So we already know the “Melrose Place” thing didn’t quite work out for Ashlee Simpson. But that clearly hasn’t kept her up at night worrying about future career plans. Because she’s going to be a designer! She’s a celebrity, are you really surprised? Right, so her new collection is supposed to be a “mix of preppy and punk” apparently, and she’s totally sure her pieces will be huge sellers. Huh. If her new black hair is any indication of her clothing line inspiration, we’re dubious. [Us Weekly, Contact Music]

For those of you who’ve been watching the rebooted “Melrose Place,” you no doubt get a little giddy every time Ashlee Simpson-Wentz‘s character, Violet, appears onscreen. Violet is the daughter of the now-dead Sydney Andrews who’s majorly sketchy—on the last episode she seduced Sydney’s old lovah, Dr. Michael Mancini, and then gave him a heart attack by showing up as his nanny and threatening to tell his wife about their backseat escapades. With Ashlee, it’s hard to tell if (a) she’s a really bad, spazzy actress or (b) if she’s actually a really good actress who’s nailed playing a girl who is nutso, off-balance, and incredibly awkward in social situations. I’ve been inclined to think it’s the former, but you never know. Sadly, Ashlee’s ride on the show has come to an end.

Back in 1992, “Melrose Place” was a spin-off of “Beverly Hills, 90210” that was addictive and trashtastic, and yet no one was watching it. To boost ratings, creator Aaron Spelling brought in Heather Locklear from one of his other shows, “Dynasty.” After Locklear made her debut as Amanda Woodward, “Melrose Place” catapulted into must-see TV territory and a whole generation of women felt emboldened to dye their hair uber-blond while leaving their roots dark. Now, 17 years later, the CW’s remake of “Melrose Place” is doing the same thing. The first few episodes of the show have been fun, and yet, the show is not performing as well as “The Vampire Diaries.” And so, on November 17, Heather Locklear will be reprising her role as the boss from the hell—the one most likely to humiliate you in a board meeting and then sleep with your boyfriend. The word on the street is that she will somehow be related to Ella, who’s currently the show’s blond ice queen, a PR whiz who has her eye on engaged Jonah. [MSNBC]

Now that the drought of summer TV is over, there is a new swarm of drool-worthy actors on the small screen. No matter what your type is, there is a show specifically catering to your needs. “Melrose Place” boasts a cast of sketchy brooding dudes, but are they worth killing for? Equally brooding but more blood-thirsty is the cast of “The Vampire Diaries.” Then there’s the sweet, song-happy men of “Glee.” Which male cast has us the most smitten? Here’s who we’d shun, shag, and marry.

I didn’t need a crystal ball to predict that the CW’s updated version of “Melrose Place” was going to be kind of awesome. It seemed like Laura Leighton, aka Sydney, was going to be the major player on the show—she was sprawled out in a chaise lounge in the center of the show’s cast promo pics, which was confusing because any “Melrose” addict knows that she died in a car crash on her wedding day back in the ‘90s. Turns out that she only faked her death, with the help of Dr. Michael Mancini, and now has come back to be Melrose Place’s landlord. She was already, of course, sleeping with one of Melrose’s tenants, David—conveniently, Michael’s son. But then, just a few minutes into the episode, Sydney was floating face-down in the infamous Spanish-tiled pool. She’d confessed to David that she’d done something “really, really bad” and no doubt she’ll become this show’s version of Laura Palmer—the season will be about figuring out who killed her. Was it Michael, who wanted to keep her from telling his wife that they’d been boning? Was it David, who was pissed she was also getting it on with his dad?

Alright, people. Get your couch cushions fluffed, your pillows prepared, and set a stack of menus by your phone, because you’ll want to call in delivery. This is one of the biggest TV weeks of the year, with oodles of new shows and season premieres of the ones that already have their crafty hooks in us. From “Melrose Place” to “Glee” to “The Vampire Diaries,” here are the shows that have us giddily waiting for prime time.

As if news of a rebooted “Melrose Place” weren’t bad enough, Michael Ausiello of Entertainment Weekly is reporting that Ashlee Simpson has been cast in this epic s**tshow. According to The Aus, Simpson is slated to play country bumpkin Violet, “a character whose disarming naiveté masks the calculating, shrewd sex kitten within.” In plain talk, she’s gonna be Sydney 2.0. It takes some doing to be outraged by this apparent threat to the integrity of a show that regularly featured poolside cat fights and characters with lobotomies, but surely MP’s legacy deserves more than this. Thoughts?

We were loyal fans of the sexy nighttime soap opera, “Melrose Place,” so we are so excited it’s getting a facelift and coming back to television.  However, after the hack job they did on the new “90210”, we are very afraid about what the CW network might do to the other delicious Aaron Spelling drama! We want to help them help us.  Here are the actors that would make us stay home to watch (and drool over) Melrose Place 2.0, after the jump.

Before she was Bree on “Desperate Housewives” Marcia Cross was the infamous Dr. Kimberly Shaw on Melrose Place. Bitch was over-the-top psycho and the world loved it. Enjoy her most infamous scene, above.

Gossip Girl delved into major Melrose Place territory when (SPOILER ALERT!!!) it was revealed, kind of, sort of, that Serena may have killed someone and that’s what evil Georgina is holding over her head. Whatever. The reason to watch last night was to finally see, once and for all, which character was going to come out of the closet. We’ve known for weeks that it was going to be Serena’s lil’ bro, but it was a nice added touch that he’s been snogging Jenny’s posh boyfriend. Also, Jenny is really falling from grace in our eyes, by actually going along with the dork’s plan to pretend the two are sleeping together—which would “raise” her social status and keep his gayness quiet. Anyway, here’s a clip from the episode when that infamous gay bomb is dropped.

Andrew Shue—‘member him? The resident Melrose Place hottie, founder of early 90’s non-profit Do Something, brother of actress Elizabeth Shue?  Well, he was back on TV this week, looking finer than a grain of California sand, campaigning for Barack Obama.  Shue isn’t just another actor throwing his two cents into the political ring—he’s a lifelong activist with clever, optimistic things to say that sound better than he even looks after all these years. It’s a pleasure to watch polysyllabic words slide out of his mouth! But Shue is more than just a nice, socially conscious, hot piece of ass; the Dartmouth grad cares about women and founded the largest social networking site for mothers, cafemom.com. Smart, sensitive, sexy, and he likes drama—this is man we can all keep our eyes on. [The Huffington Post]