Tag Archives: kate middleton

Quickies: Black Market Invites To The Royal Wedding & Lady Gaga Loses Her Virginity

  • A British reporter was offered a black market wedding invitation to Prince William and Kate Middleton’s nuptials for $3,200, supposedly via the printer who made them. How much would you be willing to pay for a black market or scalped invite? [Gawker]
  • More information than you require: Lady Gaga lost her virginity at age 17, hated sex until two years ago. [Monsters & Critics]
  • James Franco and Lindsay Lohan will be photographed naked in an “explicit” new photo book by pervy photographer Terry Richardson. Prepare for some firecrotch, people. [Oh No They Didn't!]

Keep reading »

Kate Middleton Gets “No More Waity Katie” Purple Nail Polish By Butter London

Cheese puff celebs like Justin Bieber introduce their own nail polish lines. But Butter London has named their own limited edition nail polish for Kate Middleton, a shimmery purple called No More Waity Katie (her nickname in the press). Supposedly, No More Waity Katie is greige — grey and beige — but that color sure looks like purple to me! I’d like to get my fingers on this polish — and this polish on my fingers — but, hey, Butter, don’t you think $14 is a bit stiff? Not all of us are marrying into royalty, you know. [T Magazine] Keep reading »

Poll: Whose Wedding Would You Rather Attend — Hugh Hefner’s Or Prince William’s?

Whose Wedding Would You Rather Attend -- Hugh Hefner's Or Prince William's?

  • View Results
Loading ... Loading ...

Brewery Makes “Kiss Me Kate (Middleton)” Beer

Kate Middleton and I have something big in common. We are both marrying princes named Kate. And now that a brewery in Nottingham has dreamed up this royal wedding themed beer, I am feeling closer to Kate then ever before. Apparently she has been tortured by the existence of Cole Porter’s musical “Kiss Me Kate,” which is based on Shakespeare’s “Taming of the Shrew,” too! Over the years, way too many guys have preluded a smooch with the words “Kiss Me Kate,” which—I won’t lie—makes me want to gag each and every time. Not to mention all the teachers I had, kindergarten through college, who alluded to the play’s name or plot after calling on me in class. I’m just glad to know Kate Middleton feels my pain. Keep reading »

The Royal Wedding Barf Bag

Keep this royal wedding barf bag handy on April 29th, 2011, every time you’re reminded 1) how much this is costing the British taxpayers, and 2) you’re not the one about to become a princess. It should have been me, Prince William. It should have been me! [Creative Review UK] Keep reading »

With Royal Wedding Condoms, British Taxpayers Won’t Be The Only Ones Getting Screwed!

Royal wedding memorabilia has reached a new level of tastelessness: Crown Jewels Condoms of Distinction is selling Prince William and Kate Middleton-themed condoms! Instructing randy Brits to “lie back and think of England” because “like a royal wedding, intercourse with a loved one is an unforgettable occasion,” the condoms are sold in royal purple packages with a picture of the happy couple on the front. But some folks are not amused. “This is completely tasteless and rather hurtful,” Ingrid Deward, editor of Majesty magazine, told Orange News. “Prince William has a great sense of humor but this is a step too far.” Alas, Crown Jewels warns customers their condoms are only “heirloom products” and do not actually protect you against pregnancy or STDs. Maybe you could hang them on the wall next to your royal wedding heirloom plate that says “It should have been me!” [Orange] Keep reading »

Prince William And Kate Middleton Get A Lifetime Movie, We Suggest Plot Points

Prince William and Kate Middleton are getting the Lifetime movie treatment. Yup, sometime in April before their April 29th wedding, Lifetime will air a movie about their courtship. According to Entertainment Weekly, Nico Evers-Swindell of “Law & Order” and “NCIS: Los Angeles” will play Prince William, Ben Cross of “Chariots of Fire” will play Prince Charles, and the actress to play Kate Middleton has not yet been cast. No matter, this movie is totally going to be better than “The Craigslist Killer”!

Now, we all know that in Lifetime movies, someone dies a horrific and untimely death. I’m pretty sure that’s not going to happen in this movie. (Except for the Princess Di part.) But we can imagine what kind of ridiculous Lifetime-esque plots, full of passion, intrigue, and even more passion, that they could come up with … Keep reading »

Prince William And Kate Middleton’s Wedding: Did You Get Your Save-The-Date Fax?

Planning a royal wedding is no joke—Kate Middleton has resigned from her post at her parent’s party supply company to attend to all the assorted details of her April 29th nuptials. Already, we’re a little worried that the event might be stuck in the ’80s—Kate is wearing Diana’s decade-of-decadence engagement ring, the couple’s engagement photos look eerily like the ones Princess Charles and Diana took back in the day, and the wedding is going down in Westminster Abbey which … booorrrring. And now we hear that the Buckingham Palace staff has sent out save-the-date notices to the royal families of Europe—by fax machine. I mean, couldn’t they just have sent carrier pigeons? [OMG News, People] Keep reading »

No Servants For Prince William And Kate Middleton For 3 Years

Prince Charles is rumored to have a servant who squirts his toothpaste on his toothbrush. But Prince William and Kate Middleton will forgo such extravagances — for three years at least. The engaged couple will do their own laundry and cook their own meals for the remainder of the prince’s RAF military service, according to a royal source. That’s how long the couple intends to live on weekends in a cottage William rented in the town of Anglesey. “Prince William is not into extravagance and, like any other young officer in the armed forces, that is how he chooses to live his life,” said the source. “He and [Kate] live without domestic staff and they wouldn’t do it any other way. That’s the life they want to lead.” Of course, William and Kate have 24-hour body guards protecting them, but otherwise they live without maids or butlers. At least these kids don’t have any full-time staff; somehow I don’t imagine Prince William scrubbing his own toilet once a week.
Keep reading »

Get Your Commemorative Royal Wedding Plates Right Here

This funky “Thanks for the free day off: HRH Prince William & Kate Middleton‘s 4 day bender” commemorative plate from KK Outlets is the perfect way to honor the ZOMG wedding of the century. What? Here in the U.S., the royal wedding won’t be a day off from work? Bollocks.

Let’s see a few other bits of sassy “unofficial wedding paraphernalia” from KK Outlets in the U.K., which will begin selling the plates after January 15: Keep reading »

  • Zergnet: Simply Irresistible

  • HowAboutWe

  • Popular