open letters

An Open Letter To The Weather, On This Snowy First Day Of Spring

March comes in like a lion, and goes out like that feral cat that lives in the alley behind your apartment — yowling and salty as hell.

Megan Reynolds |

An Open Letter To The Squirrel I Saw Eating A Mini Corndog

Dear Squirrel,

When I saw you out of the corner of my eye scampering across the parking lot, I didn’t expect you to restore my faith in the…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To Fleece Leggings

Dear Fleece Leggings,

I wasn’t planning to buy you when I walked into a cute little boutique in East Nashville. In fact, I wasn’t planning to buy anything…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To People Who Go Balls Out On Halloween

Dear People Who Go Balls Out On Halloween,

I’m not referring to people who choose Halloween costumes that expose their testicles. If you are one of those people,…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

Law Student Feels Very Strongly About Classmates’ Snack Choices

Yesterday Jezebel got ahold of an email that had been sent out to 72 members of an Administrative Law class at a law school in Canada. The anonymous student who…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To Trader Joe’s Cookie Butter

Dear Cookie Butter,

I wasn’t aware of your existence until I was standing in line at Trader Joe’s a few weeks ago and noticed a display of jars…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To Whoever Stole A Goat From A Petting Zoo And Took It To A Bar At 1:30 AM

Dear Goat Thief,

Listen, I get it. There is nary a time when I watch a funny goat video or walk by the urban goat sanctuary by my…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To Sienna Miller’s Wardrobe Circa 2004

Dear Sienna Miller’s Wardrobe Circa 2004,

You don’t know me, but I know you better than I know many of my family members. Would you like me to…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To My Doppelganger

Dear Doppelganger,

A few weeks ago, I was taking a walk by my house and a random lady started yelling, “Jenny! Jennnnnyyyyyy!” from her porch. I looked around…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

Dear Ryan Gosling, Here Are 8 Reasons You Should Join The Backstreet Boys

Dear Ryan Gosling,

I know that it’s usually Amelia who writes you letters, but this week it’s my turn, because of some major news that just emerged: apparently…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To The Helpers

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To Whoever Was In Charge Of The Guest List For This Walgreens Opening Party

Dear Whoever Was In Charge Of The Guest List For The Upscale Walgreens Opening Party In Hollywood,

I’m sitting here at my computer, sipping my second cup of coffee,…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To The Fat Girl

Dear Fat Girl,

Last week, I saw an overweight news anchor respond to a bully with such power and confidence that it made me cry. It also made…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To My Boyfriend’s Mouthguard

Dear Mouthguard,

Listen, I don’t want you to take this letter the wrong way, because I appreciate your work, I really do. You valiantly protect my boyfriend’s jaw…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To Whoever Took The Baja Hoodie My Neighbor Left In A “Free” Box On The Sidewalk

Dear Whoever Took The Baja Hoodie My Neighbor Left In A “Free” Box On The Sidewalk,

When I saw that my neighbor had placed a Baja hoodie out…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To The Modern Man Who Wears A Monocle

Dear Monocle Man,

This morning, Jessica sent me a link to the Warby Parker website, alerting me to the fact that for a mere $50 it is possible…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To The Sorel Tofino Boot

Dear Tofino,

It’s always a little awkward to admit these things, but I know I’ll regret it forever if I don’t, so here it is: I have a huge…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To Justin Bieber’s Pants

Dear Justin Bieber’s Pants,

Sometimes I wonder what life must be like for you. I mean, just a few years ago you were making cameos in YouTube videos…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To Platform Shoes

Dear Platform Shoes,

I have an issue that I need to resolve with you, but I want to do it in a sensitive and productive way so I’m going…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |

An Open Letter To Kate Middleton’s Hair

Dear Kate Middleton’s Hair,

I know it’s kind of awkward to write you a letter, because, well, you’re hair and I’m not even sure that you know how…

Winona Dimeo-Ediger |
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