Kwasi Enin, a 17-year-old from Long Island, has a whole lot of options for his college career. This time of year usually brings handwringing for high school students as decision letters from universities roll in, but not for Enin. He was accepted to all eight schools in the Ivy League and now has his pick between Brown, Dartmouth, Harvard, Princeton, Columbia, Cornell, Yale and Penn.
Enin intends to become a doctor one day and would also like to study music. He ranks 11th in his high school class and scored a 2250 on his SAT. He’s taken 11 AP classes and volunteers at a local hospital. He even finds time to sing in his school’s a cappella group! The first-generation Ghanaian’s parents are both nurses, and Enin says financial aid will be key in helping him decide where to enroll — he has until May 1 to choose a school. Keep reading »
Susan Patton gained attention and the moniker “Princeton Mom” nearly a year ago, when the Daily Princetonian published a letter to the editor from the Class of ’77 grad called, “Advice For The Young Women Of Princeton: The Daughters I Never Had,” in which she advised Princeton’s female population to focus on finding a husband during their college years so they wouldn’t end up having to marry some dude who went to a, bleh, state school. Even Princeton women have a shelf life, you see. Well, Patton’s unsolicited advice scored her a book deal of course, which she promoted this morning on “The Today Show” and Savannah Guthrie was quick to go after Patton’s suggestion that college women should devote a whopping 75 percent of their time to man-hunting and only 25 percent towards professional development. “Doesn’t that seem a bit out of whack?” Guthrie asked.
HA, stupid Savannah, not when your eggs are rotting away inside of you! “Work will wait. Your fertility won’t,” said Patton. Yes, it’s not enough that this society has post-grad women all in a tizzy about their fertility — Patton thinks college fucking freshman should be focused on finding someone to put a bun in their oven. This woman is literally advising all young women, including those paying top dollar for an Ivy League education, to prioritize getting their MRS. degree over anything else so they don’t end up barren and alone. HOW. FUCK. Keep reading »
Earlier this month, the world met Susan Patton, a 1977 graduate of Princeton University, authoress of the world’s snobbiest letter to the editor of The Daily Princetonian. Its utterly-sincere advice that female undergrads marry fellow Princetonians because they’ll never find men as intelligent anywhere else in the world — followed by the news that Patton had recently divorced and blamed her husband for attending a no-name college — made her an instant Internet villainess.
It also got her invited back to speak to Princeton last week, where she shared more of her dating tips, including: “A woman looking for a husband in her 30s gives off total desperation.” Such spinster harridans are absolute “man repellent,” she warned. Keep reading »
“Forget about having it all, or not having it all, leaning in or leaning out — here’s what you really need to know that nobody is telling you.”
That’s how now-infamous “Princeton Mom” Susan Patton began her letter to “Princeton women,” advising them to lock down a Princeton man by the time they graduate, lest their lives turn, over the next three decades or so, to fetid piles of vaguely unfulfilling upper-middle-class Princeton shit.
Princeton women — and all women, and actually everybody in a place of transition, as so many college students and young people and old people and middle-aged people are — please allow me to finish her premise with the actual thing you “really need to know that nobody is telling you.”
You don’t have a “shelf life.” There’s almost nothing you can’t undo, deal with or mitigate the damage of. You do not have to set your life trajectory on ascend, now or at any other time. You are going to be fine. Keep reading »
Last week, the world met Susan A. Patton, Princeton grad of ’77, whose uber-snobbish letter to the editor of the Daily Princetonian was heard ’round the globe. Patton’s screed, penned to “the daughters I never had,” warned the young ladies of Princeton that they should find their husbands now, in college, because men in the rest of the world are morons. You can read the whole ridiculous shitshow here, including the part where Patton kvelled about how her son, a Princeton student (of course), would be quite a catch.
This week, much to her childrens’ consternation, Princeton Mom is still talking. Keep reading »
Princeton graduates, in my experience, have been the most insufferable bunch of Ivy League braggadocios to ever walk this Earth. People I know who went to Yale, Harvard or Columbia don’t need to advertise it. But if someone went to Princeton, just like if someone is a vegan, THEY WILL TELL YOU.
Susan A. Patton, Princeton grad of ’77, does nothing to diminish this stereotype. In her laughably snobbish, elitist letter to the editor in the Daily Princetonian, “Advice For The Young Women Of Princeton: The Daughters I Never Had,” she advises female undergraduates to get their M.R.S. degree now now amongst the Princeton class, lest they be stuck marrying some nosepicking boogereater who went to NYU, or, god forbid, a state school. Keep reading »