Tag Archives: kiki t

In Bed With … Emile Hirsch

STAR STATS::
Born: March 13, 1985, Topanga Canyon, California
Sun Sign (Basic Self): Pisces
Ascendant (Social Façade): Time Unknown
Moon (Emotions): Sagittarius Keep reading »

Ask The Astrosexologist: My Sagittarius Booty Call Runs Hot & Cold!

My dilemma involves a man whom I’m extremely attracted to, but very ambivalent about romantically. We’re known each other for over a year and things either seem to move at a snail’s pace or just come to a screeching halt entirely. The last time we were in the same vicinity was sometime in October. He called me at 3am under the guise of being too drunk to drive. Being the kind soul that I am, I picked him up and let him crash at my place. I felt nervous and awkward, but my altruistic side won out. He apologized for his antics, swore up and down that he didn’t blame me for hating him, etc. Naturally, this fueled my frustration and I may have ripped into him a little about his actions towards me. We fooled around, but no intercourse occurred. This is the second time he’s stoked my fire just enough, but not enough to go all the way. I feel cautious because it feels like he is hiding something, but I can’t put my finger on what. I want to believe that he cares, but his broken words leave me doubting. It feels like I should walk away, but very time I seem to get to that point is when he happens to show up again. I don’t know whether this is one to walk away from or try to make a go at it. I don’t know if my head or my heart or both are right in this situation. My DOB is March 10, 1984 (birth time 5:30 pm Nassau, Bahamas) and his DOB is 12/4/1980. — When To Walk Away? Keep reading »

For The Week Of December 1-7, 2008

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

No matter how much logic you use to figure out your boo’s next move, you won’t be successful. He’s going to be unpredictable, shaking up your household and causing major upheavals to your domestic routines. The good news is that your relationship can use a breath of fresh air and this bout of extremes will do more than its fair share to revive the passion.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

If your love life has been in a slump, the universe’s suggestion is as follows: put away your preconceived notions, hop on the Internet and strike up an international flirtation just to get your blood pumping. It’ll be far enough to keep you from getting hooked, but accessible enough to get your ready to hit the locale scene more confidently and charismatically.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Talk is boring, no matter how seductive the words, because at this stage of your game, if all you have are promises and no actions, you’re as good as nowhere. This week, stop listening and start demanding. If you’re not getting your needs met, end the charades. The good news, if you stand up for yourself, a just payback for your wasted time will arrive promptly.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

You’ll be feeling inspired and loving life; exuding energy with every step and being you’re in your prime. The bizarre twist to it all? Your attractions will veer right and you’ll find your satisfactions with safer tastes. Hey, whatever gets you off. At the least, this malleable bottom will be the perfect compliment to you being the revved-up-top, so bon appetite!

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

You know what turns you on, so fess up and own it. Rather than thinking yourself a pervert and hiding your dirty little secret, wear it like a badge of honor. Be proud you at least know that much about yourself, as most people won’t even get that far. Plus, if you say it with pride, you’ll find that right ear to hear it loud and strong, proving that the laws of attraction are on your side.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

It’s sexy to have a secret love affair, but not if you’re having it out of the shame and judgment you feel others will give. No matter, the cat is coming out of the bag this week, as snooping friends catch onto your game and expose your double life. However, unlike what you suspect, the support you’ll get will have you barreling out of the closet with pride

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Listening to your friends is the only way you can get yourself out of the mess you’ve dug up with a current flirtation gone wrong. Seems there’s a dangerous web you’ve woven and it’ll take more than just a few apologies to get you out. Instead, corral the team to create a major strategy with precision execution. Yes, sometimes it takes village to keep your love life on track.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Keep your eye on the prize, as in holding tight to your ideals and zipping your integrity in your pants. You know your instincts don’t lie and going against your agenda isn’t doing you any favors. Besides, if there’s one thing you hate, it’s knowing that another has won something over on you — and in this case, is he even worth it? Don’t let horny curiosity be your downfall.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Being screwed-over by sweet-talking cuties with only sex on the brain has taken its toll. Now, with the tables are turned, it’s you that possesses all the power. However, deciding where to let your karma flow isn’t as easy as you thought, as it’ll contort your mind and twist your body into shapes and places you never thought possible. Seems having a soul isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

As long as you keep your standards low and your patience in check, they’ll be no reason your love life can’t go into cruise control and have you feeling as if you’re on a sunny all-inclusive vacation in paradise. So what if you have to ignore a few details and play up your imagination a little? Just be happy you’ve landed someone to look the part.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Relationships aren’t easy. If it were, would there be as many songs about it or books on how to get a clue? Keep this in mind as your brain hits a crazy place that has your jealousies raging out of control and your paranoia getting the better of you. What does this all mean? You’re in deep. How to set yourself free of this madness? Fess up and admit those three magic words.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

You’ll be in that perfect romantic mindset to set the stage for all things beautiful in your love life, worshiping your honey and having the same awestruck emotions flooding back. However, because life is a bitch, things are never that easy. As much as you want the story to unfold flawlessly, realize the one glitch that has this from moving ahead? The workaholic in you.

