Ever have a bad day? Maybe someone cut you off on the way to work, your favorite show was canceled, the last cookie in the jar was covered in mold, or you broke a bone on vacation (sigh, that would be me). Whatever it is, it’s healthy to acknowledge what’s bothering you, but don’t linger there too long. Take a few minutes to sing the blues and move on, or you may find yourself hosting a sad, pathetic pity party for one. Keep reading »
Over the weekend, a friend of mine was telling me that she was headed out to run some errands recently when her husband chimed in, “Hey, I think I’ll come with you.” Normally very open to any help she can get while grocery shopping, my friend was shocked when instead of replying, “Sure!”, she found herself giving her husband a long list of logical reasons why he should stay home. “And then it hit me,” she said, “I was really looking forward to being by myself that day — listening to my music in the car, zoning out at the store, taking my time. I just didn’t know how to say, ‘I really want to be alone right now’ so I made up all these excuses instead.”
As weird as it might sound, I knew exactly how she felt. When you’re in a serious relationship, spending time together and getting enough quality alone time is a constant balancing act. It can be tough to ask for alone time when you need it, but sometimes it’s even tougher to figure out when you need alone time, period. Here are a few signs that you might need to schedule a solo day, ASAP… Keep reading »
The other day I saw clickbait on the Internet called something like “10 Things You Find In Every Graduation Speech.” I didn’t click, but the headline stuck in my mind. Graduation is supposed to be a celebration of your hard work, a launch into the adult working world. A graduation speaker is someone chosen to offer wisdom and insight into this momentous rite of passage. Have graduation speeches really gotten so formulaic that they can slapped together with GIFs on BuzzFeed? (I guess they must? I only graduated nine years ago and I don’t even remember who my speaker was or what she said.)
I’ve been thinking about this lately because today, our editorial assistant Claire is graduating from college. Yesterday afternoon, we broke out the pink booze and mini eclairs to toast to no more finals and 10-page papers. As The Frisky staff sat around — all of us between five to 15 years out of college — we all had advice for Claire about being launched into the grownup world. Some of it was practical. Some of it was financial. All of it was honest and most assuredly more useful than whatever’s being said about “character” and “grit” and “passion” at graduations across the land this week. Those things are important, too, but they’re so vague you can make a GIFicle about them.
It made me wish I was the sort of “important person” who could be asked to give a commencement address. Seeing as I’m not an famous actor or a famous editor or really anyone important in particular, I don’t really see that happening. So for Claire, and for everyone else who may or may not have deeper thoughts on life than Charlie Day from “It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia,” here’s what I would say if someone asked me to give a commencement speech. Keep reading »
What could possibly be better than sex with the one you love? Well, according to science, a lot of things really.
Most recently a French study revealed what 74 percent of women would rather be doing than getting it on. What other things are triggering “not tonight, honey” excuses from both men and women? See the scientifically-proven, better-than-sex activities on YourTango…
Being in a long-term relationship is all about sharing. You share your time, your living space, your most intimate secrets, your friends, your life. When you strike a nice balance in the sharing department, it feels easy and natural. When you share too much, your relationship can veer into codependent territory. When you share too little, your connection might feel cold and distant. The stakes are higher now, but basically, your preschool teacher knew what was up when she forced you to let Billy play with the toy truck in the sandbox: sharing is caring. Obviously every couple needs to figure out their own ideal sharing arrangement, but there are definitely some guidelines that apply to most everyone. With that in mind, here are a few things you should share with your partner, and a few things to keep for yourself. Keep reading »
Hey, guess what? I’m here with good news! Stop worrying about getting married.
I know this seems sudden. It’s only a normal Friday in May and you’re probably just living your own life. But let’s be honest with ourselves. We think about getting hitched all the time. We think about marriage with awe and a sense of wonder, the way we look at marriage on Pinterest; and the pretty lace, peonies with twine around them, engagement pictures with your honey gazing at you like he NEVER has before. We also think about marriage in a state of terror and panic. When is it going to happen to me? Why are engagements popping up everywhere on Facebook but avoiding my life like the modern-day plague? Read more on College Candy…
Nick and I were at a dinner party recently, and one of the couples there had the most annoying habit: whenever one of them was telling a story, the other would correct them constantly. And these weren’t major, necessary corrections like “no, silly, his death sentence was exonerated!”, they were trivial corrections about tiny, insignificant details, like the color of a car their mutual friend was driving, or if something happened in April instead of May. It was so bad that by the end of the night I wanted to scream, “Just let them tell the damn story!” This experience got me thinking about bad couple habits — the annoying habits that often manifest themselves when people get in relationships. What are they, and how do you fix them? Read on to find out! Keep reading »
Your relationship is also always changing in perceptible and imperceptible ways. Even the most rock solid union is in a state of flux. Like nature, relationships have seasons and rhythms. During each “season” you build a stronger union or drift apart. Your thoughts, words, attitudes and behaviors dictate the direction in which change moves. Are you headed toward more intimacy and closeness or away toward isolation and alienation? Read more on Your Tango…
“I just assumed that when I met my soulmate and fell in love, all of these annoying day to day things would fall into place.”
I’m on the phone with a friend of mine, who’s a couple years into a relationship that is overflowing with romance. Their pairing has everything: the meet-cute; the deep, spiritual connection; the sizzling sexual chemistry; the stimulating intellectual back and forth; the aligned life goals and values; the mutual belief that the other is the most amazing human to ever grace the Earth.
They’ve committed to a life together, they own a house, they’re very, very happy. There’s just one problem: they can’t for the life of them figure out how to plan their weekends. Her go-with-the-flow attitude clashes with his get-shit-done vibe and all of a sudden their dreamy love connection is imploding into a cranky spat about how long they’re going to spend at Home Depot and who hit the snooze button for the fourth time.
“I know we’re meant to be together,” she says, “so why can’t we figure this out?” Keep reading »
We all have pet peeves. We all have rage triggers. For some people, it’s loud chewing. For others, it’s people who point when they talk. But sometimes, even though our hearts race and our fists clench, we know we’re wrong. Or if not wrong, we know we’re overreacting. And it just doesn’t matter. We can’t help it. These things drive us nuts, and somehow knowing that we shouldn’t get upset only makes us more angry. Read more on Cracked…