Pulitzer Prize winning novelist Salman Rushdie took a break from Tweeting about smart stuff (like which Phillip Roth novel is best … I vote for American Pastoral!) to weigh in on Kim Kardashian’s divorce in limerick form:
“The marriage of poor kim #kardashian was krushed like a kar in a krashian / her kris kried, not fair! why kan’t I keep my share? / But kardashian fell klean outa fashion.”
So this is what it looks like when highbrow and lowbrow make a Twitter baby. Absolutely delightful! I feel like Kim should consider hiring him as her publicist. He could write limericks instead of press releases.
Some weeks in the blogging world are known as “slow news weeks.” Those are weeks devoid of pregnancy announcements, sex scandals, and A-list divorces. And there are other weeks when tabloid stories are breaking like waves in a hurricane. Yesterday, we enjoyed a double story break with the announcement of the end of Kim Kardashian’s 72-day marriage to Kris Humphries and Jessica Simpson’s “mummy” confirmation. When big stories break, it’s always strategic. Whenever a celebrity wants to hide something, they make an official statement after the weeklies have dropped. If they’re vying for media attention and blog love, they go public just in time for the story to make the cover of the upcoming issue. So it’s a gain a week, lose a week principle. Keep reading »
I definitely don’t consider myself an expert on marriage, but by virtue of being a semi-expert on celebrity marriages — with an emphasis in “rumors surrounding the cause of their demise” — I have learned some valuable lessons about matrimony. For example, part of figuring out your compatibility in the long-term with your potential spouse requires asking a few simple but crucial questions. Questions these seven celeb brides failed to ask. Don’t make the same mistake!
Well, the love story of Kim Kardashian and, uh, that one guy whose name we barely bothered to remember, has come to a conclusion. Kardashian is filing for divorce, allegedly because her basketball playing husband, Kris Humphries, wanted to live in Minnesota, while she, of course, cannot imagine leaving the paparazzi-filled streets of Hollywood. Kardashian released a statement, saying:
After careful consideration, I have decided to end my marriage. I hope everyone understands this was not an easy decision. I had hoped this marriage was forever, but sometimes things don’t work out as planned. We remain friends and wish each other the best.
Indeed, it probably wasn’t in the plan to end their marriage quite this soon, but Kim luckily has nearly $18 million in crisp dollar bills she made off the wedding to mop up her tears. (Unless, of course, she actually decides to follow any of our suggestions and donates her bounty to a good cause.)
Married for only 72 days, Kim’s (second!) marriage joins a long line of short celeb marriages. Keep clicking to see some of the other speedy celebrity marriages that met an early demise.
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