I like boobs. I’m a straight woman, but really, who doesn’t appreciate them? Robots. Reptiles. Sauron. That’s about it. And I’m not even positive about Sauron. He might have, at some point, before he was all disembodied. Breasts are awesome. As feminist writer Gail Collins said in her New York Times piece, “Everybody likes breasts — infants, adults, women, men. Really, it’s America’s most popular body part.” But sometimes it seems like we only get to talk about how awesome certain kinds of boobs are. The ones that are bold, perfectly round, Sports Illustrated-style, belonging to Christina Hendricks, full, plush, generous, prominent, and just generally big.
Those words do not describe my breasts, but I like mine anyway. For some reason, I never learned to be ashamed. I listened to my brothers (and the world) make enthusiastic comments about well-endowed women, and, although I had a few moments of “Seriously, God? Where’s the rest of my chest? YOU FORGOT SOMETHING,” I grew up generally liking the way I looked. It could be that there’s something wrong with my brain. But I think it’s more likely that small boobs are pretty great. Here’s why. Keep reading »
It seems like every five seconds, another celebrity nipple reveals itself. We can barely keep up with all the aureolas. So many nip slips, so little time! We only felt it proper, as the year draws to a close, to award the best, worst, and wackiest nipple sightings of 2011. Click through for the winners of The Frisky’s first annual Nip Slip Awards.
If fear of lung cancer or emphysema isn’t enough to make you quit smoking, do it for your nipples. Apparently, nicotine and carbon monoxide restrict blood flow to various parts of the body … like your nipples. According to plastic surgeon, Anthony Youn, M. D., smokers who undergo breast surgery are at great risk for having their nipples “turn black and fall off.” They just die. Guh! Youn once tried to bring a patient’s purple (about to turn black) nipples back to life by placing leeches on them. “The leech drains the old blood, causing it to turn from unhealthy purple back to healthy pink. We place leeches intermittently until the body part grows new blood vessels to do the leeches’ work,” Youn recalled. The image of this entire scenario is terrifying. [CNN]
It’s been a rough year for Demi Lovato. Rehab, drugs, cutting … and now a nip slip in front of a crowd in Dallas, Texas, recently. The 19-year-old’s nip slip happened when she leaned over in a tight fitting dress. Come on, Demi Lovato! Everyone knows that’s a bad idea. [Hollywood Life]
Sometimes nipples have a mind of their own and we just have to let them be free. Click through to see some more celebrity nip slips. Totally NSFW, for the record.
Let’s talk about nipples — specifically celebrity nipples freeing themselves from the confines of celebrity wardrobes. It happens all time! Usually we ogle and move on but sometimes unfortunate combinations of wardrobe, setting, and nipple make us want to wash our eyes out with bleach. When Nancy Grace’s nip made a guest appearance on “Dancing With the Stars,” we saw it … but we wish we hadn’t. “When we were doing our hopscotch portion of our dance, there was a little bit of movement but it did not rise to a wardrobe malfunction,” she told Entertainment Weekly. Sorry, Nancy, there was full nip exposure. The truth hurts. But it’s better than denial. Click through to see some celeb nip slips that made us feel uncomfie. [NY Post] Keep reading »
And now, a lesson in how to dress for your first day of community service at the Los Angeles Downtown Women’s Center, courtesy of Lindsay Lohan. Pick some short shorts and leopard print pumps. Pair them with a sheer black top. Make sure to skip the bra. I mean, if you’re sentenced to 480 hours of hard labor—at least your girls should be able to roam free? [Egotastic] Keep reading »
American Apparel‘s new swimwear ads are here and—OMG, are those nipples?! Yes, the gratuitously provocative ad department at American Apparel has brought us a topless model for spring. Let’s all pretend we’re freethinking Europeans and not have a cow about this, OK? Personally, I could care less about headlights in advertising, but the first thing I look for when buying a bathing suit is how am I not going to flash everyone. [Fashionista] Keep reading »
You heard it here first — the bra-less look is back, y’all! But are your nipples coming up short? If your chesticles are lacking a significant eraser-head erectness, Body Perks’ nipple enhancers will make your aureole look like they just experienced sub-zero temperatures. Now available in mocha! Check out a closer (vaguely NSFW) look at this can’t-miss product, after the jump. [$19.95, Body Perks] Keep reading »
A Finnish doctor is on trial for sexual molestation after using a highly unorthodox method to diagnose a patient. When a 20-year-old woman came into his office complaining of nipple fluid, the doctor says he “used an old midwives trick” to diagnose her. After asking her permission, he sucked on her nipple. Now it’s up to the Finnish Supreme Court to decide if his method was inappropriate. Way to go, Dr. Nipple Sucker, M.D. That’s about as creepy as it gets. [FOX] Keep reading »