For a second, I was almost like, “Man, these OK Cupid profiles of Juggalos are too sad to even post.” And then I was like, “Wait! Actually, I’m a terrible person, I don’t care.” Sorry, but Juggalos are never not funny. The new Tumblr JuggalosOnOkCupid proves the point, by highlighting all the awesome Insane Clown Posse fans available and ready to take you on a date, Faygo and hatchet included. [JuggalosOnOkCupid]
In the summer of 2006, after having recently endured a breakup, I decided to bite the bullet, finally hopping on the online dating bandwagon. I chose Nerve as the site, and “Sara_B” and “This is really awkward” as my username and headline. Because, well, I am. And because, well, it was. I downloaded this one photo of me in a polka-dot dress and this other one of me in an absurd straw fedora and scoured the internet for someone to date.
I found him the very next day: LuckyJim_28. He had well-groomed facial hair, and those trendy, thick-framed hipster glasses. Nerve asked its members for a list of items they couldn’t live without, and LuckyJim_28 had written Martha Steward pie-crust mold and gun for killing Facebook friends who post about what they had for dinner. I found LuckyJim generally attractive, and the written answers to his profile genuinely amusing, and so I emailed him the following: “Hi there LuckyJim. Thanks for recognizing the level of self-absorption on display when one photographs one’s own food and uploads it on the internet. Also, I think you have nice glasses. – Very best, Sara B.”
His reply — “Well hello sara_b. Glad to meet a kindred spirit” – came later that same night. I liked the brevity of both the email and the response time – neither overly eager nor too hard-to-get – and after more back-and forths, we set up a date at a local bar. Keep reading »
“The internet has really changed the way people date. I just went to an OKCupid wedding. One of my really good friends met her fiancé on an OKCupid-style website. OKCupid’s really popular–all my girlfriends have joined. I love those sites. I go on and I pick the guys for my friends. I think it’s great … It’s online shopping! We all get together with our laptops and have a glass of wine. Then we message the guy … If I didn’t do what I do, I would do Internet dating instead of going out to bars. In two seconds I would. It makes so much more sense … No, [I don't date online]. Because, ultimately, what’s going to happen? I’ve never dated. I can say this honestly: I don’t know what it’s like to date. But also, how am I going to date? I’m not in one state long enough.”
–Mila Kunis talks about dating in Glamour. As complicated as dating is for a Jane Doe like me, I image it would be eons more complicated for a star like Mila Kunis. But is she really meeting guys in bars? I doubt it. Just please let the rumors about her and Ashton Kutcher be completely false. She does say that 99 percent of what we read in the ‘bloids in bulls**t and calls it “bullying.” I am taking that to mean that she’s not doing anything with Ashton. Phew. [Glamour]
Real talk: a lot of people are really bad at selling themselves online dating. Have you seen OK Cupid Enemies? Have you read Annals Of Online Dating? From their profile pics to their self-descriptions to their harebrained “what up girl i wanna get wit u” messages, they almost make it too easy.
Too easy to stay single, I mean.
So I’m going to suggest something uncomfortable: I’m going to suggest you show your online dating profile, everything in your online dating profile, to a trusted friend and ask for an honest assessment of what you’re doing wrong. Keep reading »
If you’ve ever heard anyone say “they look so cute together” and written it off as some magical fate-like bullshit that only romantic-comedy-loving girls would say, a new dating site called Find Your FaceMate might prove you wrong. That’s because they match people who they believe look good together.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it doesn’t get any more superficial than this. While sites like eHarmony use a 100-point check system to match couples based on legitimate commonalities, Find Your FaceMate makes matches based on people with similar looks. Read more …
For anyone who’s ever wondered what the downside to online dating is, allow me to present THIS GUY and his scary makeshift medieval weapon. And the other guys in this slideshow. And every other dude (and some women) on the blog OK Cupid Enemies, which collects truly abhorrent examples of singles currently on the market on the popular dating site. Prepare to be very, very scared. [OK Cupid Enemies]
Note: I have taken it upon myself to blur their faces, but OK Cupid Enemies does not.
I’ve promised my friends that whenever my dating prospects dry up, I will gather up my courage and make a new online dating profile. Well, my prospects are drying up at a rapid pace. Yet, I’ve made no move to get my electronic mojo going. Why? I’m not entirely sure. I really have nothing against online dating, I just know that I’m better in person. Also, I enjoy the challenge of having to drum up new dating business without making a profile. That, and my online dating experiences in the past have been, well, a little bit scarring. I’m not going to go into great details but I will give you three scenarios: Obsessed With His Cat, Wanted By The Federal Government, Told Me About His Sex Therapy. I realize that these were isolated incidents, but the thought of having to sit through a date that even remotely resembles any of these makes me feel trepidatious. In the meantime, I am dragging my feet, grasping at straws. Here are the things I’m currently doing to put off the inevitable for just a little bit longer. Keep reading »
You meet online. You have the same favorite book and it’s not The Fountainhead. You exchange emails multiple times a day and bond over your mutual love of cats, Frasier, and pretending you like to spend Sunday in bed with the New York Times crossword puzzle. It’s meant to be! The first date is around the corner. You’re bringing your lucky socks to the laundromat when…oops, you screw it up. They cancel the first date and now you’re dead to them. You spend Saturday night with your cat and a Frasier marathon. You use your Sunday crossword puzzle to line the litter box and spend the morning in bed, hugging your body pillow. Where did you go wrong? You may have made one of the following pre-first-date faux pas… Keep reading »
His teeny little profile picture was cute. He was the right age range and city. But when I opened the online dating message from this random dude, this is what he said:
Isn’t feminism a little obsolete? Men and women are equal nowadays. In fact, the balance is tipped in your favor.
Of all the things for a man to comment upon in my profile, he chose to kinda-insulted me by calling my belief system “obsolete”? I rolled my eyes. I hit delete. Another one bites the dust.
I’d been “negged.” Keep reading »
We talk a lot about online dating here at The Frisky, and have offered you a wealth of advice on how to write your profile, choose your photos, and suss out the potential of your various matches. So I’m sure it comes as a complete shock to learn that my profile is far from perfect. It’s well-written and funny, but there are a few areas in which I have been less than totally honest. Let’s take a look at five exaggerations or “untruths” (“lies” sounds too sneaky!) from my online dating profile, shall we? Keep reading »
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