In Bed With … Robert Pattinson

STAR STATS
Born: May 13, 1986 London, Time Unknown
Sun Sign (Basic Self): Taurus
Ascendant (Social Façade): ?
Moon (Emotions): Cancer Keep reading »

Poll: Who Should Kiki T Get “In Bed With” Next?

Last week our own astrosexologist extraordinaire, Kiki T, got “In Bed With” our President Elect, Barack Obama. This week she’s analyzing the astrological chart of a breakout movie star (you’ll have to check back on Friday to see who!), but we’d like your input on who she should get beneath the sheets with next week. Whose sex life are you dying to know more about? Keep reading »

For The Week Of November 24-30, 2008

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Don’t be scared of innovation. When it comes to getting more out of old situation, it’ll mean taking bigger risks and shaking up your foundations to try something far fetched — and the more progressive the ideas, the more they’ll work. Yes, long as you remain passionate and show how much you want it, fate will find its way to grant you your wish.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

On the agenda: making decisions on where to set your anchor. Although you may love whom you’re with, thinking for the long-term will be pressing on your mind and it’ll mean projecting yourself into your ideal future, uncovering what your real happily ever after is and accepting the picture you find, no matter what. From there, actions will be obvious and possibly painful.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Intimacy isn’t your strong quality. Either you avoid it like the plague or you are so hardcore about it, you squeeze those close to you to a pulp. While you always mean well, it’s not working. To get back on track, time to change your song and dance. Time to redefine what being well-adjusted is without thinking it’s going to bore you.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Erase, “No,” from your vocabulary, as doing what you want, when you want and however you want will be your path to a living nirvana. It’s a time to take no prisons, as in letting your mouth run and having your body follow, as when you’ll be at your rawest is when you’ll be at your sexiest and most effective. Yes, time to see if others can rise to the challenge.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Guilt is a dirty word and the more you judge yourself for a past wrong doing, the more defeated you get and the sad thing is, at the end of the day, it’s only you who is punishing yourself as harshly as you are. There’s no scoreboard, but until you really embrace that fact, help yourself along in the healing process by embracing the teaches of Peaches, “F*** The Pain Away.”

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Your love life is running all over the place and not in a good way. As if goes, your objectivity is shot and there isn’t a quick fix you can implement alone — which means time to call in your most clever friends to cook up a scheme to get you back on the fast track with your honey, as it goes with you, Miss. Sign of Friendship, it sometimes does take a village.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

You career will be moving up a few notches and into a faster lane. This will mean you have to step up to the plate and make your love life a priority just the same. You have a tendency to flip to the extremes, but this time around you have way too much on the line to just wing it. This time around, organization is mandatory.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

The structure of your life is starting to come undone and you should let it. All the rules you put on yourself have done nothing, but backed up you into a wall. Face it, the view sucks and you aren’t as happy as you thought. While you have proven you have a great ability to complete task, you haven’t proven how to sustain happiness — put that back on top of your agenda now.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Behind close doors, you love it dirty. However, there’s no need to have to keep everything under a tight lid, as the more you express your frisky side, the more the laws of attraction will work for you. Forget the shame, forget the guilt, forget the pristine image you want to project, etc. From here on out, call it as you want it or be stuck with the crumbs.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

You’re either committed to love or on your way to being committed because of love. There are no other options for you now as the extremes are hitting you hard and making you think all sorts of crazy things about yourself, life and the male species. To find out which side of fate you want to experience, be willing to dig deep into your inner soul to find the answers.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Thanks to a major shift in your partnership house (big bad Pluto the karma planet moving in for the next 16 years), expect your closest relationships to go through a complete transformation starting now. What it means? Being quicker to cut the bullsh*t ties that have only kept you busy and rising to a higher standard for those you love. All round, improvements all the way.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

As long as you can articulate yourself, you’ll be clear of any love catastrophes. Seems your words will be the sweetest music to someone out there, seducing him to do as you wish. However, know there will be a payback time and that how you set up the foundation now will set the price for later. In other words, be kind.

In Bed With…Barack Obama

STAR STATS
Born: Aug 4, 1961, 7:24 PM in Honolulu, Hawaii
Sun Sign (Basic Self): Leo
Ascendant (Social Façade): Aquarius
Moon (Emotions): Gemini Keep reading »

Ask The Astrosexologist: Should I Trade In My Capricorn Husband For A Gemini Boy Toy?

I’ve been in a relationship for 10+years (we’re both Capricorns) and we got married last April. We own a house together, have a dog, etc. He is a computer geek (I’m an amateur photographer), however, a couple of years ago he traded in his hardcore gaming lifestyle for a hobby we could share together — racing his car. We had great fun getting away for the weekends and spending time together.

