You thought your breakup was bad: a German lawyer named Tim Schmidt has accused his ex-girlfriend of trying to smother him with her breasts during sex. She has been charged with “attempted murder with a weapon” … the weapon being her 38DD breasts.
He Vogues especially well.
Plus, a bonus shot of Chris Christie’s epic moose knuckle!
Well, we knew it was coming, right? Rumors have been flying for months, nay, YEARS that Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner were on the verge of splitting, but today — a day after their 10-year wedding anniversary — the couple announced that they’re calling it quits for good.
“After much thought and careful consideration,…