There was nothing wrong with her. She was not to blame. She was the apotheosis of lust, comprising every element of cisgendered sex from the grrrl-next-door to the bust-down. I wanted her. I needed her. It’s just that this time — this one time — I couldn’t orgasm. Yes, I loved sex, and yes, I loved her, but my body wasn’t cooperating. It’s just wasn’t going to happen that night. It had nothing to do with how I felt about her. She had no reason to feel inadequate.
I repeated the sentiments above to her for two hours. I did it while naked, sweaty, and lying next to her existential crisis. Young and dumb, I believed honesty was the easiest policy. I underestimated the alacrity with which my partner would adopt my malfunction as her own. To her, a man’s orgasm was a simple machine. To not successfully “operate” such a thing felt like the cruelest sleight to her femininity. Obviously, this was not the truth. Unfortunately, the truth rarely has a place with young lovers. I vowed to never repeat such an ordeal. But to keep that promise, I knew sometimes I’d have to fake it. Here’s what I did… Keep reading »
According to a new study published in the Journal of Sex Research, 28 percent of male college students admitted to faking orgasms during intercourse, oral sex and manual stimulation. The reasons guys pretended to orgasm were similar to those cited by the females — they wanted sex to be over, they wanted to please their partner, they felt pressure to perform. Blah, blah, blah. Men are sensitive and have insecurities, too. Obviously. I totally get why men would fake it from time to time. But how? What happens when a man has an orgasm is pretty specific, so I’m wondering how dudes are getting away with faking it 28 percent of the time? How do their partners not notice? Can they please do a study on that? Or can some guy who fakes it divulge his secrets by emailing me, oh, right now? [Blog Her]
OK, guys, think your wife or girlfriend isn’t faking it? Or that faking only happens in other people’s bedrooms? Think again. According to the recently published National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, 85% of men said that their partner had experienced an orgasm during their most recent sexual event, while only 64% of women reported actually having had an orgasm. The implication: Lots of women are faking it — and getting away with it. Read more…
I am about to share some very personal information with my fellow Frisky ladies: I had my first orgasm in a playground. No, it wasn’t some fantastic moment of bliss shared with a sexy or dashing incredible hunk while hiding away in a plastic tunnel or something. It was simply a couple of seconds of ecstasy, followed by momentary confusion after climbing and sliding down one of those metal poles usually positioned next to the swing set or slide. I was pretty young, so I didn’t really think much of it or contemplate the complexity of my experience, but research can finally explain what happened to me that faithful, play-filled day. Supposedly, there is such a thing called “coregasms” (because of its association with the abdominal muscles) and thousands of women claim to have experienced them while biking/spinning, weight lifting and, as no surprise to me, climbing poles or ropes! This find has researchers wondering, could exercise be the key to female orgasm? I definitely think so. Check out the article for yourself and tell me what you think. [Science Blog]
We love this study in female masturbation orgasms. Because, seriously, each one is totally different depending on your mood and and method. But orgasms can be divided into general categories. Click through to see diagrams of the different types of masturbatory orgasms. Starting with the standard “Good Orgasm”, which never, ever gets old. [Tempest Paige]
Gee G-Spot, you sure know how to disappoint a girl. First you exclaim your existence to the world. Then you hide as my fellow ladies are poked and prodded in search of you. One day you promise earth-shattering orgasms, the next you disappear without a trace. A recent review of over 100 studies into your existence has come to the conclusion that there is no proof of it. That you don’t exist. But I don’t think this is the last we’ll hear about you, g-spot. You’ll lay low awhile and then pop back up again, taunting us. Why do you continue to play these games with our emotions? Do you find it humorous that millions of us ladies spend days and nights pondering where you are? Keep reading »