The December issue of Vanity Fair contains a pretty shocking article called “A Crime Of Shadows.” The piece is about a convicted sex offender named “J” who was coaxed by Pennsylvania detective Michele Deery into meeting for sex in a parking lot. While this is not a crime, Deery had posed in a chat room as “Heather,” a mother with two kids and she made it very clear to J that she wanted her young children—who she said were ages 8 and 11—to be involved. Deery and J had quite a lot of nasty back-and-forth before their meeting, where a bunch of cops, not a mother and her two kids, showed up and slapped J with a slew of charges, landing him time in prison. But what about his side of the story? That’s what this piece focuses on.

Oh my God, look! Models—not celebrities—on the cover of a fashion magazine! And they’re black! November’s Teen Vogue published a fantastic cover story about models Chanel Iman and Jourdan Dunn, who spoke candidly about the racism in the modeling industry and the competition that results when black models feel there can only be “one black girl.” (Chanel is actually black and Korean—damn, she should have been in our biracial hotties slideshow!) The pair dished to Teen Vogue about the fashion industry’s flat-out racism:

Iman: “You’re being told, ‘So and so is only booking one black girl. It’s either you or Jourdan,’ So we’ll be sitting in the lobby looking at each other like, ‘Okay, I want this job, and she wants it too. Which one of us is going to get it?’”

Dunn: “I remember last season, I was about to go into a casting, and my agent phoned and said, ‘Turn back. They decided they don’t want any black models.’ I was like, ‘They’re actually telling you that’s the reason? Are you serious?!’”

It’s hump day again, and while you might not be taking advantage of your opportunity to “hump” today,  it’s safe to assume that the stars are busy enough for the rest of the population—at least if you think everything you read is true! Once again, we’ve hand-plucked the juiciest tabloid stories for your media consumption, so take it with several grains of salt, and eat it up!

What’s the latest must-have for the forward-thinking fashionista? H1N1, if the latest provocative layout from photographer Steven Klein for Vogue Italia is to be believed. Previously, Klein has used everything from the Iraq war to the NSA to tell his fashion stories, and this new spread from the November issue is no exception. In it, flame-haired model Rianne ten Haken seems to be grappling with the consequences of living in a contagion-filled world. Surrounded by men in white masks, she ends up collapsed on the floor with no one to help her. Good thing she looks damn good with the swine flu. Check out more images after the jump.

• Robert Pattinson denies rumors that he and Kristen Stewart are dating in the December issue of Vanity Fair. Also in the story, he says he thinks he resembles a cartoon character and that one of his legs is longer than the other. [Vanity Fair]—This could be the first time the Tiger Beat crowd will rush to purchase a copy of Vanity Fair.
• Lindsay Lohan and Gerard Butler reportedly got cozy in Morocco on Sunday night, locking lips on the dance floor and then leaving together. [NY Daily News]—If this is true, Gerard is totally taking advantage of Lindsay, who still seems to be getting over Sam Ronson.
• Some people are saying Kate Hudson, who is dating Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez, is a good luck charm for the team. Also, a source told Us Weekly that A-Rod is “less of a jerk” and “more free-spirited” now that he’s with her. [Us Weekly]—If he’s become less of a jerk, she’s a real miracle worker.

In the upcoming issue of Seventeen there’s a story about a young woman who discovered that her boyfriend was actually a female. While I think it’s cool that a traditional teen magazine like Seventeen is covering the existence of transgender teenagers, which wouldn’t have happened when I was reading the mag back in the day. But the story’s angle doesn’t do much to discourage negative attitudes towards teenagers who are struggling with their gender identity, and that’s a shame.

Oh sweet Wednesdays, alleviating the happy hangovers of last weekend and preparing us for the crazy times that will be this weekend’s Halloween candy-corn binge. Just like the neighborhood kids, your favorite celebrities are also playing make-believe—although not voluntarily—in the pages of this week’s tabloids. Once again, we’ve compiled the super true-ish stories from this week’s ‘bloids for your unembarrassed perusal. Enjoy, cause this week’s are pretty major.

Michelle Obama is doing her part to save the struggling magazine industry by appearing on the cover of Glamour for its December Women of the Year issue. Editor in chief Cindi Leive writes on Glamour‘s website that the magazine is honoring the first lady’s “commitment to mentoring young women.” On the inside pages, Michelle is pictured with seven interns from the East Wing, and she gives women advice for reaching our goals:

“I was blessed throughout my entire career. I had people rooting for me. It started with my parents, but it extended to almost every teacher that I had. When I was a young lawyer, there were other women and men in the firm who took me under their wing. Look for those mentors, because sometimes mentors don’t find you—sometimes you seek them out. Oftentimes, they’re flattered and glad to lend a hand.”

Happy hump day! For this joyously slow news week, the tabloids were more random than ever, reminding us that no news is not reason enough to not print the news. Instead, it is reason enough to create something better than truth: intrigue. So, in an effort not to gather facts, but to create an even better existence based on subtle hints and unnamed sources, we’ve read every tabloid and picked the most interesting stories to share with you.

