Tag Archives: marriage

Dear Wendy: “I’m Ready For Marriage, My Boyfriend’s Not”

My boyfriend and I have been together for a couple of years now, and have lived together for a year and a half. We have a very solid and fulfilling relationship. We also bought a house together a little while ago. Everything is great except for one issue: marriage. I feel as if I have given everything I can into our relationship, mentally, physically and emotionally. And now I feel as though I need a commitment to go further. He says that he knows he wants to marry me, has promised, but is not ready. We live as if we are married so I don’t know how he can’t be ready. He says he doesn’t feel an urgency to get married, but I do. I worry that “not ready” means “not with you” although he swears it doesn’t. We’re at a stand-still with this issue and I’m not really sure where to go from here. — Ready For Marriage

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How To Survive Being “A Little Bit Married”

The other night, I was having dinner with a friend, and over dessert she mentioned how unusual it is that I’ve never lived with a significant other. I’d never really thought about it before, but she’s right—I can only think of one or two friends who haven’t shacked up with a boyfriend or girlfriend. But even though I’ve never lived with anyone, I have had two relationships that reached the four-year mark. There’s no denying that relationships have changed now that the average man gets married at age 27.1 and the average woman gets hitched at 25.3. In 1970, less than half a million married couples lived together—today, more than five million do. Which means that almost every 20- or 30-something has been through one, if not more than one, phase of being quasi-married. Journalist Hannah Seligson has written a new book about this phenomenon called A Little Bit Married: How To Know When It’s Time To Walk Down The Aisle Or Out The Door. Since she’s interviewed hundreds of people in serious long-term relationships, we thought we’d get her to answer a few questions from readers. Check out her answers after the jump. Keep reading »

Woman Getting Married: The Holidaze Are Over

We took down the Christmas tree this week, along with all our holiday stuff (a penguin with a Christmas hat, a reindeer doing a split), which means the holidays are officially over.

The visit with the FIL (future in-laws) over Christmas went well for the most part, if you discount the fact that Future Husband and I both ended up in the Urgent Care center. Before we left for Ohio, FH had a 102 temperature. It was better the next day so we decided to make the drive up there, but he just never felt 100%. Then I came down with a tonsil infection … before you knew it, we were being seen by a tiny Indian doctor who thankfully prescribed us some antibiotics. Keep reading »

Forget Me Knot Rings

Not sitting around waiting for an engagement ring from Tiffany? Can’t stand traditional when it comes to getting to the altar? The Red Sole Bride recommends these adorably sentimental Forget Me Knot rings by WhiteFly on Etsy. Cast from real string, this reminder from your betrothed or beloved will ensure they forget you not. The silver is a recession-friendly $65, while the gold will set you back a still-reasonable $425. [Red Sole Bride] Keep reading »

Tiger Beat: Relationship Experts Have Whack Advice For Tiger And Elin

Ever since the s**t hit the fan between Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren, the whole world—and all of Tiger’s mistresses, which is practically the whole world—has something to say about this colossal scandal. US Weekly has gone as far as to get some unsolicited advice from relationship experts for the couple. After the jump, here’s what the best and brightest are advising for this wreck formerly known as a marriage. [US Weekly]

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A Wedding Video To Die For


If you have a wedding video, I am sure it is very lovely, beautiful, and romantic, but, my God, this is a wedding video for the ages. I’m not really up on all things wedding video-related, but I kind of thought they were boring, hand-held affairs that the newly married forced their unmarried friends to watch as some kind of passive-aggressive punishment. The wedding video of model/actress Roselyn Sanchez and model/actor Eric Winter is another story altogether. Held at a historic fort in San Juan, Puerto Rico, it is probably one of the most glamorous and romantic weddings I’ve ever seen, and the video is a really sweet and gorgeous homage to the couple, their union, and their guests. I’m verklempt, people! [The Red Sole Bride] Keep reading »

“So You Think You Can Dance” Was Good For My Marriage

When I started watching “So You Think You Can Dance,” my husband gave the entire living room a wide berth. He’d hear Mary Murphy’s banshee-like glee at putting a dancer on the “hot tamale train,” and off to headphone land he’d go. But, summer had just started, my graduate school employment had just ended, and it was the beginning of the recession. TiVo meant I could watch the show whenever I wanted. There was no escape for him. Keep reading »

How Typical: I’ve Been Gaining Weight Since Getting Married

Before my wedding this past July, I did a lot of cliché things that many other brides-to-be all over the world do. I fretted over the guest list, stressed over what to wear and how to do my hair, and worried endlessly over correct etiquette. One thing I didn’t get too worked up about was losing weight. It’s not that it wasn’t on my mind — getting fit was certainly something I thought about — I just honestly didn’t do much to get there. I’ve always been a stress eater and planning a wedding sent me running for all the comfort food (and booze) I could find. It wasn’t until a few weeks before the wedding when I worried I might not be able to squeeze into my dress that I joined a yoga studio and hit the mat about four times a week. Luckily, with the help of those last-minute workouts and a special Spanx-like undergarment, everything worked out. Since then, though, I’ve relaxed back into my unhealthy habits and started “letting myself go.” Apparently, I continue to be a cliché even after the wedding. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: My Husband Paid Off My Loans, Now I Feel Indebted

Recently, a wonderful, terrific, incredible thing in my life happened, but I’m still having a little trouble embracing the good news. Two weeks ago, my husband of four months dipped into his life savings and paid off the remainder of my student loans. This was no small feat, of course; the amount left on my loans for graduate school were big — enough to finance a luxury car, or an extended trip around the world, or serve as a down payment for a small New York apartment. Instead, Drew, my husband, used the money to pay off a debt I’d accrued before I even met him, a debt I lost plenty of sleep over wondering how I’d ever crawl out of. That, in the end, I had this modern-day version of a knight-in-shining armor come rescue me, the damsel in distress, is something that’s stirred a complicated mix of emotions in me, most prominent among them gratitude, but certainly a large dose of guilt and shame as well. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: I Got Married For Health Insurance

I’d never been one of those girls who’d dreamt about her perfect wedding. The virgin-white dress, the exorbitant costs, the fuss over a big, shiny rock — none of it ever appealed to me. I wanted to find a lifelong partner, and a family sounded nice, too, but honestly? I never cared much about that piece of paper. So why did I just marry my boyfriend after pondering it for a mere two hours? One (evidently all-too-common) reason: health insurance. Keep reading »

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