“You just don’t know how to get me off,” M. snapped.
Humiliated, tears immediately sprang into my eyes. Every guy I had dated or hooked up with had always been more than pleased with our sex life. M. had always had a problem getting and staying hard. But now that I was confronting him, he was blaming it on me. Once M. became erect, he would stay that way for a while until he lost steam and went limp. As for having an orgasm, it was relegated to a once in a while event. We would cheer as though he was a toddler who managed to make it to the toilet to pee.
In the film “Don Jon,” Joseph Gordon-Levitt plays a man who is so addicted to porn he cannot enjoy sex with a real woman. Just like the protagonist, M. watched porn every day. Scared of what the answer may be, I began to wonder, Was porn the problem? In pop culture, porn is often seen as an affirmation of masculinity. The idea of porn addiction always seemed nebulous at best, something invented by the religious right. I assumed most guys watched it from time to time, but it never occurred to me that my partner could actually be addicted to it. Until it happened to me. Keep reading »
Before Tiger Woods gave his celebrity endorsement to sex addiction, we debated whether it’s an easy excuse or a mental health issue. But now it seems more people are treating it as a serious condition. Sex addiction has gone mainstream in movies like “Shame” and now “Thanks For Sharing,” out today.
We already took a look inside sex rehab clinics to find out what to expect when you’re reforming, but here are seven facts about sex addiction you might not have been aware of already. Read more at Tres Sugar…
Know a teen who’s hooked on porn? The Oxbow Academy, a boot-camp style facility in Utah, is treating teenagers with pornography addictions by using holistic therapy, banning phones, and insisting on lie detector tests, the Daily Mirror reports. Dubbed the Porn School, Oxbow charges heavily—nearly $9,000 a month—but is trying to tackle a problem that increasingly afflicts those who can’t refuse the easy access, experts say. Read more…
What did Tiger Woods learn from his stint in sex addiction rehab? Don’t bang porn stars or strippers — or anyone, for that matter — unless you honestly love ‘em. In an upcoming tell-all, The Big Miss, Tiger’s ex swing coach Hank Haney says the golfer told him of him recovery, “For the rest of my life I can’t have sex with someone unless I genuinely feel something for them. If I do, I’m putting myself in jeopardy.” I find that conclusion to be damn hilarious and unbelievable. Tiger, it’s not that I don’t think you didn’t learn your lesson after the public flogging you received following your infidelities, it’s just that you just don’t seem like the kind of guy I would trust to love anybody except for yourself. Sure, go ahead and think I am being judgmental, but I am not the only person to share these sentiments. In his book, Haney paints the golf star as, well, an ASS. Haney claims that Tiger treats everyone around him like crap. Supposedly, when he’s out to dinner with anyone (including his ex-wife Elin) and has finished eating his food, he gets up and leaves without saying anything, expecting others to obediently follow. He also plays childish pranks on other golfers and refuses to sign autographs for even little kids! A word to the wise: Mr.Woods, don’t make any promises you can’t keep — and just sign your damn name already. [NY Post]
“I think we’ve gotten to the point in our culture where we’re all sex addicts, literally. We have equated happiness in life with as many orgasms as you can possibly pack in, regardless of where it is that you deposit your love interest … It’s just dehumanizing. And I have to honestly say, I think this era of porn is at least partially responsible for it. Where is the anticipation and the personalization? It’s all pre-fab now. You have these images coming at you unannounced and unsolicited. It just gets to be so plastic and phony to me. Maybe men respond to that. But is it really better than an experience with a real life girl that he cares about? It’s an exploitation of the poor male’s libidos. Poor babies, they can’t control themselves … I just imagine them sitting in front of their computers, completely annihilated. They haven’t done anything, they don’t have a job, they barely have ambition anymore. And it makes for laziness and a not very good sex partner. Do they know how to negotiate something that isn’t pre-fab and injected directly into their brain? … I don’t care if I’m becoming one of those old fogies who says, ‘Back in my day we didn’t have to hear about sex all the time.’ Can you imagine? My fantasies were all made up on my own. They’re ruining us with all the explanations and the graphicness. Nobody remembers what it’s like to be left to form your own ideas about what’s erotic and sexual. We’re not allowed any individuality. I thought that was the fun of the whole thing. It’s my fantasy. I didn’t pick it off the Internet somewhere. It’s my fantasy.”
– Raquel Welch shares her thoughts on porn in Men’s Health. There’s a lot to respond to here. I agree with what she’s saying about erotic individuality. But that’s where I stop agreeing with her. We’re all sex addicts? Really? Keep reading »