Yes, McDonald’s French fries are very dangerous in the sense that you could inhale a super-sized order in the blink of an eye. But also, they can be physically dangerous, as demonstrated by a woman in Bordeaux who was seriously injured by one of the delicious potato wedges. Let this be a cautionary tale.
It started as most fast food kerfuffles do; with hungry people and slow customer service. An unidentified, angry patron tried to launch a French fry, missile style, at a McDonald’s employee. Presumably as a signal for the McDonald’s staff to get going on the Big Macs? But the aim was off, and instead of pelting the employee with a potato torpedo, it hit a female diner in the eye. The woman was rushed to the hospital with a scratched cornea and told to stay home from work for the next 10 days. Police are still trying to track down the French fry assailant. I guess this is what our parents meant when they told us not to play with our food.[Cybergazing]
Adult Swim, the deranged nocturnal twin of Cartoon Network, is a pleasant, hilarious reprieve from the mostly squeaky-clean nature of cable TV. The Wikipedia page cites “minimal or no editing for content,” which sounds about right: there are precious few things that are deemed too risqué or outlandish for the nightly programming. One of these things, apparently, is this clip from “The Eric André Show” of Andre as a drunken Ronald McDonald hitting up his local McDonald’s, which the network refused to air. Granted, the rejection was based not off content or legality but concern for the future of Cartoon Network’s ad sales (they have a deal with the fast food chain for Happy Meal toys) should the footage be okayed. Andre appeared on “Conan” last night and brought the scrapped video along with him, which of course Conan had no problem airing himself … [via Huffington Post]
A horse is a horse of course, of course, unless the horse is a horse that just really wanted a Big Mac from McDonald’s. An unnamed woman in Manchester, UK, tried to take her horse through the drive-thru of her local McDonald’s, but staff there refused to serve her. So, instead, the woman decided to bring her horse inside the Micky D’s. A girl riding a pony accompanied the woman, because every horse needs a pony, right?
The horse, said police, “ended up doing his business on the floor.” (See above photo for reference.)
“The sight and smell of this caused obvious distress and upset to customers trying to eat, as well as staff members,” said a rep for the Greater Manchester Police. The woman was charged with the quaintest British offense ever: “causing alarm.” [BBC]
She was lovin’ it a little too much. Manatee resident Christine Faith Baker, 47, was arrested after she allegedly offered sexual favors for two McDonald’s dollar-menu cheeseburgers, according to the Miami Herald.
An undercover officer invited Baker into his car on Friday and started talking about sex. Baker allegedly said that her fee was two McDoubles — the dollar-menu version of a double cheeseburger — costing a grand total of $2.75. Read more …
What happens when you offer oral sex in exchange for an order of McDonald’s Chicken McNuggets? I’m sure you’ve asked yourself this very question a number of times as you passed the golden arches, dreaming of eating an order of heavily processed chicken product, but not quite being able to scrape up the $3.41 for the luxury. We’ve all been there. But who among us has had the guts to find out?
Los Angeles woman, Khadijah Baseer, had the courage to find out. The 31-year-old stood outside her local Mickey D’s drive-thru and told a number of male customers that she would blow them if they bought her an order of Chicken McNuggets. Her venture did not go well. She never got any nuggets. All she got was a lousy misdemeanor solicitation charge. We admire her for trying. We dearly hope she was at least trading her services for a 20-piece nuggets. Otherwise she was severely devaluing herself. [Oddity Central]
In a completely unofficial and gross experiment, one brave (or bored?) Redditor put McDonald’s and KFC fries in airtight jars for three years just to see how they would age. Well, no doubt Mickey D’s fries have better genes. Or do they? The French fry researcher points out that “this test is meaningless [because] too many variables are unknown to make any sort of call.” Fry guy goes on to say, “If anything, I’d be more afraid of the KFC fries because this indicates they might have been contaminated with bacteria or mold or were improperly cooked.” But wait, does the lack of mold fur on the Mickey D’s batch mean that there was some kind of crazy synthetic chemical that they’re treated with? Never mind. I don’t want to know. It doesn’t matter. I’m never eating fast food French fries again. [The Daily What]
A fight broke out at an Indiana McDonald’s yesterday … over an ice cream cake. Police were called to the scene when a woman slapped one employee and threw ice cream in the faces of others. I know what you’re thinking and no, this was not one of those staged food fights or a clown show for a child’s birthday party. So what enraged the suspect to the point of assault with a deadly ice cream cake? Allegedly her cake, which the McDonald’s employees agreed to keep in the freezer, had melted. Well in that case … [WFIE] Keep reading »
This fashion editorial from Pilot magazine, shot by photographer Guy Coombes, is making us never want to eat fast food ever again. Ever. [Show Us Your Stache] Keep reading »
Although Prop 19, legislation that would have legalized marijuana in California, didn’t pass on Nov. 2, a new controversial bill has just gone into effect in the state: San Francisco passed an ordinance yesterday that prohibits toy giveaways in fast-food children’s meals that have more than 35 percent of their calories from fat. Yes, kids, that means no more free toys in Happy Meals. Public health advocates see this as a victory in their battle to stop the fast-food industry from marketing to kids and as a major step forward in curbing childhood obesity and diabetes. Though San Francisco is the first city to pass such a law in the U.S., it’s expected that many cities will soon follow suit.
Really? This news makes me kind of sad … Keep reading »