German electronic songstress Anika makes moody mysterious dance pop. Her latest track, “In the City,” is a ’70s disco-heavy number, and is accompanied by a head-turning video. A young girl is presented with several potential beaus who must audition for her. She chooses a partner based on the quality of their legs. Yes, their legs. The winner gets a bride, and as far as we can tell, a sheep’s head in a plastic bag. Not too shabby. [YouTube]
Maybe the rest of you are over Tanning Mom. I’m still way up in Patricia Krentcil’s blonde weave. She is and always will be the life of my party. Her latest single “Life of the Party” featuring Adam Barta does not disappoint. Please enjoy Tanning Mom making out with a drag queen, seductively eating a Pop Tart, singing about going to rehab with Michael Lohan and wearing an ill-fitting thong. Also, there’s a talking dog. Live it. Love it. Tanning Mom. [The Hollywood Gossip]
A good music video can make a mediocre song tolerable, but a bad music video of an equally bad song creates an aural singularity of fart-stained terribleness. These are the worst we’ve seen so far this year — and 2013 is far from over. Consider the following your State of the Union address for “Things That Will Make Two of Your Five Senses Atrophy,” or perhaps a sonic Cerberus of “Shittiest Song of Summer 2013.” In any case, we’re sorry. Read more at Cracked…
Y’all know I’m not a huge Bon Iver fan, and though he has wide acclaim as some sort of indie rock heartthrob, I find the idea of sexing Bon Iver to be as repugnant as, say, Frenching a trout. Last year, he unleashed his shoe collaboration with the shoe company Keep. What qualified Bon Iver as a shoe designer, I don’t know, but anyway, he made some sneakers with an (of course) feather on them. Just now, we’ve uncovered the commercial Bon Iver made to promote the shoes. It was apparently made on a farm with free-range kittens and pups (all of whom were rescued). It is also deeply earnest and Bon Iver-y, which of course means I had to blow up its spot. After the jump, Bon Iver’s imagined director’s commentary for the video. Keep reading »
Here’s what we know: Avril’s shooting a new music video; the theme is “Tank Girl”; Danica McKellar is making a sexy cameo; there is a good chance that Avril’s hands are permanently stuck in the devil horns position. So, there you go. [Daily Mail] [Photos: Splash News]
Sorry, but my productivity just went to zero because I’m going to spend the rest of the afternoon pressing the tiny David Hasselhoff button on my new favorite website, The ’90s Button. Click on the Hasselhoff icon, and a fresh ’90s video will get served up directly to you. So far, I’ve watched vids from Fat Boy Slim (“Funk Soul Brother”), Ini Kemoze (“Here Comes the Hotstepper!”) and, like, five Take That cuts. It just hit me with “Runaway Train” by Soul Asylum. This thing goes deep. Anyway, it’s been nice knowing you all, but this is my new life now. [The '90s Button]
Fiona Apple, what happened to your octopus? She should do all her music videos while wearing a cephalopod on her head. Maybe Paul Thomas Anderson, who directed “Hot Knife,” wouldn’t let her. Oh well. It’s still pretty good. By the way, that other woman in the video, facing off against Fiona? That’s her sister, the singer Maude Maggart, who also sang on Fiona’s new album The Idler Wheel… [SPIN]
Does watching David Bowie sit, strum a guitar, and stare menacingly into the camera for the better part of 3 minutes and 9 seconds sound like your idea of a good time? Well, it better, because I don’t want to know the person who answers no to that question. In stark contrast to the macabre religiously-themed visuals from the second music video off his new album, “Valentine’s Day” is pretty much just a video, rife with gun imagery, of a casually dressed David singing in a dungeon looking creepy as hell. It’s an appropriate and tasteful tribute to the song’s sensitive subject matter — the lyrics were inspired by the February 14, 2008 massacre at Northern Illinois University.