Like conducting a job search, online dating is an exercise in patience, compatibility, and, sometimes, rejection. It’s not romantic, but to a certain degree, the search for a suitable partner is not unlike the job hunt. You use the internet to varying degrees of success, clicking and writing emails and then clicking some more, and sometimes, if the cards are in your favor and the stars align, you end up meeting a stranger in a public setting and make awkward small talk while wearing shoes that pinch your toes and more makeup than you would for a Tuesday. When it’s over, you’re euphoric or despondent, alternating between mapping out a future for yourself or envisioning waiting for an email that never arrives. You follow up, you wait, things usually don’t pan out. When you do find success, you realize that it came the way most things in life happen — organically, through people you know. Matched with destiny, your future trips happily towards the light.
This is the best case scenario, a situation that everybody assures you will happen, regardless of how dire it all looks. Keep reading »
No one likes rejection (duh!), but it happens to the best of us. And everyone has their own way of dealing with it. From denial to getting sassy, here are all your different options in the unfortunate case that you get let down by the person you’re into. Get clicking and choose your best reaction — tears not included. Read more on Tres Sugar…
The older I get, the better I become at listening to what my intuition is telling me. I haven’t always been able to read when something is “off” with a guy, but I’m figuring it out. And thank God.
Take this weekend. I’d been messaging for a couple days with a guy from an online dating website. Let’s call him Empty Profile. We’re calling him that because he had a mostly empty profile. He wrote a few brief lines about himself, which didn’t reveal much, but he did post several pictures of himself. We flirted back and forth and Empty Profile eventually asked me if I wanted to get drinks on Saturday night. Keep reading »
Hello there. You. Yes, you! I have something I would like to talk to you about.
It’s come up a couple of times recently and it’s gotten so irritating that I finally have to say something about it. I’m pretty sure you’re not even aware of what you’re doing or why it bothers me. So here it goes.
I would like you to ask me out on a freaking date. Keep reading »
I looked at his profile before I read the email he sent—a rookie online dating mistake. The guy in the photos looked highly attractive—green eyes, a shaved head, a strong, square jaw line, and an impeccable sense of style. In his answers to the cheesy profile questions, he managed to seem funny and charming. I had a good feeling as I finally opened the email he’d sent me.
“Hey gorgeous. Ran across your profile, and you are so my type it’s scary. Hope you don’t mind that I am picturing you naked. You into something casual? Think we’d have mind blowing sex.”
Keep reading »
Someone at the New York Times must be reading The Frisky, because Sunday’s “Social Q’s” column responded to a question that Amelia addressed last week. Reader Nick wrote:
“I went on a date with a girl I’d met online. I didn’t feel any connection and don’t want to go on a second date. Should I flat-out tell her and risk hurting her feelings? Or should I ignore her messages, and hope she gets the point?”
Ah, the age-old debate over whether you should be honest and tell her like it is or just disappear into the ether. Writer Philip Galanes responded by saying it’s better to state the truth. “Reply to her messages normally, and if she asks you out again, tell her you’d rather die — or just be friends. It’s your call,” he writes. Generally, good advice. We at The Frisky prefer honesty to having guys pull “the fade” on us. However, if you don’t actually want to be friends with someone you’ve dated, don’t suggest it. That would also be leading him or her on. [NY Times] Keep reading »