Ah, pubic hair. As if styling the hair on your head isn't enough, the 21st century woman must also focus her attentions on her pubic hair stylings. Some men prefer the landing strip. Sometimes, unruly pubes cause controversy. Of course, you can always go topiary. And let's not forget that LED merkin. So many options!

I’ve recently started dating a super smart, weird, quirky, cute, funny and beautiful girl. I never like anyone, but I like her. There’s one minor (hairy) issue. She doesn’t keep things very trimmed down there. Now, before you get angry, let me preface this by saying that I really don’t need a Brazilian on my girl (or even anything really from the South American continent, for that matter)—just a nice landing strip. Is that too much to ask for? Those in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones, so I do keep my things regularly trimmed. We’ve only been dating for a month or so, but we’ve spent a lot of time together (it’s a long distance thing, so we’ve basically spent the past few weekends totally together = relationship time warp), so I feel as if this isn’t jumping the gun or anything to think about long term personal grooming habits. am I being a superficial douche? Isn’t it fair to ask for some quid pro quo trimming? I think yes. If you agree, my ultimate question is: how do I broach the trimming subject with my long distance girl? What strategies do you have? — Hair Hater

Voodoo Doughnut in Portland, Ore. submitted a racy ad to Bitch Magazine, which refused to run it. The magazine, a self-described “feminist response to pop culture,” explained turning down the ad by stating, “We felt that our readers would feel that the ad goes against our mission statement to be anti-sexist.” Voodoo, where the menu includes Triple Chocolate Penetration and C**k-n-Balls, responded, “I thought Bitch would be happy the woman isn’t plucked and shaved, but all natural like a real woman.” Check out the full NSFW ad after the jump.

One of the reasons people are obsessed with hair is because it’s something you can instantly change and it always grows back (barring unfortunate baldness issues). When it comes to the vagine, we’ve been less than enthusiastic about following trends and changing it up, yet remain hopelessly obsessed. This poster by shopA is called “Evolution of the Muff.” Think you can guess what’s in store for the nether regions today? See the whole poster after the jump! [$25, shopA, SupermarketHq.com]

Health-care plan opponents protest outside Senator Kay Hagan’s office in Raleigh, NC. [8/14/09]

This Sunday, the Broadway revival of the sexy ‘60s musical “Hair” is up for eight Tony Awards. You know they must be doing everything right! So, we decided to ask the hottest hippie in the show, young stud Theo Stockman, all about free love, pubic hair, and what it was like to shove his crotch in the face of “American Idol’s” Adam Lambert.

“I had to grow the hair down there. But because of years of waxing, as all of us girls know, it doesn’t come back quite the way it used to. They even made me a merkin—a wig—because they were so concerned that I might not be able to grow enough.”

—Kate Winslet to Allure, on the importance of authentic pubic hair for her role in “The Reader” [via AHN]

Contrary to what we’ve heard from the guys on our IM, Google searches seem to indicate that men prefer women to have a wild, out of control bush over waxed or shaved pubic styles. According to YesButNoButYes, a bikini shop owner did some investigating of Google search trends and discovered that more people search the term “hairy p*ssy” than they do “bald p*ssy,” “shaved p*ssy,” “brazilian wax,” or “bikini wax.” These are hardly scientific results; after all, who knows if these Googlers were searching for these terms based on pubic hair preference. And besides that, the other results added up about equal the total for “hairy p*ssy” searches. Also, don’t people search for things they’re generally really, like, interested in? Maybe those who really, really like untamed pubes are more devoted to their fetish than the majority who prefer but don’t obsess about a little below-the-belt grooming.

Have a hard time directing traffic through your tunnel of love?  Well, there’s a new light-up merkin (that’s a wig for your lady bits) on the market. Seemingly made from troll hair, the furball for your feminine side has also got LED lights with two “lure” modes so you can literally flash the object of your affection. Plus, you can direct the light to hold their gaze — nothing like blinding a partner right as they get to see you naked!  To get the faux hair down there, all you’ve got to do is place it on with the patented toupee tape. That sticky stuff lasts up to six weeks, but beware, the company behind the merkin, Playazon, whose marketing tagline is, oddly enough, the “online source for that burning sensation,” also warns, “We strongly advise NOT to use this tape as an impromptu waxing substitute—IT CAN REMOVE MORE THAN JUST YOUR HAIR!” Eek! Even at a reasonable $45, this flashlight clearly isn’t gonna turn anyone on. [Trend Hunter]

#1 SCHICK QUATRO Trimstyle Razor & Bikini Trimmer (Euro Version)
This commercial for Schick Quattro’s Trimstyle Razor & Bikini Trimmer has been causing quite a stir in the U.S. since it was released in Europe and found its way onto YouTube. Its double entendres aren’t at all subtle; they’re totally hilarious. The best line in the jingle: “All that’s left for me to see are tulips on the mound.”

