Well, that’s one way to sell intimate wipes.
Playtex is hawking these new genital wipes for “before and after” activities involving your genitalia, whatever those might be. We have no idea. But we do know the feminine hygiene industry has a long and sordid history of shaming women into buying products to “sanitize” and perfume our lady business (oh, capitalism!), despite the fact any gyno will tell you the delicate pH balance of your vagina is best left alone.
But, at the very least, we can appreciate that Playtex’s ad campaign includes one marketed towards dudes in need of a clean “pecker.” Check it out after the jump. A dude’s sweaty junk is no picnic, either. Keep reading »
The costumes look great. Some of them were very cumbersome and heavy, but some were very snug. You can almost see what religion I am.
Rrrrow! I’ll bet they look great, Benedict Cumberbatch. Of course, this joke actually means nothing because circumcision isn’t so religiously based anymore, but we thank him kindly for the visual. It sounds like the wardrobe for this movie is the men’s version of the Hervé Léger bandage dress. [io9]
Women have no secrets. Not really. We readily spill the beans about everything from the guy we hooked up with to our marital problems. Discussing our lives is the glue that keeps book clubs together. But there’s something we need to talk more openly about: penis size.
Not that we haven’t been discussing size, but we’ve only been doing it in hushed voices after several martinis. Why? Because men have made size a taboo subject, even though they’re the ones who are obsessed with it.
Our silence isn’t helping. Men foolishly seem to think size is a big deal, or the only deal. This is evidenced by the overwhelming amount of emails for penis enlargement procedures clogging up my spam folder. Men get hung up on equating their masculinity or their sexual prowess with their penis size. That couldn’t be further from the truth, at least, from the female perspective. Keep reading »
Ever rolled over in the morning to snuggle your dude and got jabbed in the belly button? Thought so. That’s because all men experience “noctural penile tumescence,” AKA morning wood. As the folks as ASAP Science explain above, morning wood has to do with REM sleep, a neurotransmitter called norepinephrine, and even the dude’s bladder. I used to think men just awoke horny because I’m so damn sexy! Sadly, the cold, hard truth is less flattering. (Did you see what I did there?) [Towel Road]
“It’s a lot of butt. I got scared. Unless I’m around certain people, I don’t like to be naked. [Laughs.] I have a great picture of me naked on a bed just wearing a cock sock, and the crew is all around me, bored. We were all waiting for a film roll or a lens to arrive. So I’m just sitting around naked on the bed and everyone’s so nonchalant. It was really weird for me, like, ‘Man, this is awkward.’”
– If you don’t know who Evan Peters plays on “American Horror Story: Asylum,” please, stay in the dark. I want him to be all mine. But yeah, he’s naked a lot this season.
After the jump, Evan talks more about his cock sock and described what it’s liked to get spanked on his bare ass by Jessica Lange. (She does that a lot this season.) Keep reading »
I normally love rounded colors and contrast piping, but in the case of this blouse, the effect is very, umm, well, it looks like a cock and balls. What do you think? Would you dare to wear such a phallic fashion? [$53, ASOS]
If you’ve had a craving for rain forests, untapped deposits of raw minerals, and gigantic penises, now’s the time to head to the Republic of Congo. A new study ranked the world’s countries by average length of erect penises and found that the Congo is home to the most well-endowed individuals. At 7.1 inches, their enormous sex organs put them at the top, just above the male populations in Ecuador (7.0 inches), Ghana (6.8), Columbia (6.7), and Iceland (6.5).
Wondering where the good ol’ US of A falls on the world’s penis chart? Get out your magnifying glass … you’re gonna need it. Read more…
Conservative talk radio host and major douchebag Rush Limbaugh has unwisely ensured that “Rush Limbaugh small penis” will forevermore be the most delightful of Internet search terms. Keep reading »
Try to have sex with an animal against its will, expect a penis injury.
“When I saw the raccoon I thought I’d have some fun,” said 44-year-old Russian man, Alexander Kirilov.
I spent a long time trying to understand this sentence. The thought of “having some fun” with an animal is beyond my scope of comprehension. Keep reading »
Important business to attend to! We need to discuss this crazy picture of Jon Hamm’s balls. While out strolling this weekend with Jennifer Westfeldt, there were some very interesting pics snapped of his junk. Some featured his incredibly sizable shlong. Not that we’re complaining. There’s never any issue with a devastatingly handsome man being well-endowed. BUT. THE BALLS. Granted, we’ve seen balls of all shapes and sizes. Amelia had a brief fling with a guy with “grapefruit-sized balls” — “Like Christmas tree ornaments!” she emphasizes — and I once slept with a dude whose balls were the size of Lindor truffles. I swear. But nuts, regardless of size or shape, are smushy. Sorry, but something about these moose knuckles just don’t look right to us. After the jump, some theories about what might have been going on Jon’s pants. Keep reading »