Tag Archives: paul janka

D-Bags Galore: A Field Guide To The 7 Worst Guys On The Internet

Every once in a while, a singular man emerges out of all the double rainbows, cats wearing wigs and Lady Gaga fan fic, and proves himself to be a truly exceptional asshat. These very special guys say and do offensive, obnoxious and borderline illegal things and then POST ABOUT IT ON THE INTERNET — and for that we think they should all collectively probably never get laid again.

Earlier this week, a new d-bag tossed his ring into the Crappy Internet Dude pool. Adam White was a whiny blogger/frustrated writer who outed the identity of Twitterer TeleEroticist — a female blogger who wrote hilarious missives on her experiences as a phone sex operator — to her family. White was seemingly bitter that TeleEroticist’s writing — along with that of other women writers like Julie Klausner — was getting notice while his own highly fascinating blog, “Reasons Why I Hate Girls,” was not. This guy is just one of a zillion out there who mistakenly believes that a woman’s success comes at his own expense. But perhaps, dear Adam, these female writers are getting book deals because they’re talented and you’re not, baby.

After the jump, we’ve assembled some of the worst dudes to ever grace the internet’s tubes in one handy list. It’s not simply that these guys suck; they suck in particular because they hide behind the protective safety of their computer monitors (safely out of kicking range) in order to say and do truly horrible things. Get ready for douche chills. Keep reading »

Pickup Artist Paul Janka Charms Another One

A couple of months ago, we brought you into the world of Paul Janka, aka the World’s Most Subtle Pickup Artist, a title he should clearly trademark soon. Today, one of his conquests shared her experience meeting Janka with Gawker, and we think you’ll find it a truly beautiful story. This woman met Janka at a party a few months ago, after which her invited her to Rome to stay at a friend’s villa. It sounded sweet until he sent her a message that read: “I bought your ticket … Make sure to get a waxing; I’m going to make all your holes very sore.” She decided to back out of their Italian adventure. He sent the cheesy snapshot of himself you see at left to try to convince her otherwise. When she made it clear that, no really, she wasn’t getting on that plane, he wrote her this line of poetry. “It’s a shame you decided to get clever and fuck it all up for yourself.” Ah, but a true gentleman like Janka knows that persistence is a virtue. Even though this all went down a while ago, this woman still receives text messages from him saying things like, “Want some coffee and want it up the ass?” I hope we can all find a guy as romantic as him some day. [Gawker] Keep reading »

Things I’m Afraid Of: Paul Janka

Because I think it’s important to face your fears, I did something today that terrifies me. I signed up for Paul Janka’s website. In case you aren’t familiar with the Jank, he’s a notorious Brooklyn pick-up artist and compulsive dater. Here are a few gruesome facts about him… Keep reading »

  • Zergnet: Simply Irresistible

  • HowAboutWe

  • Popular