Posts tagged "poop"

Dear Prudence Counsels Woman Whose Boyfriend Likes To Initiate Sex After Diarrhea

In today’s Dear Prudence letter, a woman going by the name of “Feeling Dirty” wrote in “grossed out” and “confused” that her boyfriend of two years seems to be turned on every time she poops — especially if it’s of the diarrhea variety. The woman, who mentions that she grew up in a house where…

Ami Angelowicz / February 27, 2014

Gross Talk: 6 Things To Expect From Your First Colonic (Because I Just Had My First Colonic And It Was Pretty Great)

Life is an adventure, or that’s what I told myself yesterday, as a small tube was inserted into my butthole. Hold on, let me backtrack. A few weeks ago, a friend in PR asked if I wanted to write about something called the Optimum Detox Treatment offered at Manhattan’s Paul Labrecque Salon and Spa. Naturally, I…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / February 11, 2014

Product We Hope We’ll Never Need: Pantyliners For Your Butt

“The Butterfly Effect” is a sci-fi thriller starring Ashton Kutcher, yes. But it’s also the phrase used to describe the relief one feels when she knows her underwear are protected from skid marks. As advertised in a recent issue of Martha Stewart Living, Butterfly body liners (or poopliners, as I prefer to call them) are…

Ami Angelowicz / February 10, 2014

Sorority Girls Are Now Pooping In Their Dorm Hallways

Today in what in the ever loving holy hell: human shit was found in the hallway of a University of Alabama dorm, allegedly dropped by a sorority girl. (But there are nearly 1,000 girls living in that dorm, so it might be difficult to track down the poop bandit.) Total Frat Move received photographic evidence…

Ami Angelowicz / January 31, 2014

Band Of Strangers Save Girl From Septic Tank

When a toddler fell into a septic tank Saturday, it took a group of concerned strangers to get her out — and one of them had recently been released from prison.
The 2-year-old girl was walking with her mother in Maricopa, Arizona, when she stepped on a septic tank lid. The lid collapsed under the…

HLN / January 16, 2014

The Amazon Reviews For Haribo Sugarless Gummy Bears Are Disgustingly Hilarious

The reviews on Amazon are often a treasure trove of hilarity, but occasionally they are both amusing and educational. For example, I had no idea until today that if I were to eat a handful of Haribo sugarless gummy bears, I could expect my insides to turn into hot lava. According to the hundreds of reviews for…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / January 16, 2014

Sorority Girls Gets Back At Boyfriend By Pooping On His Bed

A tipster wrote into Total Frat Move saying,”A Beta took a chick home last night then ditched her to apparently hook up with another girl. The original girl wasn’t too happy so she took a shit on his chair then wiped with his comforter. Read more on College Candy…

College Candy / January 15, 2014

This Is What Happens When You Piss Off The Baker Making Your Engagement Cake

When bride-to-be Micaela Harris told her sister she had an engagement cake all lined up for her party, her sister insisted on being the one to bring the cake. Micaela agreed and her sister went about getting her a custom-made cake from New Zealand bakery, Oh Cakes. Somewhere along the way, Micaela’s sister got i…

Ami Angelowicz / January 6, 2014

Dramatic Portraits Of Dogs Pooping

Everybody poops, including dogs. But when these dogs poop, they do it with a certain style, grace and dare we say, emotional intensity that sets their bowel movements apart. Presented without further commentary, Huffington Post brings you the Bold Italic’s “Dramatic Portraits of Dogs Pooping” by Brock Daves. See more portraits on Huffington Post…

Huffington Post Weird News / November 17, 2013

Poopie Poems Are A Literary Triumph

When digging through the bowels of the internet, you tend to find both shit and nuggets of gold. Sometimes, you find both. The shitnugget interweb discovery of the day (thank you, Amelia) is a website called Poopie Poems, featuring the largest collection of poop poetry on the web. You can browse through well-crafted Haipoops, Rhyming

