The moment has finally come. After getting your required amount of gallantry and booze, you’re going home with the new guy. But what will his place look like? We all spend the most at-home time in the bedroom, especially on that sexy sorta night. So, just like his underwear style, his sheet set can be really telling. Is your man a full-fledged flannel softie, an Egyptian cotton king, or perhaps even a bold bed-in-a-bag kind of guy? Find out how he’s exposing himself, before you even take off his pants.

Pillow talk is one of those magical occurrences that only happens so often; it’s fleeting, just like dreams. If anyone knows anything about the subject, it’s Miranda July, the director and performance artist whose beautiful indie film, “Me And You And Everyone We Know” seemed, if just for a moment, to make everyone consider the artistic awkwardness of love.

If you’re a fan, check out July’s recent work, which you can bring into your own home. A set of two pillowcases, one has a poignant image with the words, “Here you will dream of endless kissing.” The other, which reads, “Here you will dream of people you admire exposing your fraudulence,” sounds more like a nightmare, but knowing July, there’s probably meant to be ambiguity in words just as there is in dreams. Or vice versa. [$65, ThirdDrawerDown.com]

Not long ago, we told you about how American Apparel introduced a new line of jersey bedding. My first thought was innnn-teresting. Next brainwave: Why the hell do I want a set of jersey sheets? Sure, jersey sheets (t-shirt sheets for those not trolling the aisles of Bed, Bath & Beyond on their Sunday mornings) are insanely affordable and can feel (when they’re new) like the inside of a just-purchased sweatshirt before the first wash—but I just can’t get into them. For two reasons…

American Apparel has been a mecca of hipster clothes since it debuted more than 10 years ago. But how much longer can people continue to wear deep V-neck shirts, gold lamé leggings, and hot pants? The company seems to know that the demand for these products could wane, so they’ve been adding new items to their stable lately. First it was butt-less tights, then scrunchies, and now the company is selling sheet sets. If AA is getting into the home decor business, we have a few ideas for what else they could make with their fabrics of choice.

Left foot blue! This bed sheet (about $40, imported from England) lets you play an adults-only version of Twister. Stretch first. [Karmasheetra.com]