Rapists will pretty much use any excuse to avoid taking responsibility for their rapes, usually by blaming it on their victim. She was wearing a short skirt. She was passed out drunk. She had flirted with him. A-n-y-thing to avoid responsibility for his own actions. So I should not be surprised that an accused rapist in New York City is blaming his alleged sexual assault and physical attack on a 21-year-old woman on mind-erasing Four Loko drinks. Keep reading »
Angie Epifano is a former student of the class of 2014 at Amherst College. This piece is cross-posted with permission from The Amherst Student.
When you’re being raped time does not stop. Time does not speed up and jump ahead like it does when you are with friends. Instead, time becomes your nemesis; it slows to such an excruciating pace that every second becomes an hour, every minute a year, and the rape becomes a lifetime.
On May 25, 2011, I was raped by an acquaintance in Crossett Dormitory on Amherst College campus.
Some nights I can still hear the sounds of his roommates on the other side of the door, unknowingly talking and joking as I was held down; it is far from a pleasant wakeup call.
I had always fancied myself a strong, no-nonsense woman, whose intense independence was cultivated by 17 harrowing years of emotional abuse in my backwoods home. May 25th temporarily shattered that self-image and left me feeling like the broken victim that I had never wanted to be.
Everything I had believed myself to be was gone in 30 minutes. Keep reading »
Victim Blaming 101: Of course she wasn’t raped — she’s just lying! Or drunk! Or both!
Sadly, victim blaming is in full swing with the “pizza boy rapist,” a 16-year-old boy who allegedly raped a 35-year-old woman in her New York City apartment. Cesar Lucas was delivering a pizza on Saturday night on the Upper West Side and was let into the building by a doorman; after he delivered his pizza, he told police that he started turning the knobs of doors in other apartments. When he found one that was open, he entered and climbed on top of a sleeping woman while her seven-year-old child slept nearby. The victim told the Post he covered her mouth and told her to be quiet. Before he left, he apologized and stole the woman’s iPhone and $20 from a wallet.
The young man confessed to police that he raped her and sickeningly explained that he was “horny.” But now his mother is blabbing to The New York Post and suggesting the alleged victim was “drunk.” Because you know how us ladies get when we’ve been drinking: we invite random teenage pizza delivery boys into our apartments, have consensual sex while our child is sleeping on the same bed, and then give them our iPhones as a farewell gift! Keep reading »
“The Vagina Monologues” playwright and global anti-sexual violence activist Eve Ensler debuted a new campaign today called One Billion Rising. This short film — powerfully done, but with some NSFW violent imagery — shows just some of the acts of violence that women worldwide endure on a daily basis. On February 14, activists worldwide will hold events for One Billion Rising and remember the one in three women worldwide who will be subject to rape or abuse in her lifetime. Ensler, who is also behind the V-Day celebration every Feb. 14th, where “Monologues” is staged around the country to raise money for anti-sexual violence resources, is embarking on a worldwide trip. She’ll hit up Peru, Mexico, India, China, Philippines, Britain, France, and the Democratic Republic of Congo before coming to New York City for V-Day. You can learn more about the campaign and find events in your country here. Rise up! [One Billion Rising]
Idea: anytime a religious conservative Republican wants to use the word “rape” in public, he or she should run it through a publicist first. The wife of Rep. Todd Akin, the politician who last month questioned whether rape is “legitimate rape” and claimed women’s bodies reject sperm during a sexual assault to keep them from getting pregnant, has added her voice to the WTF-Are-You-Thinking chorus. Keep reading »
More than half of all sexual assaults are never reported to the police and 97 percent of rapists will never spend a day in jail. These statistics from the Rape Abuse & Incest National Network are horrifying — but they also remind us how incredible 16-year-old Shania Gray of Texas was. The high school junior reported her alleged statutory rape to police and was scheduled to go to trial next month to try and put her alleged rapist, Franklin B. Davis behind bars.
Tragically, Shania was murdered by Davis before she ever had a chance to testify against him. Keep reading »
I was horrified to read this week that a 73-year-old woman was raped in broad daylight in Central Park.
Read that again, let it sink in: a 73-year-old woman was raped in broad daylight in Central Park.
According to news reports, the woman goes to Central Park every day and sits on a bench, birdwatching. Last week she witnessed a man in the bushes masturbating, so she took his picture — presumably to show to police. He came up to her after being photographed and demanded she hand over the film, but she refused.
Then Tuesday around noon, she was back in the park and the same man confronted her, asked “You remember me?” and then savagely beat and raped her, vaginally and rectally. He ran off with her bag, which contained her camera, and tried to steal her watch, too. The elderly victim was discovered lying in the ground by a fellow birdwatcher, who called 911. (He was arrested yesterday.) Keep reading »
Don’t go near football players. Don’t trust police officers. Don’t be in or around your own home. Don’t go to Harvard. Don’t drink or go to school dances. And never, never change your mind about having sex if you’ve already said you want to bone. All these and many other victim-blaming tips every woman needs are helpfully collected by the writer Kate Harding on Don’t Get Raped, which is filled with links to news articles about our shitty blame-the-victim-not-the-assailant rape culture. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to learn to how do my own Pap smear because I apparently can’t go to the gynecologist without getting raped. [VictimBlaming.Tumblr.com]
Before my big move to college last year, I can’t tell you how many times my mother told me how I had watch my drink at all times while out with my friends. My mom had good reason to be badgering me with this crucial piece of advice: according to the U.S. Department of Justice, a woman is sexually assaulted every two minutes. Not surprisingly, there is a market for anti-date rape products … such as the first reusable anti-date rape straw. Keep reading »