Ami Angelowicz / October 17, 2013

Oh Crap! America (Finally) Gets Its First Poop-Themed Restaurant

Call me crazy/weird/gross/foul, but I am dying to go to The Magic Restroom Cafe, a poop-themed eatery in Los Angeles. Putting it on my next SoCal itinerary! [Huffington Post]
Um, Star magazine is trying to claim that Bruce Jenner wants to become a woman. I can’t. [Popbytes]
Teenage Disney Ninja Princesses? Teenage Disney…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / October 16, 2013

Little Boy Shares Adorable Inner Monologue While Pooping

Ugh! We we’ve all been there: eaten too much and didn’t know why. Found ourselves on the porcelain throne, regretting it. This little boy is learning the hard truth that when you eat too many  apples, poutine, cheesestring, pickle chips, peanut butter and raisins, chocolate thingies, more chocolate thingies and gummies, that your poo might…

Ami Angelowicz / October 10, 2013

Good News! The Yale “Poopetrator” Used Chocolate, Not Feces, On Clothing Line

The “poopetrator” who left human poop in the dorm laundry machines is still at large at Yale University. But fortunately the brown stuff that was smeared on clothing on Friday was just chocolate, not feces. Rumors are circulating that a “senior society” called the Pundits may have smeared chocolate on items hanging from a clothing…

Jessica Wakeman / October 8, 2013

There’s A Crazy Poop Bandit On The Loose At Yale

Poop bandits can strike anywhere, at any time — from the shared bathrooms of your office building, to campus of Yale. According to the The Yale Daily News, someone who goes by the moniker “Yale Poopetrator” has been going number one and number two in unattended dryers and, on Friday at 3:35 a.m., sent out…

Ami Angelowicz / October 4, 2013

The Secret To Acting Like Your S**t Don’t Stink

The secret to acting like your shit don’t stink is not wearing a ball gown speaking with a British accent while you poop. It’s Poo~Pourri, the spray that masks the scent of the “creamy behemoth you just birthed from your cavernous bowels.” (God, I’m jealous that I didn’t write that line.) The spritz is scientifically…

Ami Angelowicz / September 15, 2013

Don’t Get Caught Brown-Handed — Use Poop Mittens! (NSFW)

Shittens are disposable moist wipe mittens to protect your hands from getting errant doody on them while wiping yourself, a baby’s bum, or any other gross orifice you may come in contact with. “In general, Shittens are for fecal emergencies. But feel free to live like a Rockefeller and enjoy a Shitten every time you…

Jessica Wakeman / August 16, 2013

Jogger Caught On Video Pooping In Man’s Yard

One woman in New Mexico has a really bad habit of pooping in the same man’s yard on her morning runs. The man, who wishes to remain anonymous, has described the attacks as “malicious fecal distribution,” according to Daily Mail.

Mary Odell / July 21, 2013

We’re Breaking Up: Poopy Peeping Tom Who Hid Inside A Septic Tank

Dear Kenneth Webster Enlow,

Now, I do love a man who goes after what he wants. Initiative is hot! Motivation is sexy! The problem, though, is that  you wanted to be a peeping tom inside a septic tank in the women’s restroom at a public park.

Jessica Wakeman / July 9, 2013

Today In Poop: Feces Falls From The Sky Onto Family’s Backyard

Pictured above are the Giannakos family of Ontario. They shitstorm survivors. Literally. Last week, they were just sitting in their backyard enjoying some family playtime when the mother, Emma Gilfillan-Giannakos, heard what she described as a “loud splash” followed by tons of small, hard, brown pellets floating in her pool.

“I had no…

Ami Angelowicz / June 24, 2013

As I Always Feared, There’s Lots Of Poop In Public Swimming Pools

Each summer, around the time that it hits about 90 degrees and 90 percent humidity, I walk by the public pool at the park in my neighborhood and contemplate diving in. I ache for a cool dip. But then I see all the children in the pool and first thing I think is, You can’t go

Ami Angelowicz / May 17, 2013