Nothing is quite so entertaining as people who don’t recognize their own hypocrisy, huh? Recently, our hero, Oklahoma State Sen. Constance Johnson (D), introduced an “Every Sperm Is Sacred” law to try to outlaw male masturbation. Legislators in OK have been concerned with banning abortion rights, including a “fetal personhood” amendment which would define a fertilized egg as a person, thereby criminalizing all abortion and IVF treatment. So, Sen. Johnson thought politicians should turn their attention to all the poor little spermies being spanked out in the shower. ”If we’re taking about protecting life, then let’s talk about life at it’s very basic beginning,” she told “The Daily Show” last night. Keep reading »
“You know, Sally shouldn’t be masturbating at other people’s houses or she’s going to get slapped.”
– January Jones defends Betty Draper — specifically her decision to smack tween daughter Sally after she was busted diddling herself at a neighbor’s house — in an interview with The Daily. You know, I could easily write, like, 1000 words on why this quote annoys me, especially because it pretty clearly reads like January is also speaking for herself and not just her ’60s-era housewife character, but I’ll keep it brief… Keep reading »
Perhaps by now you’ve heard about the trouble Invisible Children founder Jason Russell found himself in last week: Amidst all the controversy and criticism surrounding his “Kony 2012″ video, Russell was detained on Friday, after witnesses spotted him naked and masturbating on a street corner in downtown San Diego in the middle of the day.
Russell was taken into custody and placed in an involuntary 5150 mental health hold (the same one Britney Spears was placed in) after several callers reported him dancing and pounding his fists on the ground, beating on cars, screaming and yelling incoherently. No charges have been filed against him.
Given the spate of criticism and discussion around Invisible Children and the KONY campaign, we thought we’d see what we could find out about Russell himself.
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We love this study in female masturbation orgasms. Because, seriously, each one is totally different depending on your mood and and method. But orgasms can be divided into general categories. Click through to see diagrams of the different types of masturbatory orgasms. Starting with the standard “Good Orgasm”, which never, ever gets old. [Tempest Paige]
As mostly heterosexual ladies, we’ve had to fear/admire Fleshlight from afar. The silicone vagina slightly horrified us, especially the ones modeled after adult film actresses. Then again, if we’re here wishing upon a star that vibrators rain from the sky, why shouldn’t men enjoy sex toys, too? It’s only fair. Now the tech blogs Geekosystem and Gizmodo report Fleshlight is developing an iPad attachment to make masturbating to porn on your tablet even easier: it attaches onto the iPad like a regular iPad case, but there’s a fake p**sy attached to the end. Messy is the first word that comes to my mind. Little birds tell me that Fleshlight needs lube to achieve that authentically vaginal feel. I don’t know about dudes, but I keep lube bottled up around my $500 toy. [Gizmodo via Geekosystem]
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“I don’t get down with jerking off, dude. Look. I don’t believe in everything that the church says. I try to do the right thing. I lead a clean and pure life. I’m a married guy. I have a beautiful wife. Sex is not the most important thing to me, being horny all the time, spanking the — I mean, it’s not against the law. You can do whatever you want. And it’s not like, ‘I shouldn’t do it because of my faith. I’m just not really that into it that much anyway.”
In addition to assuring the masses that had he been on a hijacked 9/11 plane, “it wouldn’t have went down like it did,” Mark Wahlberg wants you to know that he’s not that into jerking off. Thanks for sharing, Mark! Now go back to shoving your foot in your mouth. Read more quotes from Mark’s Men’s Journal interview at the link. [Evil Beet Gossip]