Getting vocal during sex isn’t a crime—unless you live in England and the noises you make are so loud and disturbing, it “constitutes a statutory nuisance.”

Let’s get real about something. The female orgasm is a skittish mother f**ker. Most of the women I know say they cannot always come during sexual intercourse, and when they do, it’s only in certain positions, with certain things being stimulated. Some of the women I know can only come from oral sex, while others can never come at the hands of a partner, though they do just fine on their own. And in the interest of full disclosure, in hopes that you’ll share what makes YOU come in the comments, here’s what works for me. I can orgasm during oral sex, but only if I’m really, really comfortable with the person I’m with. One-night-stands and casual partners don’t have a shot, though I’ll still have a good time of it. I’ve only been able to come with one partner during sex and it happened a whopping TWO TIMES in our five-year relationship. How it happened, I dunno. It happened and then it was over and I was so psyched I forgot how to do it again. After the jump, eight women share what gives them the Big O.

The models in this Giulio Sciorio shoot are fully clothed (at least from the neck up), but the title of the spread, “Faces of Ecstasy,” makes an otherwise pretty PG editorial far more risqué. What do you think of these open-mouthed, closed-eyed strangers? Sexy or creepy? [via Trendhunter]

When the pharmaceutical company for whom she was working granted filmmaker Liz Canner permission to film behind the scenes, she thought she would make a movie about women, sexuality and pleasure. Instead, Canner’s documentary, “Orgasm Inc.” turned into a story about the cold hard cash that can be made from making women come. Or trying, anyway.

Jeebus. Why does everybody get so freaked out when adults dare to talk about teenagers masturbating, considering horny 13-year-old guys probably jerk off more than anyone in the world? Alas, there’s drama in Sheffield, England, because medical professionals are circulating a pamphlet to teens which suggests that self-pleasure might be more satisfying than, oh, having sex before they’re ready or getting knocked up. The pamphlet is called “Pleasure” and it says:

“An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away….Health promotion experts advocate five portions of fruit and veg a day and 30 minutes’ physical activity three times a week. What about sex or masturbation twice a week?”

Oh, joy! Margaret Cho visited “The View” this morning and dished all about how she cannot have an orgasm from intercourse, so she hightailed it to her doctor’s office to get a bead of collagen injected into her G-spot.

The G-spot shot didn’t work at all, unforch. But I’ll give you one guess as to what still does make Cho come! (Even pregnant and prudish Elisabeth Hasselbeck cracks a smile.) [via Jezebel]

Whoever thought of the premise for Katherine Heigl‘s orgasm in The Ugly Truth (her awful-looking upcoming flick with Gerard Butler) should be fired.

Hot blonde woman randomly receives a pair of remote control vibrating panties in a package at her front door, puts them on for a date, which somehow turns into a business meeting, and then starts orgasming in front of all her business colleagues when a little boy stumbles upon the remote control. Um, what? Bish, please! Like we said, pink slip.

Show them how it’s done, Meg Ryan. We compiled the best orgasms we could find on the YouTubes.

I’m willing to bet most of you have Monday mornings that go something like this: alarm goes off at 6:30 AM, you hit snooze 3 times before rolling out of bed at 6:49, you shower, get dressed, walk the dog, and then grab a banana or breakfast bar before heading out to fight traffic on your way to work. But what if you mornings began, say, lying “naked from the waist down,” in a velvet-curtained room, with your eyes closed, “while clothed men huddle over [you], stroking [you] in a ritual known as orgasmic meditation — ‘OMing,’ for short”? That’s exactly how a core group of 38 men and women start each day at a small commune in San Francisco called One Taste.

Sure, animal sex is weird, but humans are part of that strange kingdom.  Here are 10 Weird Sex Facts that prove we’re civilized here at the top of the food chain and yet still pretty freakin’ gross…

Hi, I’m Dr. V.  I’m not a real doctor, I just play one on the Internet. What I am is a lady, a lady who is a fool for love! And I love nothing more than sex. My deepest desires have happily led me on many adventures in the sack, but they have also, sadly, made me one of my gyno’s most valuable players. But I’ve lived to tell the tale(s)! So, from time to time, I will dish the dirt on everything from getting freaky to getting freaked out. Now, let’s get this party started…

This week’s “Doin’ It With Dr. V” was inspired by a letter I received from a lady who just doesn’t know how to switch things up with her man who has a specific regimen for getting off. So, I’ve got some tips for her on how to get him to cross the finish line—and in record time! As for the rest of you, keep those letters coming. You know I just love to read your smut too! To send me a question or suggest a topic for a future “Doin’ It With Dr. V,” email me!

