Nicholas Sparks, supposed romance expert and author of sappy, formulaic novels-turned-movies like “The Notebook” and “A Walk To Remember” is separating from his wife Cathy and thus has effectively failed at love. Dude, you had one job. The pair has been married for 25 years. They have five children, who am I super bummed out for and who will probably have zero faith in love after comparing their dad’s books to their parents’ actual fate. Sparks has raved about Cathy in the press over the years, claiming she served as inspiration for many of the female characters in his work (like Rachel McAdams’ character in “The Notebook” and Miley Cyrus’ in “The Last Song”) and that he knew within days of meeting her that he’d marry her. The two met on Sparks’ college spring break and sent each other over a hundred love letters during their first few months together. He told HuffPost Live in 2013 that he “married a woman who loves a lot” and that “every female character I’ve ever crafted is a lot like my wife. They’re intelligent and loyal, they’re funny. And most of all, they’re not wishy-washy women. They’re good, solid women.” Well, that changed abruptly. Keep reading »
So, I know I’m a killjoy. I know that people like to say cute things to each other when they’re in love because those things sound good whether or not they make any sense. But I’ve heard a few too rational people saying gross, unthinking things about their SO’s lately, and it makes me fear for their sense.
My boyfriend is a big dope, and I instituted a rule a long time ago that if he was going to say anything brainlessly dramatic or sentimental to me, he had to say it in a dramatic whisper so I could laugh at it. I just don’t like saying or being told things that are not literally true for the sake of it sounding loving, when expressing love truthfully is so much harder but so much better. Here’s a list of some whisper-worthy, saccharine, and not-very accurate gushiness that just needs to stop happening in the way we talk about our partners. Keep reading »
Researchers have found evidence that watching rom-coms and sitcoms impact our views on love. TV seems to shape our view of reality in every other realm of life, so I’m not exactly shocked it’s also true for romance.
Why Dave Is Still Single, a study by University of Michigan researchers, asked participants how frequently they watch rom-coms, marriage-themed reality shows and sitcoms.They discovered that participants who watch a lot of rom-coms and romantic reality shows were more likely to believe in things like love at first sight and “The One” – you know, the stuff that keeps us forever alone because we’re stubbornly waiting for some ever-elusive meet cute with a Ken doll that will never arrive. These participants were more likely to agree with phrases like “My ‘true love’ will be nearly perfect” or the concept that they’d know immediately if their significant other was right for them. Keep reading »
We’re pretty intrigued by this photo series project called “Feminism is not a means to just justify self entitlement,” in which signs held by a man and a woman clarify what it can mean to be in a relationship while being a feminist. I know I’ve definitely had moments where I’ve gotten caught up in where feminism fit within traditional dating rituals; this series explains some points of confusion about gender roles and simply being a loving partner.
Do these pictures resonate with you or do you feel like they already go without saying? I find myself leaning in both ways — these are important points that some people don’t understand, but I would hope a reasonably thoughtful person doesn’t need the difference between chivalry and oppression to be spelled out. I’d love your thoughts. [Jezebel, Imgur]
Quick! It’s Valentine’s Day! If you are planning to run to CVS for a schmoopy card and a box of chocolates during your lunch hour, you are shit out of luck, my friends. That place is going to look like a tornado ripped through it. How about an e-card instead? How about a free e-card instead? You won’t look cheap, you’ll look thrifty. Here’s four different sites with diverse cards for all different types of relationships you have this Valentine’s Day. Send one to your mom! And your best friend! And me!
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I consider myself a romantic and love it when the person I’m crushing on, dating, or seriously involved with puts forth an effort to woo me. Seriously, nothing will make my panties drop faster than a guy giving me a bouquet of gorgeous peonies, my favorite flower. But that’s about as traditionally romantic as my wooing tastes go. It’s not that I’m high maintenance; it’s just that most traditional “romantic” gestures strike me as fake and over-the-top, or just plain irritate and embarrass me. Like, in all my years hate-watching “The Bachelor,” I don’t think I’ve ever thought, Oh man, I wish someone would take me on a fairytale date like this! And, in speaking to my friends, it turns out that I’m not alone. So fellas, if you’re thinking about how to woo your special lady this Valentine’s Day (or any day, really, as Valentine’s Day as a concept is about as fake romantic as they come), I suggest nixing these seven supposedly swoon-worthy gestures in favor of something more personal and creative.
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