Unfortunately, this came to a screeching halt a few months ago when he wrecked his car at the track and the insurance failed to pay. So, on top of having his hobby squashed, we were stressed about the car we are still paying off and he turned back to video games to fill his time…all of his free time. At our core we are very different. I like to go out, have a good time, be social and have fun. He likes to stay at home and play games. To defy him, I started going out with close friends all of the time, including one guy friend in particular, who I had hooked up with years ago. He’s a Gemini.

Keep reading »

For The Week Of November 17-23, 2008

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Your drive will be tanking, as your energies get scattered. Instead of panicking and thinking the worst, take this as a sign to cool down and recollect yourself. If anything, this is a perfect opportunity to rekindle the magic with your baby and realize there is more to your life than just fighting for the finer things, but appreciating them too.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

You mind will be wandering far from your body; to get things to match up again, take a spontaneous trip. Even if time won’t allow anything major, just doing a sleep over at a friends will do the trick as anything that removes you from your day to day life will do wonders in putting you back in the right frame of mind to f**k and frolic the way you love it once again.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

It’ll be all out anarchy at Scorpio central this week. Your mind will run about with ambitious thoughts, your body consumed with more practical pursuits and then there’ll be your spirit. Seems your inner soul will be feeling a bit restless and a bout of wild curiosities will tempt you into all sorts of interesting turmoil. Yes, you know it, the bitch is back!

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

It’s your way or the highway and if your honeyman can’t get with that program, then he better reconsider who he is getting himself in deeper with. This isn’t your time to compromise and there’s no reason you should be. If anyone thinks they can interfere, well, that person has no idea who you really are and won’t ever. Accept that now and forever have your peace.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

A trip down memory lane can happen any moment, forcing you to have to rectify your past and deal with ongoing issues that are driving a big ole wedge into your love life. Although using this as your cushion to avoid anyone getting close to you has been a fun game of cat and mouse so far, things won’t be as cute going forward. Cease and desist those blocks now!

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Exploring new faces and different places will make for a big surge in your popularity, as long as you know how to spread your love around and work it, because sitting in one place too long won’t bode well for you, as going in too deep with anyone will cause friction and disinterest. You know it, it’s all about the superficialness this week, so live it, love it and OD on it.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Your motivation will be on the rise, but if you waste this energy towards your romance, rather than your career, you’ll be missing the boat of major opportunities to get to a new level in your life that can have you meeting a higher standard of men that will understand your dreams better and know how to support you. In other words, fight your instant gratification instinct!

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Your appetite for adventure will increase to a heightened level of excitement and make you horny for foreign meat. Break free of your confines and do all you can to get what you must, as tasting the pleasure of something out of your norm will be what satisfies you the most. If this means booking yourself a trip to a far away land, consider it foreplay for the best ride of your life.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

You are under no obligation to have to tell whom ever you are sleeping with all you secrets, unless they are of the STD variety. Otherwise, having some mystery should be an enticement to keep the passion alive. However, playing this both ways is going to be necessary to make it work, as in accepting he’s got a few skeletons in his closet too.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Get off the fence and say, “Yes!” Whatever opportunities are coming your way in terms of partnership will only bring about luck. Sure, you have some issues with commitment, as in claustrophobia, but nothing ever has to be forever. Instead of trying to paint a big ugly picture, see it as pieces of a puzzle you want to sort out.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Changing up your routines will do wonders for your overall morale, as just thinking about a better life isn’t going to happen — that just isn’t how the laws of attraction work. To win it, you have to be in it. So, this means putting your feet in the water and not being afraid to get a little dirty. Besides, deep down what you truly do desire is a little filth.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Your libido will have a mind of its own and if you try stopping it from its path of destruction, you will only have yourself to blame, as it seems it will have an invincible power to see, aim, and conquer. So, just sit back, look pretty and follow those impulses, as it’ll give you all that you want and didn’t know you thought was so delectable.

Ask The Astrosexologist: Has My Marriage Just Lost Its Steam?

“Life is too short for the marriage I have. I love my husband dearly — we’ve been together for 10 years and we have three kids, but we’ve had many troubles over the years. He causes some terrible financial messes and never learns from them. He also cheats — mainly cyber, but possibly for real. No matter how much proof I see, he denies it all. It’s terribly frustrating for me. I adore sex, have a head full of fantasies I feel I never get to share, let alone do. He won’t flirt with me, but he flirts with other women. No efforts are made to seduce me, no birthday presents, no dirty talk, he won’t tell me what turns him on and he never asks me what I want. I feel like I’m just a friend, a frumpy housewife and not his lover. I’m not even 30 yet and I feel my life as a sexy woman is totally over. It’s driving me insane. What do I do?! (I was born 16th of January 16, 1979 at 5:10pm in Chelmsford, Essex, U.K. He was born October 4, 1974 in Chelmsford, Essex, UK.)” – Husband Trouble Keep reading »

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