Funny thing about March Madness — it’s now April! But we’ve made it to our final two, bat shit nuts competitors. And it’s a political crazy-off as the lady-loathing state of Arizona goes head-to-head with slut-shaming Rush Limbaugh. So, who is the coo-coo for cocoa puffs champion? You decide!
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It’s come down to this. The Final Four. (There’s still time to vote for either Rush Limbaugh or the Pee Drinker, by the way!) And what an interesting matchup this one is: a state that is intent on making sure getting and remaining pregnant are the sole options for sexually active women versus a sex toy for men that mimics the, uh, feeling of having sex with a pregnant woman’s vagina. So, you tell us — which is crazier? Vote now!
Whoa, we’re getting down to brass tacks here. In one corner, we have Noted Cro-Mag and All Around Conservative H.R. Puff-N-Stuff Rush Limbaugh. Limbaugh’s been blathering over the airwaves for years, spewing his particular brand of toxic anti-lady crap. It’s Rush’s completely bombastic misogynistic drivel that’s taken him all the way from the Sweet 16 of our Real March Madness competition down to the Final Four. And what with the drama of Slut/Whoregate 2012, it’s really been a banner year for Ol’ Rush. Even so, does Rush have the stuff to take on what might be one of our most bonafide wackadoodle entries in the competition? I’m talking about Carrie, the cancer-stricken woman who appeared on “My Strange Addiction” to detail how she drinks her own pee in order to stave off the disease. There’s being a jerk and then there’s being absolutely off-the-rails delusional. So, you tell us — which is crazier? Vote now!
After Round One of our Real March Madness competition, Courtney Robertson’s man-ipulating ways stole Phaedra Parks’ relatively harmless thunder. Meanwhile, Arizona’s desire to allow doctors to lie to pregnant women about fetal birth defects trumped Virginia, with their fetal personhood and transvaginal ultrasound bills. At the end of the day, which is the crazier threat?
Who/What Is The Craziest: Lady-Hating Arizona Or Bachelor Vixen Courtney Robertson?
- Arizona's cruel craziness! (88%, 395 Votes)
- Courtney Robertson's conniving craziness! (12%, 55 Votes)
Total Voters: 450
Your votes have been tallied. The results are in! In Round One of our Real March Madness, Lindsay Lohan and her Terry Richardson-lovin’ self clobbered Paz De La Huerta (of the Elvis ghost orgasm), while the pregnant woman fleshlight out WTF’d those manties made of beef jerky. Now Lilo and the Knocked Up male masturbator will go at it in Round Two. My God, that sounds wrong. How to compare them? Well, they are both missing a brain. The preggo fleshlight, well, because it doesn’t have a head. And Lilo, because she fried hers. Even though she claims to be sober, we’re not so sure. Who/what is crazier? You tell us! Vote!
Who/What Is The Craziest: Hot Mess Lindsay Lohan Or The Pregnant Fleshlight?
- The Pregnant Fleshlight! (55%, 241 Votes)
- Lindsay Lohan! (45%, 199 Votes)
Total Voters: 438
The Real March Madness, Round Two: “My Strange Addiction”‘s Pee Drinker Vs. Teen Bride Courtney Stodden
In Round One of our Real March Madness, Carrie, the cancer-stricken woman who treated her illness with medically-unproven “urine therapy,” won the “Strange Addiction” matchup, while Courtney Stodden trounced Courtney Love in the battle of the Crazy Courtneys. Now the pair face off in Round Two. If they have anything in common, besides being nutso, I’d say it’s that both are extremely devoted to their crazy choices in life — Carrie stands by her decision to ingest urine through every bodily orifice, while Courtney Stodden married way, way older Doug Hutchison and hasn’t looked back. So who wins this battle? Vote!
Who's The Craziest: Carrie The Pee-Drinker From "My Strange Addiction" Or Teen Bride Courtney Stodden?
- Carrie, the urine therapy enthusiast from "My Strange Addiction"! 'Nuff said. (52%, 441 Votes)
- Crazy is Courtney Stodden's middle name! (48%, 403 Votes)
Total Voters: 844
After Round One of March Madness, it seems that our fair friend Rush Limbaugh trounced his conservo-pal Kirk Cameron. He beat Cameron in the crazy competition by nearly 6 to 1. Rush’s anti-woman, anti-slut diatribes now go up against our favorite honey boo-boo child, Alana, the Go-Go Juice chugging beauty pageant tyke from “Toddlers and Tiaras.” Rush would no doubt be disgusted by Alana’s antics, and Alana would likely be completely immune to Rush’s taunts (whatever you say about her, she does have insanely high self-esteem). But whose existence is more mind-boggling? More utterly confusing and bewildering? Vote!
Who's The Craziest: Rush Limbaugh Or Alana From "Toddlers And Tiaras"?
- Rush Limbaugh's slut-shaming is the ultimate in crazy talk! (74%, 467 Votes)
- Alana and her go-go juice steamroll the competition! (26%, 165 Votes)
Total Voters: 632
The thing that defines these two reality show nutters is their penchant for ridiculous one-liners. “I was as crazy as a vampire in sunlight,” “Real Housewives of Atlanta” star Phaedra Parks proclaimed about giving birth. “Winning!” Courtney Robertson cried as she capably seduced “Bachelor” Ben Flajnik. But that is where the similarities in their craziness end. Courtney is cold and calculating, while Phaedra is a self-described “Southern belle.” Courtney set her sights on winning the heart of a fratty winemaker, while Phaedra’s goal is to own a funeral home. Who do you think is the nuttiest reality TV fruitcake?
Who Is The Crazier Reality TV Cast Member?
- Courtney Robertson is "Winning!" this one. (62%, 198 Votes)
- Phaedra Parks is the belle of this ball. (38%, 123 Votes)
Total Voters: 320
First, there is Ayanna, who is addicted to growing out her toenails. She looooooves her toenails so much, and has gotten them to crazy lengths. Beyond crazy lengths. But the kicker? Her toenails are only part of the problem. She’s got redonkulously long fingernails, too, that cascade down and curl around. How does this woman get anything done? And then there’s Carrie, a cancer-stricken woman who believes that drinking her own urine — and bathing in it, and using it as a beauty treatment, and brushing her teeth with it — is the key to curing her disease. Both were featured on “My Strange Addiction,” and both had, we’ll say, “problems.” So which is the stranger strange addiction?
Which Is The Crazier Strange Addiction?
- Carrie's urine therapy is crazy gross. (88%, 506 Votes)
- Ayanna's extra long toenails cross the crazy line! (12%, 70 Votes)
Total Voters: 576
We have nothing personally against the states of Arizona and Virginia, two fine locations in the lower 48. Arizona is home to the Grand Canyon, and our own Ami Angelowicz was born and raised there. Virginia is the proud state that brought us Thomas Jefferson’s Monticello and the Smithfield ham. However, when it comes to those of us with a vagina, these two places have been the worst lately. Read on to vote in our Real March Madness poll! Keep reading »