You can hear Mama June use her very original euphemisms as she gives the girls a talk about the birds and the bees on tonight’s season premiere of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.” If it’s unclear, the fruit loop is part of the biscuit, which is a part of the woman’s “privatal area.” It’s called a fruit loop because “guys go loopy over it.” Obviously. [People]
In “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” land, mother/daughter bonding consists of teaching your daughter how to shave your face before painting up the old barn. Because hey, Alana might as well practice getting rid of “turkey neck” hair, which will be sprouting on her face soon enough. In a clip from tonight’s episode, we see Pumpkin wield a razor and shaving cream to help Mama June get beautimous for her big commitment ceremony to Sugar Bear. And in case you were wondering, there will be no biscuit waxing for the big day. June shaves everywhere, baby. I swear, I’m going on the June Thompson beauty plan where you fart to stay thin, wash your hair in the sink and become more beautimous by being happy. Preach!
I’ve already seen the photos of the big event and they are spectacular — there’s a bouncy house and camouflage cake! — so I’m looking forward to the televised version. [People via DListed]
Mama June painted her old barn, wiggled her vajiggle jaggle into a beautimous, camouflage gown and tucked her forklift foot into some bedazzled sneakers for a ceremony of some sort this weekend. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say she and Sugar Bear got hitched. But they don’t normally have bouncy houses and serve sketti at weddings, do they? You can check it out the highlights of the big event for yourself and see what you think. I believe a mazel tov is in order.
“You don’t have to do a lot of makeup or whatever. Just take care of yourself, take pride in how you look. There are some days I look homely like hell, but beautimous comes within yourself and if you’re happy with yourself, that’s all that matters.”
– I’ll admit that Mama June from “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” would not be the first person I’d expect to dole out a great beauty tip. I mean, this is a woman who has neck crust. But I can admit when I am wrong! Mama June’s tip to a viewer on a recent Facebook live-chat on how to be “extra beautimous” is actually balls-on correct. You’ll never read this in Allure magazine, but a pretty face or slim physique mean nothing — nothing — if you aren’t happy with yourself. Beautimousness does come from within! [TLC]