This is our friend Tom. He’s a married guy with tons of relationship experience, and a skilled advice giver who’s here to answer all your pressing sex, dating and relationship questions. Have a query for Tom? Email him at firstname.lastname@example.org! All questions will be posted anonymously, unless otherwise requested.
Mr. Nice and I met in 2012. Our first date lasted 13 hours: incredible, as was every date after that. We’re both divorced: he’s 52 and I’m 46, each with two kids (his in college, mine in high school). We’ve kept the kids out of it, so neither has been to the others’ home.
About eight months in, he started to become withdrawn, calling less frequently in the evening. We were still going out several times a week (dinners, movies, etc.), but it was not the same.
I finally inquired, and he gave me this response: he moved a deceased friend’s wife and four kids into his house. The friend’s wife was going through cancer treatment, unable to work, had no family, and was on the verge of homelessness. He felt he had no option but to help. He went on to say there wasn’t anything going on between them (he volunteered info), and that he hadn’t it shared with me because he didn’t know how I would respond. He said he adored where we were relationship-wise and wanted to continue. (Eight months into dating, we weren’t having sex. Lots of heavy kissing and cuddling, even a few weekend get-aways in a shared bed, but no sex). We both agreed early on that sex complicates things and we really wanted to take it slow. Keep reading »
Do you fight with your significant other over the TV? Have you committed any of these TV sharing commandments? Learn the four rules of TV sharing on YourTango …
Shit happens. I’ve lost track of the number of married men I know who have lost their wedding bands. Many men, including my husband, have lost their bands within the first year of marriage. In fact, if you are a married and still have your original wedding band, I applaud you.
The reality is, most men are not used to wearing sentimental jewelry. Thus, generally speaking, they don’t exercise caution when wearing their wedding rings. They don’t consider removing their rings before swimming in the ocean. They are blissfully unaware that their fingers shrink in cold weather, making the ring looser. They have yet to develop a protective reflex, balling their fist to prevent the ring from slipping off the finger. But when the chances of a man losing his wedding band is high, the question becomes, “When you lose your ring, how do you tell your wife?” Here are some dos and don’ts… Keep reading »
Clarity often comes like a bolt of lightning out of the blue. It’s a shock that opens your eyes to a whole new perspective. A client of mine called hers a miracle. Mine was like waking up — the kind where you sit straight up, instantly awake, and look around, not recognizing where you are, even though it’s the bedroom you’ve slept in for years.
My bolt of lightning struck after nine years of marriage. I was having a reunion lunch with a very dear friend of mine from college. We had gone our separate ways and hadn’t been in touch since well before either of us had gotten married. It was one of those long, catch-up conversations where we tried to cram in as much as possible about the last ten years of our lives. And then it happened. I saw myself through his eyes. It was the old me that he was seeing. The girl I used to be when I was single, who loved traveling, seeing bands, curled up in a corner reading, or staying up late into the night in deep conversation with friends. It was a shock because I hadn’t recognized her. Read more on Your Tango…
While people may admit to having struggles in their relationships, including difficulty with intimacy, it is sometimes hard to admit that you struggle with love addiction. Learn how to recognizing the signs of love addiction and how to love yourself first on Your Tango…