There were a lot of things I knew I’d have to think about when we decided to get married. I don’t just mean the lofty “What is marriage for?” questions. I mean the practical questions about the ceremony and party. What I’d be wearing underneath my dress for the big day wasn’t, however, one of the things on my mind.
That is until I watched an episode of “Say Yes to the Dress” in which a former beauty queen is lectured by her father about not wearing a thong to her dress fitting. “Thong” is not a word I would ever want to hear come out of my own father’s mouth, but I guess if that’s their relationship, who am I to judge? Prior to that, however, I wasn’t privy to the entire world that is bridal undergarments — a world wherein you’re not just expected to wear something stain-free and seamless, but sexy too. Indeed, “bridal underwear” is its own species in the genus of undergarments. Keep reading »
Whoa boy, these panties. Perhaps I just don’t live the kind of lifestyle that warrants fringed underwear. After all, underwear that accentuates the mons pubis isn’t for everybody. Or most people? On the upside, I suppose you don’t need to do much shaving and waxing when you wear these guys. [$32, Sugar Kitty Corsets]
If I ever have a daughter, I know what she’s getting for her seventh birthday: a crotchless thong, of course! No, but seriously, a Colorado woman was shopping with her children at Kids N Teen in Greeley Mall when she spotted the unthinkable: a tiny thong featuring a split down the crotch. Erin French snapped a cell phone video and went to the media; the owner of Kids N Teen initially defended her choice of merchandise by saying that “25 percent of her merchandise is for teens.” (The crotchless thongs have since been removed.) I don’t know which is worse — the fact that crotchless thongs for little girls exist or the fact that the store owner even believes them to be suitable for 9th graders. What ever happened to kids being kids (and wearing underwear not blatantly intended for sex)? [9news.com via Jezebel]
There are things every college girl should own: a comfy pair of sweatpants, a hoodie for super hung-over mornings, the perfect shirt to wear to the bar and a good ole’ pair of skinny jeans.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, you’re rolling your eyes at like me tell me something I don’t already know. Keep reading »
Forever 21 is going all American Apparel on our asses. Literally! A quick click-through on their online lingerie section revealed some scandalous cameltoe action. When the blogger for WTForever21 posted one of the most explicit examples on her Facebook page, the content was removed shortly thereafter. No reason was cited, though the blogger guesses the problem was that the “young women’s vagina lips [were quite] so clearly outlined.” They are called labia, honey.
Do y’all think this photo crosses the line? Or is Facebook just overreacting, as usual? [WTForever 21] Keep reading »
Forget about candy-colored bra and panty sets from Target; there’s ickier underwear for little girls afoot. It’s lingerie, to be exact, although the French line Jours Aprés Lunes calls it “loungerie,” because it is for lounging around instead of, uh, looking sexy prior to f**king . Why, praytell, would girls ages four through 12 want to wear lingerie? To look like mommy, of course. This shouldn’t be a surprise, seeing as little girls are painting their nails, and getting facials and spray tans just like “big girls” these days. Companies will introduce “new” adult products to little girls any way they can as a way to make more money. Keep reading »
And now a pubic service announcement from everybody’s favorite bra bitch, Brianna! Happy Friday from Pantyland! Mine started in a bunch after reading a tweet that contained my two favorite things: Rob Kardashian and underwear. Even though he looks like an overgrown 10-year-old who’s allowed to drink beer, I have a soft spot in my, um, heart for the only Kardashian with a Y chromosome. And I needn’t even elaborate on my love for all things intimate. Mr. K, as he’s known in most of my fantasies, tweeted: “So u girls are only allowed to wear undies … good thing u can get them here” and the “here” led to Freshpair, where it’s National Underwear Day. Like, now. Today. But the cool part is that they’re “celebrating” by giving away 5,000 “fresh pairs” for free. Angels, I tell you. Angels. My squeals of glee, however, quickly turned to disgust when I read WHY they’re giving it away: A recent Freshpair poll told the sick tale that 73 percent of the American population wears old “expired” underwear that’s been ruined by stains, holes and more runs than your granny’s panty hose. I had heard enough.
Keep reading »
First of all, I need to know how Shreddies, the flatulence filtering underwear, work. Is there an air freshener inside the panties? Are they sound proof? I have so many questions. After I’ve demystified the logistics of Shreddies, I’d like to understand how that woman got into that pose otherwise known as the international body position for “I’m farting with confidence.” [The Clearly Dope] Keep reading »