Here’s a brief test of étiquette. You’re a writer accused of asking an inappropriate question to a famous actor in a national magazine. Another writer takes you to task for what she sees as a history of this kind of inappropriateness. Your response?
A) Ignore the criticism — you can’t please everyone, right?
B) Explain yourself — you really didn’t intend to offend.
C) Promptly imply that the other writer is jealous and unfuckable.
If you answered C, hey! You must be Andrew Goldman! Step right up here to accept this week’s Douchebag Decree.
What happened was this: Goldman compiles The New York Times Magazine‘s weekly “Talk” section, and on October 7, his subject was Hollywood legend Tippi Hedren, star of “The Birds” and “Marnie” and, as revealed in a new HBO movie, the victim of a pattern of harassment by director Alfred Hitchcock that ended up ruining her career. “The worst abuse happened after you rebuffed [Hitchcock's] advances,” asked Goldman. “Actors have been known to sleep with less powerful directors for advancement in show business. Did you ever consider it?” Keep reading »
The New York Times‘ Style Section inhabits a parallel universe in which wearing dresses during the hot summer months spawns a “trend piece.” For what’s supposed to be the most stylish, fashionable section of the newspaper, they’re delightfully behind the times on, oh, everything. So it is with an ugh in my chest that I read how they’ve turned their keen eye to what College Kids These Days are up to, namely checking into bars on FourSquare.
The Times checked in with several private colleges around the country with vibrant drinking scenes to find out what their most obnoxious upper-middle-class undergrads are doing. No ramen noodles here! The piece introduces us to a 21-year-old woman “fiddling with her orange Hermés bracelet” at a Cornell bar, female Gettysburg students who pregame with champagne, and ladies who order outfits off Rent The Runway because posting pics on Facebook and Twitter “makes wearing anything more than twice taboo.” I’m sorry, but who are these people? The real life cast of “Gossip Girl”? I remember free pizza at campus events being the goddamn highlight of the week. [For me, it was $3 pitcher night at the Avenue dive bar in "downtown" Santa Cruz. -- Editor] Keep reading »
Not sure if you saw this, but according to The New York Times, the totally on-top-of-it purveyors of the latest and coolest fashion and style trends, there’s a new hairstyle that’s been making waves. It’s called bangs. Have you heard of them? They sweep across your forehead and can cover between a third and one-half of your ugly face! They’re so handy and versatile, but also so fraught!
As darling Stephanie Rosenbloom cautions in her 1,000 word missive on the subject:
“Superthick bangs look great, and everyone wants them right now,” said the stylist Alan Tosler, a founder of the Tosler Davis salon in New York. “But if you have a cowlick in your hairline, they will not work. Or if you’ve got a superlow hairline.”
Or, if you are a monkey or some other kind of simian, and your entire body is covered in hair. Then bangs will absolutely not work. Keep reading »
riving in a Rolls Royce, getting a bodyguard, flying on a private plane: These aren’t normally things that New York Times financial reporter Kevin Roose gets to do. But as a guy who writes about billionaires, he wanted a chance to live like one for 24 hours, he explains in a first-person article. It’s a key “paradox” of our times: While many of us are furious at the rich, we’re still fascinated by them, he writes. Read more…
You know when your friend gets a boyfriend, and for whatever reason, you know it’s not a good idea and that it’s not going to work out? And you say “I dunno, I feel like it’s not a good idea, and that it’s not going to work out…” But your friend is stubborn, so obviously they go on dating the person anyway, despite all the signs that they shouldn’t, and then they have a fraught and complicated relationship that doesn’t even last that long, and after the inevitable break-up, you, the loyal friend, are forced to deal with sometimes years of emotional aftermath?
…reading this week’s Modern Love column in The New York Times was sort of like that. Keep reading »
Brooklyn, she is a squirrely strange beast. A land of artisinal cheeses and small-batch decorative axes. She is also a land where men occasionally deign to tuck their long hair into buns. This is newsworthy, so says The New York Times, which has devoted more than a thousand words to exploring the not-actually-a-trend tremd. It seems a writer for the paper visited a Brooklyn bar and saw two bartenders there who preferred wearing their long locks in a bun, rather than a hair net.
But really, how do you make this exotic hair bun — on a clunky, squarish man’s head, no less? Keep reading »