I don’t get lady times once a month. In fact, I don’t get it ever. Due to babymaker problems that you’d prefer not to think about (trust me), I’ve been on a constant stream of birth control for six months so as to avoid more surgery. In short, my reproductive system doesn’t function. The factory has been shut down.
But because a few icky lady parts problems and surgeries just aren’t enough to deal with, I’ve also reacted badly to six different forms of hormones, becoming a bloated, mean, or moody mess after a few weeks on each. So last week, once the inexplicable crying had set in, my chest had inflated to monstrous proportions, and I felt the urge to kick small children, my doctor decided it was time to try my seventh variety of hormone. But rather than switching directly from the patch to the new pill, she told me to take a week off, complete a cycle and then get back to being The Amazing Period-Less Girl. Keep reading »
With all the advances in technology and medical research, it’s about damned time someone discovered a way to minimize or eliminate that inconvenient monthly scourge we ladies call our period. Or so drugs like Seasonale and Lybrel, which advertise their ability to reduce or annihilate a monthly period (respectively) would have you believe. As anyone who watches E! or SoapNet (what? You don’t watch “Being Erica”?) can attest, there’s been an explosion in the marketing of birth control pills that help you manage your flow, but the technology allowing a woman to do this has been around since the advent of the Pill in 1960. In fact, the Pill’s creators allowed specifically for a week-long sabbatical from the hormones that stopped you from ovulating with the specific intention of mimicking the body’s natural cycle, worried that women would balk at the notion of not having her trusty monthly visitor. But the fact is, if you’re on the Pill, there’s no reason to bleed. And yet some women still find the idea of not having a period exceedingly unnatural. So the question is: when you’re on the Pill, is your period really necessary? Two women weigh in, after the jump… Keep reading »
Yesterday, as I was flipping through People, I came across an advertisement that scared me to death. What was it marketing? Feminine hygiene products, of course. Because, I mean, what could be scarier than a period?! The Always Infinity ad features a dangerous tornado-like whirlpool swirling ominously into a gigantic maxi pad. A pad that, apparently, has the power to absorb ten times its weight— “so your heavy days won’t spin you out of control.” (If you care to see the full, 3-D, moving visual, check it out here.)
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Last year, Britney Spears totally embarrassed herself by acting erratic at an OK! Magazine photo shoot. She wiped her grease covered hands on a several thousand dollar dress. Her dog crapped on the floor, and Brit Brit used another dress to clean it up. Not to mention she once showed the world her period panties. Although Britney has cleaned up her act, she still doesn’t know what’s appropriate at a photo shoot. A spy for the New York Post, says the pop tart’s recent Elle shoot was a total disaster because she forgot about her period. Yes, Britney apparently ruined beautiful couture clothes with her menstrual blood. [NYPost.com]
I don’t know how this could happen to any adult woman. You don’t just forget about your period. There are several tell-tale signs, besides a bloody stain — sore breasts, cramping, irritable mood, or the fact that it comes every month, unless you’re pregnant or have some biological issue. Keep reading »