Tag Archives: sexual issues

How Not To Respond When Your Partner Doesn’t Hit The Big O

“You didn’t finish, did you?” he asked.

“No,” I said.

I’ve lied before, but I’m trying to wean myself away from it. Lying only adds a layer of mental unease to any lingering physical dissatisfaction I might be feeling, and assuaging false pride rarely seems like a good deal. The dishonesty (to myself) leaves a bad taste in my mouth; if he bothered to ask, doesn’t he want the truth? Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “My New Husband Refuses To Sleep With Me”

I am a young woman in my mid-20s. I started dating my husband when I was 18. We were in a long-distance relationship, but decided to get married this year, and I left the U.S. to be with him. Before we were married, we had a great sex life. Now that I am here, he says he isn’t sexually attracted to me anymore. This may be understandable if I’d gained a lot of weight or my appearance had changed dramatically, but it hasn’t. (I actually LOST nearly 100 lbs. a few years ago). At first, he thought that that he didn’t love me anymore, but we’ve talked extensively about it and he says he does love me, but not sexually … he loves me like a family member, etc. He claims not to be attracted to any other women. For the record, he has extensive anxiety issues, as well as being overweight, etc. We’ve talked to his doctor, who suggests both counseling and testing to see if he has physical problems. He refuses both of these. I love him more than anything and I gave up everything to be with him, but I’ve become extremely depressed and discouraged, being so far from friends or family, with a husband who doesn’t seem to want to be a husband. I try to hide this from everyone, since my husband has already suggested that I would be happier elsewhere and I don’t want my family and friends to worry about something they have no control over. Help me save our marriage! — Sexless Bride

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Dear Wendy: “My Boyfriend Has Erectile Dysfunction”

I’ve been dating this guy for the past six months and he’s been experiencing some problems with erectile dysfunction ever since we started having sex, about two months ago. He’s in his mid-20s and obviously not the target demographic, so it’s hit him very hard and really damaged his self-confidence. He’s been to the doctor and has an appointment with a specialist in a couple of weeks. I’ve really tried to be supportive and understanding about the whole thing, but the nature of our relationship has changed. We still have sexual contact, even if he doesn’t necessarily get off or get hard. We work part-time together and when I see him at work, he’s very attentive, but the problem is he rarely contacts me anymore outside of work and when he does he says strange things like “I don’t deserve you,” or “I miss you,” but doesn’t ask to see me until I bring it up. We see each other once a week at most at the moment, but he used to want to see me all the time. I’m bloody confused about what to do. I’ve backed off quite a bit to give him some space but I don’t want to get hurt over this. — ED Doesn’t Spell END

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7 Signs That Have Nothing To Do With Being Sexually Unsatisfied

Is there anything more fragile than a male ego? More egocentric than an insecure man? Have you ever noticed how easy it is for a guy who’s unsure of himself to make everything about him and his inability to please you or meet your expectations? Take this article in Men’s Health, for example, called “10 Signs She’s Unsatisfied.” That there’s even an article by that title is ridiculous already. Aren’t the signs pretty obvious? Do they really need to be spelled out? If we let out a frustrated sigh and roll over in bed, jerking the blankets with us, leaving our man with nothing but a cold shoulder to cuddle up against, chances are we’re pretty “unsatisfied.” (See the visual above!) But the article doesn’t say anything about that. No, in true Men’s Health fashion, the article includes a bunch of ambiguous “signs” that mostly have nothing to do with being unsatisfied. After the jump, my seven favorite. Keep reading »

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