Samhita Mukhopadhyay asked today on Al Jazeera: Can online dating ever be women-friendly? She talks in her op-ed about the challenges of online dating after your mid-30s, the rash of gross misogynist messages you can expect to receive as a woman on online dating sites, and how Tinder was intended to be woman-friendly, but can it really be woman-friendly if its creators don’t know what life is like as a woman and have, now, been accused of sexual harassment? She doesn’t mention sites like Straight White Boys Texting, which cull their content from Tinder users, among others, and which seems like a pretty pertinent point: Even if you “approve” of them based on their profile, you have no guarantee of how a potential date will actually treat you in real time.
Her conclusion is this pretty depressing last-stage-of-grief coping mechanism: “It’s as though the offensiveness on dating sites becomes a sorting mechanism, a virtual last man standing; only the last man is (hopefully) not a drunk sexist jerk.” My god. I mean, I know what she’s talking about. I’ve been there. It’s just that I was 25 and after four months of being on OKCupid the well of all right guys had already dried up and I couldn’t find anyone who was neither sexist nor duplicitous nor hyper-defensive (I expect from previous bad online dating experiences of their own). Keep reading »
Online dating can be a wonderful thing, and plenty of couples — including our own Jessica and her husband — have met and found love through sites like OK Cupid, Tinder and Match. But it can also be a complete and utter shitshow, especially for women. While there are plenty of cool single dudes to meet online, there are also loads of entitled, misogynistic assholes littering your inbox and refusing to be ignored. Our friends over at Whisper asked their female users to submit the worst messages they’ve received from men they refused to chat with and the results were sadly and unsurprisingly vile. Let’s hope these dudes spend the rest of their lives alone. Keep reading »
True facts: I’m still on OKCupid, mostly to gawk at people and to try to answer ALL THE QUESTIONS. I’ve answered 1503 of them. I’m behind.
That being said, I don’t think they’re always as to-the-point as they could be, and some of them are just plain bizarre (and they get weirder the more you answer, trust me on that). I have some ideas for questions that would make it easier for me to discern who should be my friend or not: Keep reading »
Meeting a mate online is not easy. At all. And anyone who’s used even a dating app can tell you a horror story or three. Your straightforward and basic account profile won’t catch potential partners’ eyes – instead, it’ll turn them off.
What matters? Well, according to statistics, it’s a mix of things we can’t control, how talk about ourselves and what we show off. It can be everything from race to your favorite sport. And while appearances matter more than ever to the online world, so does vocab … and where you take your profile picture.
Here’s what science says will get you in the door — and staying there. Read more on Your Tango…
It has been a few weeks since I called things off with The Teacher. Things just weren’t going in the direction I wanted, so I began my search again. Since then, I’ve been on a several dates with a couple of different women.
I define dating is the time before two individuals make their relationship exclusive. That time period is usually five or six dates for me; for other people, it may be a lot more. Since I go out with some women only one or two times, this means I end up dating several ladies simultaneously. Recently, I’ve started to wonder how many women is too many to date at the same time. Keep reading »
Welcome to our new weekly column Dater XY! Our anonymous MALE dater will be revealing the adventures and misadventures of finding love from a dude’s point of view. Let’s give him a big welcome!
With a high of four degrees and over a foot of snow, the weather was not fit for man nor beast. But I had a date, so off I went into the icy cold. I’d met The Teacher through an online dating site, like so many of us do these days. I had sent her a message to see if she wanted to share a drink, she accepted, and we met at one of my favorite restaurants.
Over dinner, we chatted about the usual first date things: where we were from, how long we’ve been in the city, music we like, if we enjoyed our meals, etc. The more we talked, the more our chemistry grew. Of course, the chemistry could have been the Malbec. But judging by the smiles on our faces, The Teacher and I had something more. After a few hours of flirtatious and witty banter, we paid our check and I walked her to a cab. Our next date was set in two weeks and I was a happy guy. Keep reading »