So ... when Hollywood starlets want to be provocative, they lez out in photoshoots. And apparently, when gay men want to be provocative they tongue female models? Color us confused by this Details cover shoot featuring “American Idol” runner-up, Adam Lambert. Lambert is an out-and-proud gay man, but tells the mag, “...I like kissing women sometimes. Women are pretty. It doesn’t mean I’m necessarily sleeping with them.” Personally, I wouldn’t have minded a shot or two of Glambert frenching his hot boyfriend, but then again, I sometimes like gay dude porn. So what do you think of this racy shoot? Sexy or cheap? Check out one more shot, after the jump. [Details]

Those of you who’ve looked carefully at the new cover of GQ probably noticed that January Jones’ boobs look, in a word, amazing. And, uh, much bigger than one would’ve thought from skinny Betty Draper? A “source” from inside the magazine squealed and told the New York Post, “They definitely did some significant retouching.” But now GQ‘s photo editor has shot back with this statement:

“Yes, they’re real. And they’re spectacular. People think that a person will look the same in every photograph, but that just doesn’t happen ... Terry [Richardson] likes to work with harder lighting, and that can create a stronger shadow—that, and body position and perspective could give the illusion that her breasts are bigger. January Jones needed no help. Trust me.”

Trust me? Doesn’t he sound like a football player in the locker room bragging about the girl he got to first base with after the school dance? Do you agree that the rotundness of her chest could be a lighting issue, or were these totally digitally enhanced?

Have you ever noticed how, if one woman in a room is perusing a glossy magazine, all the other women in the room magically gravitate towards her and somehow end up reading over her shoulder? Let’s face it, with their gorgeous photo spreads, the splashy headlines and celebrity interviews, women’s magazines are pretty darn addictive. Just so you don’t have to plop down $3.99 on each and every November issue, we’ve scoured them all to tell you which ones are bringing you fresh stories and ideas, and which ones are just recycling the same old drivel. After the jump, six issues dissected and graded.

After we saw the leaked photos of Serena Williams and Sarah Reinertsen, nude, on two covers of ESPN‘s first-ever Body Issue, we knew we had to get our hands on a copy. And today we did.

The Oct. 19 issue has seven different cover variations, each featuring a different athlete. Ours features a glistening Dwight Howard, the Orlando Magic basketball player. Inside the magazine, there is more nudity than we had expected to see in ESPN, especially since a lot of the naked and nearly naked bodies belong to men. The story that shows photos of athletes’ scars and other physical costs of dedication makes sense, in our opinion, for the magazine. The numerous images of athletes without any or many clothes? Not so much. Our only guess is that ESPN is trying to attract more women readers. And we’re not complaining.

Click through for the full, somewhat NSFW version of the above photo featuring the D.C. United soccer team.

It’s Wednesday again, and if you were lucky enough to get Columbus Day off, you probably didn’t even notice that the week is half over. Thankfully, we’re here to remind you that the best ‘bloids hit the newsstands today. Heaven forbid you actually pay for them, so we scooped them up in the wee hours of the morning, read them cover to glossy cover and picked out the most amazing, totally true (yeah, right) tidbits for you.

January Jones, aka “Mad Men”‘s Betty Draper, is on the cover of November’s GQ, and in the accompanying article, she eats queso and drinks beer while talking about the progression of her career. A boyfriend’s mom actually helped her learn manners and get rid of her Iowa accent, even after she and the dude broke up! Keep reading for January’s take on Betty and how another ex, who told her she wouldn’t make it in Hollywood, helped her get where she is today.

Excuse me, Grace Coddington approved this? For the November issue of Vogue, Anna and Co. rounded up the female stars of the upcoming movie musical “Nine.” Four of them—Nicole Kidman, Marion Cotillard, Penelope Cruz, and Kate Hudson—are on the cover together, but the overly airbrushed shot makes it oh-so-obvious that photographer Annie Liebovitz shot them separately and spliced them together in Photoshop. Regardless, the beach background is tragic, the fashion makes no sense in context, and they all look like wax figurines. Cover shoot FAIL. [Just Jared]

Just in time for Halloween, Claudia Schiffer stars in a fright night layout in the November issue of Harper’s Bazaar UK. Shot by Michelangelo di Battista, “Mystery in the Moonlight” features Schiffer grappling with the Swamp Thing and other scary creatures of the night. If you’re looking to get inspired for All Hallows’ Eve partying, her retro-noir look is a pretty alternative to all those not-so-sexy “sexy” costumes. More pics after the jump!

It’s no exaggeration when I say that a ton of magazines closed this week. Conde Nast’s Gourmet (sob) and Cookie have heard the death knell. That’s why I was surprised to see that a new one, Get Married, is launching. Seriously, another bridal magazine? Why is a company introducing a new bridal publication after it’s just been announced that Elegant Bride and Modern Bride are folding? Has anyone caught a peek of Get Married? [Gawker]