In 2009, custom pubic hair styling is the new, new thing. Nad’s Naughty Bikini Design Kit includes your usual home bikini waxing kit fare—with an added bonus for personalizing your pubes. With the Nad’s kit, you can wax your pubic hair into a variety of dramatic shapes so your vagina can speak for itself: Thunderstruck is a lightning bolt, Landing Strip offers the streamlined look, Bermuda Triangle is for the traditional girl who wants to convey an air of genital mystery, and Heartbreaker is the nether region hairdo that tells all those that encounter it: “I love you—for now.” If you’re more into dye jobs than topiary, Betty Beauty, creators of a popular line of pubic hair coloring for women whose carpets simply must match their drapes, is launching a new addition to their blond, brunette, and hot pink color line in ‘09 that would be pretty punk rock matched with a crotch mohawk: lilac. Of course, if you’re looking for something a bit more temporary, the high-fashion runway forecast for 2009 calls for merkins. 

If you ask a man what he looks for when he meets a vagina, besides a great sense of humor of course, he will probably suggest many of the same delusional qualities he wants in his total fantasy female package. Easy on the eye, morning, noon, and night; perfumed to perfection; tantalizing to the taste buds; demure blushing rose bud one day; insatiable quivering tigress purring, “Sic ‘em Rex” the next.

This weekend, when I was in Atlantic City, one of my fellow ragers asked me if she could borrow my tweezers so she could pluck a nipple hair. A nipple hair? She had nipple hair? “Yeah, don’t you?” I honestly didn’t know. She also said she waxed above her lip. Crap, I’ve never waxed my lip. Have I been walking around with a ‘stache for years and no one has ever told me and that’s why I can’t get a rebound to save my life right now?!

On last nights episode of “The Hills” the female ‘stache came back to haunt me—Lauren Conrad had a very obvious dusting of facial fuzz about her lip. If Lauren Conrad has a mustache I must have it too. This morning, the grooming obsession continued when I discovered a horrendous ingrown hair bump, um, you know where. Eww. Maybe I should start listening to the lady mags and actually wax from now on. Especially since I am about to jump back into the dating pool—with that in mind, I decided to ask the dudes on my IM about what they look for, grooming-wise, in a bed mate. I didn’t tell them about my ingrown hair though. I’m hoping it’s gone by the time I sleep with any of them.

Camel toes are embarrassing, especially for celebs. [Perez Hilton]

Test your knowledge on pubic hair. [Dear Sugar]

A Mary Jane smoker is arrested every 38 seconds. [Asylum]

 

Sienna Miller’s pubic hair had to be digitally enhanced in the movie Hippie Hippie Shake because people didn’t get Brazilians back in the ‘60s. [Digital Spy]

 

Lily Allen’s grandmother passed away just a few hours before her performance at Glastonbury. Oh no, this wasn’t Grandma as “Nan, You’re A Window Shopper” is it? The Grandma who likes her tea milky, who has a kitchen where everything’s got a label, and has done her Christmas shopping and we’re only in April? [Daily Mail U.K.]

Weighing in on the male pubic hair debate, Boinkology wants dudes to be individuals with their pubic style. [Boinkology]

Um scary. Half of all unintended pregnancies are the result of “contraception failing or people not using their chosen method of contraception properly”. [Daily Bedpost]

The sworn virgins of Albania… [College Candy]

Robert Buckley from Lipstick Mafia is so hot it’s SICK. [Popbytes]

After yesterday’s “Men’s Summer Fashion Trends We Hate” slideshow, I was reading Us Weekly and came across one I didn’t even know about. “I wax my privates,” says Sean “Diddy” Combs. As in BALD. Beyonce’s beloved, Jay-Z, also goes for the hairless look.  A representative for the Pink Cheeks Salon in L.A. says, “Sexually, you can’t beat it.” Yikes, really? I’ve heard of guys trimming their area significantly because it makes their weens look bigger, but I don’t think I could handle a totally hairless groin. It’s too gay porn star for my taste. What do you ladies think—guys going bald below the belt, yay or nay?

I have never had a bikini wax. Something about it scares me. The only people I allow near my vagina is the boyfriend and my gyno and unless one of them decides on a second career, I probably will never have one. Or so I have always thought. Lately I have been considering giving the ol’ wax a try, if I can muster up the patience and itch-resistance to grow out what hair my pathetic attempts at shaving have removed. But before I do so, I am curious: how are your pubes maintained?

Do guys REALLY care if you aren’t waxed or shaved down there?—Razor Ready, Virginia Beach, VA

I think women’s vaginas are like men’s faces. You’ve basically got three options: The clean-shaven, the week’s worth of stubble, or the mountain-man variety. At the end of the day, it’s all about preference. You might like your man with a baby-smooth face. He might want you to look like a tumble weed and call him mommy during sex. The bottom line is, everybody is different.

Whatever option you go with, I think it’s safe to say your landscaping habits are not going to prevent guys from having sex with you. As long as a guy doesn’t need a degree in bushwhacking to date you, I’m pretty sure you’ll get lucky.