Tag Archives: penis

And The World Capital Of Penis Enlargement Is…

penis-enlargement-news

Not satisfied with the size of your sausage? Feeling bad about the brat that you got? Is your wiener simply the wurst? Guess where 18 percent of all penis enlargements in the world took place. Find out on Huffington Post…

Dude, Where’s My Dick? One Man’s Routine Circumcision Goes Very Wrong

You know how sometimes you go to the hairdresser asking for just a trim, but you worry that they’ll get chop-happy and cut off more than you asked for? Well, imagine that happening to your penis.

A man named Johnny Lee Banks Jr. recently went to the hospital for a routine circumcision (in as much as getting circumcised as an adult is routine), and woke up from surgery to find that they had amputated his penis. We’re talking gone with the wind, people. Rightfully so, Johnny and his wife, Zelda, are now suing the Princeton Baptist Medical Center in Alabama for the botched job and for their personal suffering from the incident. Keep reading »

Rapper Andre Johnson Cut Off His Own Penis Because “Sex Is For Mortals And I Am A God”

  • Finally, we have answers about why rapper Andre Johnson cut off his own penis and proceeded to jump off a second-story building back in April. He told E! News, “Yes, I was using drugs that night, but I was in complete control. I cut it off because that was the root of all my problems. My solution to the problem was the realization was that sex is for mortals and I am a god. … Those kinds of activities got me into trouble, and I came here to be a god.” His junk was successfully reattached, in case you’re wondering. [The Grio]
  • Eva Mendes kept her pregnancy hidden by basically becoming a prisoner in her own home. [RYAN TOO. -- Amelia] [People] Keep reading »

Rapper Who Cut Off His Own Penis Wants His Reattached Dick To Appear In Porn

Rapper Who Cut Off His Own Penis Wants His Reattached Dick To Appear In Porn

Perhaps you remember the story of Andre Johnson (aka Christ Bearer), the rapper who, back in April, cut off his own penis (second item) and then jumped off a second floor balcony.  (He claims he was high on PCP at the time, making this story pretty much the best PCP deterrent I’ve ever heard.) Well, there’s good news! In May, doctors were able to complete a successful surgical reattachment of Johnson’s johnson and that it’s now “fully functional” again. Um, really? That’s amazing!

“Does it work?! Can Chris Brown dance? Can Kanye West rant? Can Jay Z fight off a trick?” Johnson yelled in a video you can watch on TMZ. Keep reading »

Meet China’s Hands-Free Sperm Extractor Machine (For The Times When A Regular Handjob Won’t Do)

sperm extractor
Look, Ma, No Hands!

File this one under “Things I Had To Check Weren’t A Clickhole Post First”: hospitals in China have machines to extract sperm. The hands-free gizmos are used by urology departments to manually pump out semen through a “massage pipe” when extracting it the, ummm, normal way doesn’t work anymore. Apparently it is used for sperm donation? I dunno, the sperm extractor looks unappealingly antiseptic and clinical to me (video is SFW), although I guess it’s not much different than a Fleshlight. Pity the poor urological nurse in charge of clean up! [IFL Science]

The 5 Most Ridiculous Products Made For Crotch Maintenance

crotch-products

Genitals are perhaps the only thing in the world that everyone loves and most people don’t mind sharing with others. That’s why they also tend to be fairly well-maintained, be it by rigorous daily training using the … um, workout material we find on the Internet, or by flat out gluing our junk full of Swarovski crystals.

I’m not saying that taking care of our fun bits is a bad thing. For the most part, it’s the best thing. It’s just that some of the stuff we subject them to seems a tad … overkill. Read more on Cracked…

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