Tag Archives: santa claus

Watch “Even Santa Poops,” PooPourri’s Hilariously Punny Christmas Video

It's The Ghost Of Christmas Ass

You gotta go when you gotta go, even if you’re Santa Claus. And this year, St. Nick got caught with his pants down. PooPourri, a pre-poo spray that helps eliminate stinky odors, has come up with a clever, hilarious Christmas video to let everybody know that no matter who you are or where you find yourself when nature calls, you should be armed and ready to drop a deuce, or in Santa’s case, “to make your dingleberries smell like jingle-berries.” Check out the video to watch two little girls chastise Santa for making their house smell like “a gingerbread manslaughter.”

Most Americans Want To Vastly Either Over- Or Under-Pay Santa Claus

Insure.com figured out a salary for Santa Claus based on his tasks — engineering (managing toy production), auditing (seeing who’s naughty or nice), and piloting chief (flying around his pack of reindeer) among them — and it came out to around $140,000 a year. Excuse me, that’s not accounting for stealth operations. It costs a lot to hire someone who’s capable of landing a sleigh on a roof, breaking into a home, depositing goods, and only leaving traces of cookies behind without making any noise. Multiply that by the number of houses he has to enter and you’ve got yourself a salary well above $140,000, my friend. Keep reading »

Fox News Host Megyn Kelly Believes In (White) Santa Claus

Fox News Host Megyn Kelly Believes In (White) Santa Claus
"Santa just is white."

Earlier this week, Slate.com columnist Aisha Harris wrote a somewhat tongue-in-cheek piece arguing that Santa Claus needed a makeover. Instead of always being depicted as a jolly, fat, white man, Santa Claus should be a penguin. Harris wrote about growing up as a Black child and seeing two versions of Santa — on TV and at school, Santa was white, but at home, the Santa who decorated her house (and delivered presents) at Christmastime was Black, just like her. Harris described how this omnipresent white figure made her feel as a child:

I remember feeling slightly ashamed that our black Santa wasn’t the “real thing.” Because when you’re a kid and you’re inundated with the imagery of a pale seasonal visitor—and you notice that even some black families decorate their houses with white Santas—you’re likely to accept the consensus view, despite your parents’ noble intentions.

Depicting Santa as an animal, Harris argued, “could spare millions of nonwhite kids the insecurity and shame that I remember from childhood.” She continued: Keep reading »

Poor Santa! Miley Cyrus Twerks On Father Christmas

Poor Santa! Miley Cyrus Twerks On Father Christmas
Ho Ho Ho!

I believe Miley has tried to make a name for herself lately by being that girl you never know what to expect from. Except, we’ve come to know exactly what to expect from Miley and that is twerking. Twerking on everything. So no one should be the slightest bit surprised that Miley twerked on Santa at KIIS FM’s annual Jingle Ball over the weekend. But forget feeling sorry for Santa — this one’s young, drunk, probably horny and doesn’t seem to mind Miley’s twerking one bit. No word on what Mrs. Claus thinks, however. [Jezebel]

12 Days Of Catsmas: Day 4

On The 1st Day Of Catsmus
...my true love gave to me ...12 cats wearing Santa beards. Read More »
On The 2nd Day Of Catsmus
...my true love gave to me ... 11 pups in Christmas sweaters. Read More »
One The 3rd Day Of Catsmus
...my true love gave to me, 10 cats wearing antlers! Read More »

On the fourth day of Catsmas, my true love gave to me …

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8 Santa-Inspired Sex Acts For A Very Merry Christmas (NSFW)

Happy Holidays!
The Frisky is here for you for this holiday season. Need gift ideas? Moral support? Read More »

Ho, ho, ho! Who would have thought that jolly ‘ol Saint Nick would inspire anything remotely sexual? Just a quick sleigh ride through the Urban Dictionary and we’ve discovered that Santa is sliding down chimneys and into bedrooms. This Christmas, you may want to stuff one of these in your partner’s stocking. Depending on how naughty or nice they’ve been…

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