Tag Archives: penis

Quiz Results: I Know More About The P Than I Do The V

Last night, my friend Lauren sent me a link to a quiz on Women’s Health‘s website called “Are You A Penis Expert?” While watching “American Idol” I took the quiz — though I assumed I, duh, was — and was mildly pleased to get six out of nine correct. Not too shabby! Then today I saw that Women’s Health also has a “What’s Your Vagina IQ?” test and thought, Surely I will excel at this one! I am my lady flower’s BFF! I got seven out of 13 correct. According to my calculator (because I forgot how to do division), that means I got 54 percent on the vagina quiz and 67 percent on the penis quiz. I know more about the P than I do the V. As a woman, I am sort of embarrassed. In my defense, the questions on the V quiz were a little trickier, what with some of the questions being about the vulva not the vagina and I failed to think about the distinction. Anyway, I learned some useful things. Did you know that most gynos recommend going commando over wearing undies, unless your clothing is irritating? Take the quizzes and lemme know how you stack up! ["What's Your Vagina IQ?" and "Are You A Penis Expert?"] Keep reading »

Quotable: Scary Things Have Happened To Channing Tatum’s Penis

“[While filming in freezing cold water] the only way to keep warm was by pouring a mix of boiling water and river water down your suit. We were finally done shooting for the day, and one of the crew guys asks if I want to warm up before I go. I’m like, ‘Nah, I’m good.’ And then I thought, ‘Why not?’ Thing is, he’d forgotten to dilute the kettle water. So he poured scalding water down my suit! And I was trying to pull the suit away from my body to somehow get away from the boiling water, and the more I pulled the suit away, the lower the water went. It just went straight down and pretty much burned the skin off the head of my d**k … I’ve been to the hospital, gotten stitches, had broken fingers and toes. But this was a suffocating kind of pain!”

—”Dear John” star Channing Tatum explains the worst day his penis has ever had [Details] Keep reading »

Man Mistakes Steel Pipe For Vagina, Gets Penis Stuck

A 40-year-old man in the U.K. must have thought that the giant steel pipe he lodged his penis in on Tuesday was a vagina or some other warm orifice. Otherwise, how could we account for such a poor insertion decision? Actually, I’m not sure I want to know his reasoning. What we do know is that after his ween was sufficiently stuck (I’m picturing a Pooh-Bear-in-a-rabbit-hole scenario), he had no choice but to call emergency services to rescue his member. (I’m wondering what the operator’s reaction to hearing the words “My penis is stuck in a steel pipe!” was?) He was initially taken to the ER, but doctors were unable to operate on him because the restricted blood flow caused a giant erection. Not the best time to get turned on, eh? Let’s just say it was no quickie lube job. With the steady hands of seven firefighters, it took 30 minutes and a metal grinder (arrrgghhh!) to free his bruised and battered willy. Lesson learned, boys? Just another insane peen story for the record books. [Newser] Keep reading »

And The Best Penis Haikus Are …

We’re so glad that author Alan Weider is finding new ways to celebrate the c**k. After the release of his memoir, The Year of the C**k, a tale about the year his ween obsession reeked havoc on his life, Alan decided to keep the penis love growing by sponsoring a penis haiku (phaiku) contest. If you’re a poetry lover like me, then you probably entered the contest. Well … the esteemed judges have voted on their favorite phaikus. I was disappointed to find out that my entry came in sixth place. Boo! But I must admit the winning entries were c**ktastic. After the jump, the winners’ penile musings. May I suggest a vagina haiku (vaiku) contest next, Alan? Keep reading »

The Most Ridiculous Penis Stories Of 2009

There are some pretty crazy people out there. A lot of them have penises, and many of those penises have had hilariously insane things happen to them. So, if you’re not planning on eating a salami sandwich for lunch, feast on these nine amazing sausage stories from 2009! Keep reading »

16 Famous Man Bulges

Famous Man Bulges

Oh, hello there. We were feeling a little on the pervy side today, because, you know, that’s how we roll, and of course, there’s the new David Beckham H&M ads where he’s clad only in underwear. What a fine piece of man human he is. This pic is sure to become a man bulge classic. We put two and two together and dang it! If men can stare at our breasts when we walk down the street, then we can Google “famous man bulge” and post the results here. Enjoy!

Frisky Q & A: Alan Wieder Talks “Year Of The Cock,” Penis Size, And Vagina Worship

Alan Wieder is not embarrassed to talk about his wang. In fact, he’s written an entire memoir about getting to know his … er … penis better. Year of the Cock: The Remarkable True Account of a Man Who Left His Wife and Paid the Price chronicles the year (ironically, the year of the rooster—hee hee) that Alan decided to follow his little head on a destructive journey. He packed up his things and moved out of his home, ready to pursue his fantasy of becoming a hardcore bachelor. During this premature mid-life crisis, he buys a vintage Porsche, bangs lot o’ chicks, and becomes obsessed with the size of his member. I know what you’re thinking. What a jerk! Why would I want to spend 300 pages reading about penile insecurity? Because Alan’s hilarious and, somehow, his year of cockiness is refreshing. Trust me, you’ll laugh too hard to judge him. Keep reading »

Enter This Penis Haiku Contest!

I have been writing bad poetry for as long as I can remember. Well, at least since I penned the gripping haiku, “The Spark,” in 7th grade. I can’t share it … it’s just too embarrassing. But yes, it does follow the 5-7-5 syllable pattern. Can I still write a hard-hitting haiku? Yes, I believe I can. And now I have the chance I’ve been waiting for. Alan Wieder, author of the new memoir Year of the C**k, which chronicles his penile trials and tribulations, is having a contest to find the best haikus about his favorite topic … the penis. You bet your c**k I am entering my phaiku (penis + haiku) on his website for a chance to win an autographed copy of the book. Check out my masterpiece after the jump. [Asylum] Keep reading »

How To Compliment A Man’s Wang

Our friends over at Asylum created a handy guide on “How to Praise Your Lady’s Vagina.” Do guys really need tips on stuff like that? What is the proper etiquette for a vagina conversation? Do women actually need vagina compliments? Anyway, “Your vagina is so much hotter than my last girlfriend’s vagina” inspired us to create a comparable list for the ladies. Face-to-face with a man’s penis, what’s a girl supposed to say? Our suggestions, after the jump! Keep reading »

Doin’ It With Dr. V: How To Blow An Uncut Man’s Mind

The Frisky’s own Leonora has just moved to France, and we miss her already! She’s having all kinds of new experiences, I’m sure. Fondling haute couture, chowing down on cheese and baguette, and, of course, falling for some handsome gentlemen. But being a nice Jewish girl, I have a feeling Leo the lover has never come head-to-head, er face-to-face, with an uncircumcised guy. And just like a lot of foreign films that come out of Europe, they’re uncut. So, I’m going to give our fair Leo some pointers on how to manhandle her future friends with foreskin. Keep reading »

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