Tag Archives: men who cheat

Debate This: Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater?

This debate ran on The Frisky a year ago. Given the Tiger Woods controversy, we’ve decided to re-run it, so that the readers we’ve gained since can chime in.

We’ve all heard some variation on the maxim “once a cheater, always a cheater.” In my personal experience, the decision to heed or not to heed said aphorism seems directly related to just how sprung one is on the guy in question. But nine times out of ten, the truth will come out. And that truth generally involves a wandering eye.

I’m not the only one who thinks so. Relationship expert Dr. Gilda Carle, who’s written a book on the matter, How to Win When Your Mate Cheats, thinks that without the genuine desire to reform and a good therapist, a habitual cheater is doomed to repeat him- (or her-) self: “If they’re willing to put in the time and effort and acknowledge they have an issue, then there’s a chance they won’t cheat again. But if they think, ‘I can get away with this. My father was like this, my uncle was like this, all my buddies are this way,’ then you don’t have a shot in hell of reforming this guy. And no woman should try to reform a guy anyway because it’s a lost cause.” Of course, every relationship is different. Take a gander at two women who represent both sides of the debate, after the jump …
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If You Never Promise To Be Monogamous, You’ll Never HAVE To Cheat

I’m on vacation in the Outer Banks of North Carolina this week and that’s why I am really pissed at New York magazine for making their cover story in the newest issue be about something as enraging to me as men who cheat. Particularly men who cheat and BOO HOO don’t we feel sorry for them, because I just had to step away from the 1,000 piece puzzle I was working on to go off on a little rant about this topic when I should be meditating to the sounds of the ocean. Unfortunately, this piece, titled “What Makes Married Men Want To Have Affairs?” was so friggin’ annoying and depressing that I couldn’t help myself. Keep reading »

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