Tag Archives: poop

Product We Hope We’ll Never Need: Pantyliners For Your Butt

Product We Hope We'll Never Need: Pantyliners For Your Butt

“The Butterfly Effect” is a sci-fi thriller starring Ashton Kutcher, yes. But it’s also the phrase used to describe the relief one feels when she knows her underwear are protected from skid marks. As advertised in a recent issue of Martha Stewart Living, Butterfly body liners (or poopliners, as I prefer to call them) are a “new kind of discreet protection from ABL” (accidental bowel leakage). The caption next to the smiling model, Renee age 53, reads:

“It’s hard to believe such a little thing could make such a big difference. Talk about a butterfly effect.”

Important question: Are there kegels you can do for your butthole so you never have to experience the butterfly effect? [Jezebel]

Sorority Girls Are Now Pooping In Their Dorm Hallways

Today in what in the ever loving holy hell: human shit was found in the hallway of a University of Alabama dorm, allegedly dropped by a sorority girl. (But there are nearly 1,000 girls living in that dorm, so it might be difficult to track down the poop bandit.) Total Frat Move received photographic evidence of the scat found (and the unlucky RA who had to clean it up) in Tutwiler Hall, an all-girls dormitory.

Now, here’s the really disturbing part: this is the second incident of non-toilet excrement at one of the university’s dorm. Three weeks ago, an anonymous dude reported that a Bama sorority girl shat on a dorm chair and wiped with a comforter as payback for a hookup gone wrong.  Keep reading »

Band Of Strangers Save Girl From Septic Tank

septic-tank

When a toddler fell into a septic tank Saturday, it took a group of concerned strangers to get her out — and one of them had recently been released from prison.

The 2-year-old girl was walking with her mother in Maricopa, Arizona, when she stepped on a septic tank lid. The lid collapsed under the girl’s feet and she fell into a tube full of murky, foul water. Read more on HLN…

The Amazon Reviews For Haribo Sugarless Gummy Bears Are Disgustingly Hilarious

The Amazon Reviews For Haribo Sugarless Gummy Bears Are Disgustingly Hilarious

The reviews on Amazon are often a treasure trove of hilarity, but occasionally they are both amusing and educational. For example, I had no idea until today that if I were to eat a handful of Haribo sugarless gummy bears, I could expect my insides to turn into hot lava. According to the hundreds of reviews for the candy on Amazon, these gummy bears are incredibly tasty going in and incredibly painful coming out. As I’m a journalist, I plan on finding and ingesting these bears myself to confirm the validity of the reviews. I have a very strong and regular constitution, so if these Haribo sugarless gummies manage to give me “projectile diarrhea so foul and so watery it could have gone through … nylons,” as one reviewer described, you’ll know they’re to be avoided. I’ll report back! In the meantime, check out some more of the hilarious reviews of these unintentional laxatives after the jump! [Amazon via Slightly Viral] Keep reading »

Sorority Girls Gets Back At Boyfriend By Pooping On His Bed

angry-girl

A tipster wrote into Total Frat Move saying,”A Beta took a chick home last night then ditched her to apparently hook up with another girl. The original girl wasn’t too happy so she took a shit on his chair then wiped with his comforter. Read more on College Candy…

This Is What Happens When You Piss Off The Baker Making Your Engagement Cake

When bride-to-be Micaela Harris told her sister she had an engagement cake all lined up for her party, her sister insisted on being the one to bring the cake. Micaela agreed and her sister went about getting her a custom-made cake from New Zealand bakery, Oh Cakes. Somewhere along the way, Micaela’s sister got in an argument (the details of which are not specified unfortunately) with Emma McDonald, the owner of Oh Cakes. That’s when things got crappy. Keep reading »

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