Ten minutes. I was hitting the 10-minute mark of just standing in front of the freezers, seemingly debating whether to buy a quart or a gallon of milk. Or perhaps unsure of which kind I wanted. Skim or whole? Maybe 2 percent? I had a pensive look on my face.
It’s the look I get when I’m frozen inside. Generally from shock. Often from fear. Almost always after a harrowing experience that’s left me momentarily paralyzed.
My allergies had been just horrific, but I’d decided to brave the run across the street to the little bodega anyway because I’d been out of dishwasher soap and milk and coffee filters for three days. As I walked up the steps to the entrance, two men walked out. Because I’m a woman who’s been trained by society not to look strange men in the eye when its dark out and they look potentially threatening, I didn’t. But they stopped in the doorway and came up close to me, speaking far louder than was necessary. “Whoa mama, look at those tits.” “Daaaaamn. Naw like really dog, daaaaaaamn.” One started masturbating and pushed up close to my face as I stared at the ground, trying to navigate around them. He rubbed himself and licked his lips as he undressed me with his eyes and loudly proclaimed what he’d do to me. Keep reading »
Gee, don’t you just love that in the battle to train men to not rape, you have the security secretary of Hong Kong, Lai Tung-kwok, stomping on all our efforts by suggesting women just drink less? I do. It’s my favorite. Having the government permit men to not taking responsibility for their actions and place the onus of avoiding sexually assaul on women is just fabulous. Especially when this was the knee-jerk reaction to a 60 percent rise in reported rapes and an 18 percent rise in reported sexual assaults. As reported by the Wall Street Journal, the director of the Hong Kong Federation of Women’s Centers responded, “There’s a lot of stigma that’s given to the victims. The remarks he made are proof of a culture that blames victims for doing something ‘wrong,’ like drinking.” The fear is that women won’t report abuse because they fear being blamed and shamed. Rape culture, it’s great.
[Wall Street Journal]
Just in case you thought that men should be expected to obtain consent from women before engaging in sexual behavior with them, bigoted blowhard Donald Trump is here to remind you all men are rapists, always. Why else would 26,000 service members have reported experiencing [second item] “unwanted sexual contact” last year? It’s because, Trump tweeted, men and women have never, ever worked alongside each other in coed workplaces without men raping their colleagues. In a followup tweet Trump — who, correct me if I’m wrong, attended a military high school but has never served a day in the actual military, unlike actual women in combat — said “top military brass” didn’t want “a mixer.” But “dumb politicians” just had to endanger these vulnerable women at the hands of all the rapists in uniform. Sorry, ladies. Rape away, dudes — I know you can’t help yourselves. [Examiner]
Last night, a five-year-old girl died in a hospital in India from cardiac arrest, succumbing to wounds suffered when she was raped.
According to a hospital official, the child had been in a coma for over a week and suffered brain damage as a result of being smothered during the attack to stifle her cries. Two men have been arrested in conjunction with the assault. One allegedly lured her to a neighboring farm, and the other, a friend of her parents, raped her. Keep reading »
A University Of Arizona junior named Dean Saxton was photographed last Tuesday standing on campus holding a sign reading “You Deserve Rape” while yelling insults at students. Saxton, who fancies himself a preacher and delivers sermons on campus, told the Daily Wildcat newspaper, emphasis mine, “If you dress like a whore, act like a whore, you’re probably going to get raped. I think that girls that dress and act like [whores], they should realize they do have partial responsibility, because I believe they’re pretty much asking for it.”
He is simply bold enough to verbalize what a lot of people in our rape culture already think about how women deserve violence against them. But if I were working in administration for UA, I would be down on my knees praying that Saxton is not a ticking time bomb who doesn’t actually go and rape some “whore” on campus who was “asking for it.” Keep reading »
Over the past few months, India has been racked with high-profile gang rapes and deaths of little girls and women. From the three sisters under age 11 who were sexually assaulted and murdered to the student who was gang raped with a metal rod, which mangled her insides so badly it eventually killed her, the brutality of the country’s rape culture is horrific. One of the main problems with the rape culture in India has been placing the onus on the victim instead of the perpetrator — society as a whole, including police, had been blaming women for being out in public where they could be attacked, instead of punishing the men who hurt them.
The new laws aren’t perfect. First of all, as legal scholar Karuna Nundy for the BBC notes, the laws only protect the “modesty” of women, not boys, men or transgender folks. Additionally, marital rape is still legal (including if the wife is a minor ages 15 through 18) and homosexuality is still criminalized.
Alas, it is with cautious optimism that we welcome India’s new spate of laws criminalizing rape and other acts of violence which went into effect yesterday. Keep reading »
ABC News aired new video of teen partygoers in Steubenville, Ohio, being questioned by police regarding the sexual assault of “Jane Doe,” the then 15-year-old girl whose story has entranced the nation. On the night of her assault, Jane Doe was raped and carried unconscious to multiple parties all while pictures were taken; last week, Ma’lik Richmond and Trent Mays received one year and two years, respectively, in juvenile detention facilities for participating in her abuse. ABC’s video shows teens (their faces not obscured, for some reason) describing how Jane Doe got increasingly drunk throughout the evening — meaning she was less and less able to consent to any sexual behavior. “She was a mess,” says one boy interviewed by cops. “She wasn’t responding. She was passed out.” Keep reading »
“Love potions do not equal consent. Coercion through magic is illegal. Combined with the use of love potions it is rape.”
Oh, if only those Steubenville rapists could have gotten reported to the Ministry Of Magic. Or should I say those Lord Voldemorts. [The Mary Sue]
Feministing blogger Zerlina Maxwell is a survivor of rape. Last week, Maxwell appeared with Sean Hannity on Fox News and what she said on the show generated some racist, misogynist comments and both rape threats and death threats. Her “controversial” comment? She said, “I think we should be telling men not to rape women and start the conversation there with prevention.”
That’s not OK to say, apparently: it poked the hornet’s nest of our society’s long held, deeply flawed ideas about rape as well as squeamish attitudes when it comes to discussing it.
Zerlina Maxwell, we at The Frisky stand with you. Men should be taught not to rape. Here are three misconceptions about rape that she schooled Sean Hannity and his viewers on in the exchange: Keep reading »