We all feel a little crazy sometimes (for me, “sometimes” means at least three times a day), and while we’re big proponents of therapy and other structured forms of mental health support here at The Frisky, there are times when limited funds or busy schedules make it tough to get professional help. In honor of How To Deal Week, I thought I’d round up some of my favorite simple, effective, and — best of all — totally free ways to feel better when the going gets rough. Check ‘em out after the jump, and please feel free to add your own tips and techniques in the comments! Keep reading »
The word therapy conjures an image of a serious man with a steno pad taking notes while a patient reclines on a black, leather couch, talking about her childhood. I’ve been to therapy a bunch of times and never once have I reclined. One of my therapists was a tough talking Texan who threw a Kush ball with me as we spoke. Another was a completely bald little person who drank protein shakes and gave me existential philosophy CDs to listen to. Yet another liked to write possible solutions to my problems on a dry erase board.
While there are therapists who employ the whole reclining on the black, leather couch while you talk about your childhood thing, that’s only one kind of psychotherapeutic treatment available. If you’re not into that (I know I’m not!), don’t let it stop you from seeking out some support for your issues. There are many, many other approaches and types of therapy available. Depending on your personal preferences and what kind of issues you might want to tackle, you’ve got options. Many, many options. So many, that I’m only going to tell you about a few. Click on through for a very abridged breakdown of some of the most popular types of therapy available.
“Do you think I need therapy?” Evan asked. “I probably should start seeing a therapist.” He sighed and I shrugged.
“I can’t really answer that for you,” I said. “But it’s really helped me.” Evan and I had been fuck buddies off and on for over a year, but in the last few months we’d become better buddies and been doing less fucking, which, he told me, was how things usually went for him.
“Once I start to like a girl more as a person,” he had explained, “I’m less interested in having sex with her.” I looked at him like he was a little crazy, but whatever. His friendship was better than the sex, so if I had to choose between the two, friends it was.
“You seem to really know what you want in life,” Evan said. “You seem really in touch with, like, your issues. I don’t think I am.” And now, here we were, with Evan asking me if I thought he needed therapy. I do, by the way, but I think everyone does. Especially the guys I’ve dated and/or slept with. Many of them have gotten help for their various issues — crippling insecurity, narcissism, depression, anxiety, rage issues, etc. — but always after we’ve gone our separate ways.
See, I’m always the girl before the therapist. I’m a fluffier for mental health professionals. And it is fucking annoying. Keep reading »
This piece is presented as part of The Frisky’s How To Deal Week, in which we’re focusing on mental health issues.
I have five fingers on each hand. I use them like this: I hold up my thumb and whisper, “Thank You, Thank You, Thank You, Thank You, Thank You.” Then my pointer finger. “Thank You, Thank You, Thank You, Thank You, Thank You.” Then my middle finger, my ring finger, and my pinky. I give small kisses in between each “Thank You.” I do this five times for a total of 125 “Thank Yous.” Then I say “Thank You” for specific things, like how bright the sun is today or how soothing it is to feel my wet hair on my back. These I repeat just once for each finger. Then I thank G-d for his infinite wisdom, infinite grace, infinite compassion, forgiveness, and honesty—one accolade for each finger.
This is the prayer I say when I get on the subway in the morning. I have to say it.
“Or else…?” asks my therapist. Keep reading »
This piece by Jessie Lochrie was originally published on xoJane.com.
I can count the number of times I’ve had sex without condoms on one hand. This isn’t to brag about how I’m some model of safe sex — it’s because with the exception of a brief, two-week period, I have never been on birth control.
I’m not sure if I ever really made an active decision not to go on birth control. When I lost my virginity to my long-term high school boyfriend, we used those lubricated Trojans in the turquoise pack that so many people seem to use as My Very First Condom.
My reluctance to go on the Pill did partially stem from a teenager’s nervousness about telling my parents I was sexually active, though I always could have gone to Planned Parenthood (or my family doctor) and gone on birth control without them knowing. The real reason I avoided birth control was a gut feeling that I wouldn’t respond well to hormones. Keep reading »
Dr. Drew Pinsky is facing allegations that he was bribed and had accepted $275,000 to talk up the antidepressant drug Wellbutrin SR during his radio and television show “Loveline.” While hosting the shows “Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew” and “Sober House,” Pinksy made sure to discuss the benefits of taking Wellbutrin SR, including its ability to “increase libido,” but never presented himself as a representative of the drug company that makes it, GlaxoSmithKline. Keep reading »
A few nights ago, I watched a giant spider slowly creep across my bedroom wall, leering at me with eight beady eyes. I held my breath as its hairy legs traversed framed pictures, approaching me with increasing speed until it finally leapt off the wall and landed in my hair. I screamed and madly raked my hands through my hair, trying to get it off me. When it wouldn’t budge, I ran across the room in a panic, trying anything to untangle it from my hair, but suddenly there were more of them: little spiders streaming onto my forehead and lowering down into my eyes.
I woke up on the floor of my closet, hyperventilating, with a nasty scrape on my arm from where I had bumped into my dresser. This was the worst nightmare I’ve had lately, but it definitely wasn’t the only one. In fact, I haven’t gotten much sleep at all the past couple weeks… Keep reading »
You’ve noticed that your partner seems sad, irritable, or overly critical. Maybe he has expressed hopelessness or guilt. You have noticed a loss of interest in his usual activities, concentration trouble, or changes in his sleep pattern. All these could be signs that your man is struggling with some form of depression.
Depression isn’t only hard for him; mood disturbances also have a big impact on your relationship. But how do you bring up the subject? Many men have difficulty talking about their feelings in the first place. The prospect of having a mental healthdisorder is difficult to hear for anyone. Even gentle suggestions that the problem may lie within himself will likely not be appreciated.
As the saying goes, “People don’t care what you know until they know that you care.” So what can you do to help? Let me start by explaining what not to do.
1. Don’t say “Look on the bright side.” People with depression may have a long list of what is wrong with the world. You as a non-depressed person may not agree and will want to convince your partner otherwise. Read more …
As if the “mommy wars” need even more ammunition to make women feel bad about themselves: a new Gallup poll found that stay-at-home-moms were more likely to be unhappy than working mothers.
Gallup surveyed nearly 61,000 women between the ages of 18 to 64 who had at least one child under the age of 18. A quarter of SATMs said they felt a lot of sadness “yesterday” and one-fifth said they felt anger, compared with only 16 percent and 14 percent of working mothers, respectively. Gallup said SAHMs were more slightly more likely to say they felt stressed “yesterday” than working moms (50 percent to 48 percent) and more SAHMs said they had been diagnosed with depression as well (28 percent to 17 percent).
What does it all mean? Eh, probably nothing.
Keep reading »