Tag Archives: semen

Woman Claims Yogurt Sample Tasted Like Semen

Amelia McDonell-ParryJanuary 28, 2011 //
yogurt photo

Hello. Are you eating? Maybe stop for a second. Especially if you are eating yogurt. So, a woman in Albuquerque, New Mexico, called the police because she said a yogurt sample she was given at her local grocery store “tasted like bodily fluids” aka semen. Police arrested Sunflower Market employee Anthony Garcia, 31, on outstanding bench warrants, but are currently conducting lab tests on the yogurt in question to find out if it does indeed contain ejaculate — or just tastes like it. Speaking of… Keep reading »

Nude Photo Leaked Of Ke$ha Covered In, Um, Masculine Essence

Jessica WakemanJuly 7, 2010 //

Satisfied with the devil’s handiwork he accomplished with poor Miley, Perez Hilton has moved on to his next victim: Ke$ha. Perez just posted a nude photo of Ke$ha allegedly covered in, shall we say, ambrosia of man. I took out my spectacles and I don’t see a single thing on her: She just looks like her usual self, lying back and looking crunked. (We can’t/won’t link to the photo since, duh, we hate him. Also, we are using that blue-haired photo of him in perpetuity.)

Leave it to Perez and his super-sperm-eyes that can sense DNA on nubile young pop stars. (P.S. Thanks, John DeVore, for the dirty euphemisms!) Keep reading »

Want To Meet The Love Of Your Life And Get Pregnant? Here’s How.

Susannah BreslinApril 16, 2010 //

This video? It blew my mind. So to speak! Seriously, though. Three women — Carey Goldberg, Beth Jones, and Pamela Ferdinand — find themselves “of a certain age,” childless, and partner-less. Finally, one decides she’s tired of waiting around for Mr. Right. So, she orders herself some sperm from the sperm bank. Right when the order shows up, BAM, she meets a guy and gets pregnant. But then her friend is partner-less and childless. So, the first woman decides to give the second woman her sperm. Before the second woman can use it, BAM, she meets a guy and gets pregnant. But then there’s their third friend, who’s partner-less and childless. So, the second woman gives the third woman the sperm, and — well, you can probably guess the rest. So many happy endings, they wrote a book about it: Three Wishes: A True Story of Good Friends, Crushing Heartbreak, and Astonishing Luck on Our Way to Love and Motherhood. Who’s the dude with the super-sperm? Inquiring minds want to know. [BuzzFeed] Keep reading »

Semen 101

Kate Torgovnick/Kate-Book.comFebruary 8, 2010 //

Thanks to BuzzFeed for providing us with more information than we ever needed to know about sperm, in handy infographic format. Some nuggets of info we’ve gleaned: a serving size (one teaspoon) contains 20 calories and the average speed of ejaculation is 31 miles per hour. Learn lots more after the jump. Keep reading »

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