Exercise does a body good—literally.  Forget feeling the burn, a new workout move called the coregasm will give you sheer pleasure while you tone your abs! That’s right, you can get off and get fit all with one easy move. Find out how, after the jump…

Cosmopolitan’s bread and butter is teaching women how to sex things up, in a billion different ways, which is precisely why we were shocked to read this cover line on their March Issue: “An Orgasm Almost Killed Her!” with the laughable tag, “We Are Not Kidding.” Are they biting the hand that feeds, or has their crack team of journalists finally found a dark side to doing it?

Hi, I’m Dr. V.  I’m not a real doctor, I just play one on the Internet. What I am is a lady, a lady who is a fool for love! And I love nothing more than sex. My deepest desires have happily led me on many adventures in the sack, but they have also, sadly, made me one of my gyno’s most valuable players. But I’ve lived to tell the tale(s)! So, from time to time, I will dish the dirt on everything from getting freaky to getting freaked out. Now, let’s get this party started…

Despite the big fuss made over virginity and sex, studies have show that 70-75% of women do NOT orgasm from vaginal intercourse. That leaves about a quarter of women who can and some people attribute that to the G-spot.  Now, there are a lot of haters who will tell you the G-spot is like Narnia or a UFO—a myth, an orgasmic tall tale. Helen O’Connell in 1998 theorized that it’s just an extension of the clitoris—although, at least she believes there’s something there. Shockingly enough, so little research has been done on the vag, it is practically like Area 51.  Back in 2001, the American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology published, “the evidence is far too weak to support the reality of the G-spot.” In 2006, the Journal Of Sexual Medicine said in 101 vaginal biopsies they didn’t find a single particular erogenous zone. Surprisingly, but in fact, the “G-spot” isn’t even an accepted part of the female anatomy according to the medical community. Pfft! While these academics can argue over its existence, anyone who has ever had sex with me can tell you there is no denying it! And in 2008, aray of proof/hope from researchers in Italy shined a light on the G-spot’s location and power.  Listen up: the G-spot is NOT the sexual version of Santa Claus. It really does exist!

In an effort to promote peace and reduce tension around the world, a bunch of peace-loving hippie activists are organizing a worldwide, simultaneous orgasm to synchronize with the two-hour period around the winter Solstice. If you want to join in the good times, set your motors for Sunday, December 21, between 6 and 8 a.m. EST, when the third annual Global Orgasm for Peace officially goes down. The bad news is you’ll have to wake up super early on a Sunday. The good news is: Yay, morning sex! This year’s global orgasm is especially meaningful after the election of Obama and a renewed sense of worldwide hope. “It’s the Global OOOBama Factor,” organizers state. Their hope is that a simultaneous world-wide orgasm will effect “positive change in the energy field of the Earth through input of the largest possible instantaneous surge of human biological, mental and spiritual energy.” But they caution against your own surge of spiritual energy resulting in a pregnancy, so if you’re participating with a member of the opposite sex, make sure you’re protected against pregnancy. ‘‘Remember,” organizers say, “over-population (6.8 billion people and counting) is a major cause of ‘peak everything,’ so please don’t make more babies in the Global-O.” [LiveNews.com.au]

Sure, you may be broke as a joke since Wall Street has gone AWOL, but don’t worry, the best things in life are free! Just look at those Lehman Brothers posting on Craigslist for free love—they’re not even paying for online dating. So while your taste may be caviar and champagne, remember, there are simple pleasures out there that even the most fancy people can savor—like desire, lust, and nudity. Save your moolah for the things you gotta pay for and cash in on the things you really need with these five sexy freebies.

1. Back Rubs: Now that you’re stressed about your financial future, you need to relax.  Nothing will get you looser than a massage…especially if it comes with a happy ending. Hey, I’ll scratch your back, if you scratch mine!

According to Dr. Sue Johnson (not to be confused with the old Sex Talk’s silver fox, Sue Johanson), there are three types of sex.  Short and sweet, long and aerobic, drunken and sloppy? Well, that’s what we thought!  But the doc breaks it down a little more scientifically. Sue says emotional presence is the biggest aphrodisiac and it defines the degrees of intercourse.  The freedom of speech you can achieve with a partner actually informs your Big O. With that in mind, here are the sexy levels of sex—whether you’re in a relationship or not—as Doc Johnson sees it, after the jump…

We’re not sure if the British NHS (National Health Service) is just trying to lower their state health care costs or get their employees laid, but the agency is saying that having sex is a cure-all catch-all, lowering your risks for everything from heart disease, cancer, and osteoporosis to the common cold. Ha! Finally proof that being slutty is good for you. (DUH!) But to get the full benefits of sexercise, as we ladies know, it’s got to be a release for both of you. And doing it right will even save you money on products. According to the NHS, orgasms prevent wrinkles from deepening, burn 300 calories an hour, make your hair shiny, and your skin smooth. O, it’s magic all right! [BBC]