Australian mining tycoon Gina Rinehart is really concerned about your welfare. That’s why Rinehart — who is considered the richest woman in the world, with an inherited fortune of $30.1 billion — helpfully offered her unsolicited advice on how to be stupid-rich, just like her. She says that the poors are just having too much fun and they need to buckle down and get serious if they want to stop being so disgustingly not rich.
“If you’re jealous of those with more money, don’t just sit there and complain,” she tsk-tsked. “Do something to make more money yourself — spend less time drinking or smoking and socializing, and more time working.” Ah! So that’s what I’ve been doing wrong — it’s my smoking and drinking problem that’s getting in the way of s-u-c-c-e-s-s. Keep reading »
One of the things I’ve learned, over my many years of roadtripping in and across Texas, is that hell is being stuck going 50 miles per hour behind a recreational vehicle. But recently, I’ve come to wonder if heaven might be being behind the wheel of one.
I don’t generally dream about buying big-ticket things like cars and houses. I’m a freelance writer, after all. At this point, saving even a few hundred dollars a year is a struggle — though that got significantly less stressful once I moved in with, and later married, my husband. Splitting rent and groceries and bills has taken significant pressure off my wheezing bank account — even more so than living with roommates.
So maybe that’s why I started letting myself fantasize about taking long trips to Marfa in a giant vehicle with a wildcat or a wolf emblazoned on the back. When I proposed this to Patrick, he was, as we say here in Texas, “raring to go.” Some couples dream of outfitting a nursery. Patrick and I dream of converting an engine to biodiesel and training the cats to ride shotgun. Keep reading »
Yesterday, I finally did something that I had been meaning to do for awhile: I walked into a Crunch Gym and canceled my membership. Which I had been paying for, for a year. And have never used once. Like, hadn’t even picked up my membership card. Pathetic.
When I think about how much money I completely wasted, I want to punch myself. Alas, it’s not the first time I’ve practically flushed my hard-earned cash down the toilet. I have made some truly stupid spending decisions over the years, and in an effort to never be so frivolously lazy again, I am going to share them with you. Feel free to make me feel better by the ways in which you have completely wasted money in the comments! Keep reading »
Some thoughts for Taylor Cotter (the 22-year-old girl who wrote about wishing she could be poorer on the Huffington Post):
Right now things kinda suck. I know. You wrote an oblivious-sounding piece about how you kind of wished you were getting the chance to be poor and scrappy in your 20s, like artistic people are supposed to be. Like the girls on “Girls,” which sometimes seems very realistic because Lena Dunham is the only young woman with any body fat on TV. And then the piece went up on HuffPo and then Gawker picked it up and now everyone is making fun of you.
My friend sent it to me. She was like “OMG this girl wishes she was poor!” and I was already worried about you.
I mean, maybe you’re totally OK and don’t even care. Maybe you’re laughing. But if you’re anything like me, I’m guessing you’re not. I’m guessing you’re more like, “Oh shit shit shit. No wait! I didn’t mean it that way! Wait, guys! I’m not that bad! I swear. I said that in a funny way. I was trying to make this point, and I was trying to illustrate it, and the piece is more about how we’re taught that being poor is cool when you’re an artist than about how I actually really wish I was poor. The piece is really more about the images we’re given of artists. And how it can be awkward not to fit the image, even if that means being more stable than the image. You know? Seriously! I’m not a bad person!” Keep reading »
Here’s a comforting thought: while our planet threatens to transmogrify into an Easy Bake oven, the world economy teeters on the edge of collapse, and Scientology is permitted to exist as a viable religion and way of life, there’s a 22-year-old out there who’s bummed out because she’s never been poor. Taylor Cotter, a 2012 graduate of Northeastern University, grieves the fact that just two months after completing her Journalism degree, she has an editorial job, a car, an apartment, and a 401k, none of which factor into the “10-cents-a-word” life she always dreamed of. It’s not surprising, coming from a girl who begins her lament, titled “A Struggle of Not Struggling,” by stating that “like most female journalists,” her only two inspirations in life were Carrie Bradshaw and Harriet the Spy, and it makes me wonder — has Cotter, who lives outside of Boston, ever actually been to New York City? Keep reading »
When you leave your house everyday to go to work or school, you assume that your cat is keeping things in order, right? Like, maybe he’s playing with a ball of string or has found the odd hair tie to chew on under your bed, but certainly he’s not doing anything terribly unseemly. Not so, say the makers of Ca$hCats.biz, a site devoted to chronicling cats with cash, drugs and guns. “I got a couple of New Year’s Eve photos that were way off the charts.” says Will Kleinart, who founded the site. ”They’d probably give PETA a heart attack. Literally, just, like, huge lines of coke and the cats near them with bottles of champagne in the background. And, of course, the requisite 20- and 50-dollar bills.”
What does it take to make a photo worthy of Ca$hCats? A stack of money and a cat, really. Check out a few more examples after the jump. [Vice] Keep reading »