “Gossip Girl” making a change from what appears to be the high heels of her costume to a pair of Uggs on her break. (Unless Blair has some scene where she’s trying to be ironic? Doubtful.) Seems everyone except for Jessica Simpson has put Uggs on the banned fashions list, and we know a lot of girls who wouldn’t be caught dead in the winter boots (we really would have thought Leighton would be in that group).

But, you gotta admit ... they are super warm and comfy. Like walking on clouds! So come clean—do you still have those pink Uggs circa 2003 in your closet? Break them out from time to time? [Um, yes, yes I do.—Editor] In public? Blair would never!

Boots are expensive, so why not get the most out of every pair you own and switch up your look instantly with shoe jewelry! Wha? New York City jewelry designers Erica Chan and Tamar Wider have created a collection of footwear accessories called The 2 Bandits. The newest addition to the rather expansive collection is “Riders,” a line of adjustable leather and chain harnesses worn at the base of any boot—flat boot, bootie, shoetie, heeled boot, etc. And 2 Bandits isn’t just limited to chains; they also have beaded and fabric adornments for boots, including the Native American-inspired “Cherokee,” the boho-inspired “Edie,” the “Moondance,” the “Santa Fe”— the list goes on and on. So, yeah, my plain black riding boots can have a second (and third, and fourth) life. Eh, ya gotta kind of love that. [Cool Hunting]

Check it: Nike special-edition Air Max sneaks, featuring Andy Warhol’s iconic pop art imagery of Marilyn Monroe. [Inventor Spot]

I don’t know whether to throw up or just gag. Short boots made from horse hooves. Egads. [Buzzfeed]

When TOMS Shoes first came out, I thought they looked weird and wouldn’t put on a pair to save my life (or even to help charitably put shoes on a child, as Toms does with every purchase). But this fall, they released a lace-up version that comes in various wool and canvas fabrics. Finally, a pair of TOMS for me! Thankfully, come spring, Toms will continue offering its lace-up Cordones in warm-weather-friendly canvas stripes and plaids. I’m not sure how I feel about the new striped wedge heels (photo after the jump), but with the right Audrey Hepburn in “Roman Holiday” outfit, I could be sold. Question though: TOMS isn’t giving this style to children in need, right? [Issuu, HuffPo]

It was inevitable that Madonna‘s eldest, Lourdes Ciccone Leon, would be a style icon by the time she became a teenager. Well, now we know what’s in the closet of the 13-year-old celebuspawn, thanks to the tell-tale red soles of Christian Louboutin shoes, which tend to retail at about $600 per pair. Here, Lourdes was recently spotted wearing a pair of these must-have studded flats. Of course, the children of celebrities are naturally predisposed to be well-dressed in luxury goods, and they’re some damn lucky kids. But for the rest of the “normal” world, at what age should girls be allowed to wear high-end designer labels? It seems like more and more, there’s a growing culture of teens and pre-teens who are just really, really well-dressed. Honestly, it does make us a little jealous. When we were 13 years old, we would have given anything to live in Cher Horowitz’s closet. How old were you when you started wearing more high-end goods? At what age is it appropriate (if any) for the younger set to start sporting Louboutins, Chanel purses, or whatever happens to be hot these days on Shopbop? [Style Frizz]

I very recently bought a pair of Christian Louboutin heels for $85 at a sample sale—ah-mazing deal, right? Well, turns out, not so much. They’re a size too small and perilously high, way too high for my heel-walking abilities. But, yeah, I still went ahead and bought them even though I could barely walk around the try-on area with them on (let alone a city sidewalk). Still, I love them and because of that adoration, I actually wore them out last weekend. Bad move. I had to go home about an hour after I arrived due to the fact that I was hobbling, painfully hobbling, around. I’m going to get them stretched a half size, but I am certainly not the only person out there who’s bought and never worn a pair of shoes ...