Here are two things I never expected to be told in the same breath: “You’re so skinny! This will look cute on you,” and “I’m pretty sure you’re lying about that time your dad molested you.”
Nine months ago, I confronted my father about sexually abusing me as a child. Since then, my communication with my family has been limited, and it caught me off-guard when, just two weeks ago, my aunt invited me to meet her for lunch. I impulsively agreed, and initially, we started on the right note. After a few minutes of polite pleasantries, she handed me a gift bag. Inside, I found a hand-me-down Ann Taylor blazer with the tags still on (“I love the pattern, but it just doesn’t fit me”) and a copy of Meredith Maran’s My Lie: A True Story of False Memory (“I learned so much from this book. It’s amazing how unreliable our memories are, don’t you think?”). Never before had I felt so flattered and insulted all at once. Keep reading »
“The statements I made and repeated online and elsewhere over the past six months accusing Conor Oberst of raping me are 100 percent false. I made up those lies about him to get attention while I was going through a difficult period in my life and trying to cope with my son’s illness. I publicly retract my statements about Conor Oberst, and sincerely apologize to him, his family, and his fans for writing such awful things about him. I realize that my actions were wrong and could undermine the claims of actual sexual assault victims and for that I also apologize. I’m truly sorry for all the pain that I caused.”
This is a statement released by Joanie Faircloth, a North Carolina woman who last year, in the comments section of an xoJane article, accused Bright Eyes singer Conor Oberst of raping her when she was 16. (The comments have since been deleted.) Oberst has always denied the allegations; in February, he sued Faircloth for libel. According to the statement, she contacted Oberst’s lawyers today with this notarized recant. Well, shit. [SPIN] [Photo: Getty]
I woke up one morning last week to my Twitter in an uproar. That’s reasonably common in my world, as many of the people I follow are marginalized and there’s a lot to be angry about. Turns out that the FBI has seized MyRedbook, a California site where masseuses and escorts could advertise for clients for free, and arrested two people, Eric Omuro and Annmarie Lanoce, in connection to “using the mail and the Internet to facilitate prostitution” as well as money laundering under several aliases.
As of right now it’s not entirely clear if those arrests were the main focus of the sting, or if there will be more upcoming. It’s terrifying to many people close to me, who used MyRedbook to advertise their erotic entertainment services because other options like Eros were too expensive or less trafficked by paying customers. We don’t really know what options sex workers who had profiles up on MyRedbook have to protect themselves from investigation. I’m among them, as I used to advertise on MyRedbook as a professional dominatrix. Keep reading »
It has the elements of so many sexual assault allegations before it: fraternity members, a lot of alcohol, football players, freshman girls. And like too many other stories about sexual assault, this one also includes a university that failed a sexual assault victim and allowed campus rapists to get off scot-free.
This weekend, The New York Times published a gut-punch of a piece (on their front page, in fact) about a young woman called Anna who is a student at Hobart & William Smith, a college in upstate New York. During her first few weeks of college, Anna was sexually assaulted while drunk by several football players on the night of a frat party. After Anna sent texts that she was afraid, a friend found her drunkenly bent over a pool table, face down, surrounded by six or seven football players, including one right behind her who had his pants down. Keep reading »
“Everybody needs a day off, everybody needs the right to say ‘hey, you know what I need a minute to breathe. I want to bring my family to the movies without 30 motherfuckers following me. Everybody here, they like sex right? Sex is great when you and your partner be like ‘hey, this is what we both want to do.’ But if one of those people don’t want to do that, what does that constitute, that’s called rape. That is called violation.”
Add Kanye West to the list of celebrities who need better analogies to describe invasions into their personal life which come with fame. This is what Kanye said onstage yesterday at the Wireless Festival in Birmingham, UK, and well, do I really need to say more? Much like when Charlize Theron compared Googling herself with “feeling raped,” the public is snapping back at Kanye — quite rightly. Think of another analogy, celebs. [Mirror UK] [Photo: Fame/Flynet]
The good news: 29-year-old Lee Setford has been jailed for five years after a jury found him guilty of raping a drunk woman passed out on his couch. The bad news: the judge in the case, Michael Mettyear, is really sad about it and had the nerve to offer Setford some consoling words after the verdict was read that reenforce dangerous myths about sexual assault. Namely, that Setford isn’t a “classic rapist” — are there also avant garde rapists and mod rapists and sporty rapists? — and that it’s a shame he didn’t just plead guilty so he could get a lesser sentence. Yes, seriously. Keep reading »
When three students at James Madison University sexually assaulted a classmate on tape, their punishment was expulsion – after they graduated. Yes, really. JMU, along with 55 other schools, are under investigation for their mistreatment of on-campus assault cases. Other recent absurd assault punishments have included 30-day suspensions and book report assignments. Jon Stewart was just as appalled by that as the rest of us, so he got a real about the dismal state of affairs by bringing in “Daily Show” correspondents Jessica Williams and Jordan Klepper to offer some safety tips to students. [TIME]